So bit of a background. My mom had cancer, she lost her battle July 5th 2012.
Its been rough on the whole family, But we are getting through it okay.
On the day that it happened my dad said something to me that got under my skin.
" you need to drop that boy he's just an anchor around your neck. "
Which really got to me because he has NO idea how supportive my SO is being through all of this.
But I didnt say anything, I just chalked it up dad being upset at his loss.
I havent told Robert he said this, I've done that in the past, told him my parents statements to me about us and it just caused problems.
Idk why I'm still thinking about what my dad said. its just he cant see how Robert is to me, all he sees is the fact that he doesnt have a job and isnt bringing in money. Money never mattered to me, nor does society's view that the man should provide financially. I have legs and arms that can be used, I can make my own money. I don't expect anyone to help financially unless we are living together and at this point my SO and I arnt.
I've made it clear to Robert that he cant live with me without a job, once I move up there he is welcome to hang out with me and stay the night, but until he gets a job I cant let him move in because we wont have the finances for it.
Tho all my dad sees is that he doesnt have a job now. Not the fact that Robert does everything he can to help me and shows me he loves me each day, not the fact that he's supportive and helpful.
I dont think I can ever get dad to see that side of Robert.
Its been rough on the whole family, But we are getting through it okay.
On the day that it happened my dad said something to me that got under my skin.
" you need to drop that boy he's just an anchor around your neck. "
Which really got to me because he has NO idea how supportive my SO is being through all of this.
But I didnt say anything, I just chalked it up dad being upset at his loss.
I havent told Robert he said this, I've done that in the past, told him my parents statements to me about us and it just caused problems.
Idk why I'm still thinking about what my dad said. its just he cant see how Robert is to me, all he sees is the fact that he doesnt have a job and isnt bringing in money. Money never mattered to me, nor does society's view that the man should provide financially. I have legs and arms that can be used, I can make my own money. I don't expect anyone to help financially unless we are living together and at this point my SO and I arnt.
I've made it clear to Robert that he cant live with me without a job, once I move up there he is welcome to hang out with me and stay the night, but until he gets a job I cant let him move in because we wont have the finances for it.
Tho all my dad sees is that he doesnt have a job now. Not the fact that Robert does everything he can to help me and shows me he loves me each day, not the fact that he's supportive and helpful.
I dont think I can ever get dad to see that side of Robert.
I agree with Ioanna, give your Dad some time, he must be deeply hurting and maybe he feels the responsibility to be twice the parent from now on. He's just trying to cope with the loss. All of you are sensitive and emotional right now and you may say things you don't really mean. I wish I could help you more. 
All the advice helped. I know I need to go easy on him and I know he's hurting ( my dad )
Comment