You and I have a lot of similarities in the way we handle relationships.
You feel like you pour out a lot of time and energy and emotional turmoil and lots of time thinking about others. When you don't feel like you get that kind of care and attentions give back to you by all of the people that you give it out too, it hurts more than normal because you feel like you care more for them than they do for you.
You have to be careful in how much time and attention you spend on other. And you have to be careful about that BECAUSE in general, people just don't care that much about others. When we spend so much time trying to be the protector and defender of relationships, we are opening ourselves up to let down. It's human nature to be selfish. When you are so altruistic, it's only logical that you're going to run into more selfish people than you are self-sacrificers.
I know you can't change who you are, but you can alter it a tad. Invest more heavily in the people who are the closest to you. The further out a relationship is, the less attention it needs. You also can't control someone's happiness or their behavior. Take care of yourself and your closest loved ones first. Then you can worry about other people after that.
It will take some time to get it to work right and it feels funny sometimes being selfish. But you'll see that it's a better system.
You feel like you pour out a lot of time and energy and emotional turmoil and lots of time thinking about others. When you don't feel like you get that kind of care and attentions give back to you by all of the people that you give it out too, it hurts more than normal because you feel like you care more for them than they do for you.
You have to be careful in how much time and attention you spend on other. And you have to be careful about that BECAUSE in general, people just don't care that much about others. When we spend so much time trying to be the protector and defender of relationships, we are opening ourselves up to let down. It's human nature to be selfish. When you are so altruistic, it's only logical that you're going to run into more selfish people than you are self-sacrificers.
I know you can't change who you are, but you can alter it a tad. Invest more heavily in the people who are the closest to you. The further out a relationship is, the less attention it needs. You also can't control someone's happiness or their behavior. Take care of yourself and your closest loved ones first. Then you can worry about other people after that.
It will take some time to get it to work right and it feels funny sometimes being selfish. But you'll see that it's a better system.
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