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Missing major family events, reunions, parties... :(

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    Missing major family events, reunions, parties... :(

    Today is the 2nd birthday party for my boyfriends's (and in a way my) nephew.
    I really wish I was there with him and his family to celebrate it!
    It makes me very sad that I cannot go.
    But yeah, that how life is and will always be in a long-distance relationship, isn't it?


    How do you feel about it?
    Are you very close to your family/ your SO's family?
    Did you already miss any major or little but important family parties, reunions or events? (Either because you moved to be with your SO, or you missed some of your SO's family because you couldn't be there.... etc...)



    #2
    The biggest event I'll be missing so far is my brother's graduation from college. I'll be flying in the day after. I tried so hard to figure out a way to get home in time, but I just couldn't make it. I missed my sister getting promoted in the Navy. I missed Christmas, and of course all the birthdays for the past year. Basically the only thing I'll be home for this year is my mom's wedding party. It's going to be great!!!

    I guess it sucks, but it is what it is. I'm happy for the things I do get to be around for, not grumpy about the stuff I miss.

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      #3
      So far, the only two events my SO and I have missed, are Valentine's Day and my birthday. We haven't been together that long :P, but I do realize if we keep on the same track, we'll miss some family events (if we make the decision of closing the distance in the future, I'd be moving to Canada, so that means we'd miss most of my family's events and big dates) and it makes me sad.

      However, I went LD with my two exes for 6 months. The only events I missed were our anniversary (on both relationships).

      I wasn't that close to my first ex's family, plus nothing really important or relevant happened. With my second ex, I was kind of close to part of his family, so when he left, he asked me to go to one of his cousins birthday party (from the part I wasn't that close to) with his mom and sister, but i felt so uncomfortable without him I didn't do it ever again.

      “Laughing like children, living like lovers, rolling like thunder under the covers”

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        #4
        Its easier to say what haven't we missed. In 12 years we've been together for:
        Christmas 2x (with my family)
        July 4th 1x
        Guy Fawkes 1x
        My Birthday 1x
        Emma's Birthday 1x

        Missing events has never bothered me, not even a bit.. but this July 11th his sister is getting married, I can't be there.

        Everything I know, and anywhere I go, It gets hard but it won't take away my love,
        And when the last one falls, when it's all said and done, It gets hard but it won't take away my love

        sigpic

        Me without Him is like Son of Beast without the loop.

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          #5
          It really hurts me when I miss things. My SO and I were close distance for a pretty long time so it's weird not being there for things I should be there for, you know? It's also weird because his two cousins just got new girlfriends. So those new girls were at their St. Patrick's Day party and I didn't get to go :/

          I'm pretty close to my SO's family. His mom considers me basically her daughter in law already. His family always asks about me if I'm not there. I help cook and bake for the family parties, which are always held at my SO's house. My SO's little cousins love me too, especially the little girl who likes to play "I Spy" with me!

          My SO is also always invited to my immediate family's events. My extended family isn't close so we don't really get together. My SO has met my one set of grandparents and they like him which is all that matters.

          Thankfully due to my college schedule I get to go to most events. I missed their St. Patrick's Day party two weeks ago which was sad because as I said above the new girlfriends got to go :/ I will miss their Easter party too. Thankfully I get to be there for all Christmases!

          Became a couple: March 17th, 2010
          Started our college long distance relationship: August 2011
          Surprise engagement in Disneyworld! : March 22nd, 2013
          Closed the distance: May 2nd, 2014
          Became his wife and started our happily ever after!: May 17th, 2014

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            #6
            I'd say as a couple we're closer to my family. My boyfriend lives with my grandparents and they treat him as if he was their very own grandchild. He would like to be closer to his family, but that's just not their dynamic. They haven't been there for him in the way he would like them to be. He gets that from my family.

            I like his family and they are very nice people, but I can see the little things that my boyfriend has commented on that are missing. It's just how the mindset is. We're both kind of dreading having our families meet. They just don't seem like they're going to mesh very well. Good people on either side, but the dynamic of each is very very different. We both rarely talk to his step-siblings (step mom's kids) and I have yet to meet his younger sisters (his mom's kids) or his mom.

            We've had more holidays with my family as a couple. The only one we've had together with his family is Thanksgiving. That was just with his grandma, uncle, aunt and cousin. His dad and (now) step mom were in Florida with her kids getting married. I was invited along, but money was an issue so my boyfriend stayed behind to have my Thanksgiving break with me at his house.
            Last edited by 11MikesGirl21; March 31, 2012, 05:25 PM.
            ". . . We obviously have to come to accept it, but that doesn't stop it from gnawing at us day by day.
            The best we can do is enjoy our time together, anticipate our reunions, and remain passionate and loyal through distance." ~Mike <3



            ~*~11.21.2010~*~

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              #7
              Well, I've missed his sister getting married a year ago and I've sent them a small gift but it didn't get there. It's still a sore point with me. I hope I'll be there when his sister's baby is born and his other sister marries.
              I've also missed the wedding of very close friends of his.
              The next main event would be my graduation which he'll be there for. Happy!

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                #8
                As a couple we're closer to his family. I've missed birthdays (and i always miss his birthday : ( ) and other holidays which don't fall in to my vacation time. It's all good though, his family treat me as a part of their family so its all good.

                My family live in a different country to me so i've missed all family gatherings for the past 5 years. When i move to the states it'll be the same thing, i'll miss my family gatherings but im sure they'll come over to see me since my parents are retired.



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