may have done something bad - help!

[katsujinken]

Hi everyone. my S/O and I talked amost every day for months and then a couple days before her birthday she completely disappeared. We had finally bought our tickets to see one another and she just vanished. She didn't reply to my email on her birthday, she didn't reply to my email a couple days later saying I miss her and she didn't reply to my email a couple days after that saying i was worried untl yesterday, which she said...

I'm sorry I dropped off the edge of the earth for a bit... I've been dealing with some family "heavies" as you put it. I've kind of become a hermit the last week and I didn't mean to leave you twisting in the wind.
How have you been? How's school? I'm glad that my spring quarter is coming to an end soon.
But, aye ya... I'll try and pop on in a bit and say hello properly, but I thought I'd write you a little note before that, sir. <3

however not half an hour before she finally replied I cracked and despite in my last email saying that i wouldn't contact her again until I heard back but I sent her a flower with a card as a last ditch effort to let her know I was worried and I'm not angry just in case she couldn't read her emails or answer her phone. It said...

You're still missing & I'm so scared you're in trouble. If you are then stay strong. You have friends and family who care about you, I care about you & I hope it passes soon. If you can't make our meeting, I'll understand but just let me know either way. If you can't read this then whoever does, please contact me. I am very worried.

I replied to her email telling her how relieved she is safe and warning her of the flower but she still hasn't come back to say hello like she said she would nor have I heard anything since the flower was delivered 5 hours ago. Did I go too far? She disappeared for 12 days and I was just so worried. Is she really not coming back this time? :'(

[Lunar Snow]

Hey,

I'm finding this a bit puzzling. Maybe we are missing some information. How soon are you supposed to be meeting? I'm trying to gather if her disappearing is actually related at all to visiting with you or not visiting with you. If you say that you both have your tickets and she did email you, not mentioning that the trip was off, why are you concerned that it is off?

I think her email reply to you indicates that she is quite occupied with some things in her family life. I can understand her keeping that description as a minimum; sometimes I feel overwhelmed by family issues, but then I also feel like they aren't necessarily solely my business to tell other people.

I understand that if you talk almost every day, then 12 days (not even two weeks) would feel like agony (I go a little loopy, sometimes, with a couple of days). I think the flower and the card, because they were sent before you got her email were okay. As for her not responding yet, give it a little time...even if she did receive the flower five hours ago, you have to remember that she probably has other occurances and obligations in her day (maybe she had to go to the grocery store, visit a sick family member, etc.).

[Belle]

I think now that you know that she is going through something, you should be more patient. She did catch you up on whats going on and apologized for taking so long to respond. Its obvious that you were worried about her and you gave her chances to respond. I wish you the best and make sure you give her time to deal with whatever it is that is going on. Good luck =)

[Insanity]

I know exactly how you feel and I don't think you did anything wrong. It's horrible when your SO disappears and its pretty selfish, don't be surprised if she does it again, things like this don't seem to change.
Keep in mind she did come back to contact you so then most likely she'll be back again. Why would she have contacted you if she had no intentions of coming back?
I'm sorry you're going through this I really am, it's a horrible feeling and really messes with ones head. I hope you hear from her soon

[katsujinken]

We're getting together in three weeks so if she forgets to immediately get her passport card to travel into Canada where we're meeting which is a 6 hour flight for me too than she can't come even if she wants to and we'll both be out a lot of money.

[Zephii]

Hopefully she isn't so bogged down that something like that would happen. Try not to panic, at least she's safe and everything. I'm sure the flower was sweet more than anything else. I'm sure she'll get to a computer when she can.

[agentholli]

awww I am really sorry to hear this. I would be freaking out also. My SO just disappeared once...and it pissed me off...I was so super worried and I thought that i meant more to him then that. I got really upset at it and he promised it would never happen like that again.

When he did disappear he had sooooo much going on in his life that he felt very overwhelmed...so don't be to upset at her, but let her know it is NOT ok to do that. I hope you hear from her soon