How many of u here are Divorcing or Divorced

[prinzeza87]

and how is it going or was your divorce process ?

ill be divorcing my ex soon (hopefully) we're just waiting for some legal stuff to be solved n then do the final step.
i've heard most of divorced people that it is a hard process on all aspects. i think it depends on each one's situation.
in my case i think its gonna be very hard and my ex will make it very difficult with out daughter's share custody (mostly because he's kinda obsessed with me, even though i heard of him having a girlfriend o seeing girls) He knows that i've been with a man (he has no idea who my SO is, just that he's a military man) n he hates that fact and makes it worse since he's got some totally wrong thinking of the military and believes that all men in it are mentally sick, stupid n are mean.
i dont ever argue with him because to him im always wrong (he's such of a close mind) and his ways are better/correct than mine, i just let him talk all the crap he wants (that makes him even more furious ) and then i move forward.
i might not know what await us on the coming divorce but im ready and mentally prepared for it and more having my SO by mi side

I'd like to read your experiences and find some good helpful tips

[Dezface]

I'm in the process of a divorce. I already filed and will be filing for my default judgement next week. For me it's been fairly smooth. My ex and I filled everything out together and are not fighting about anything. It helps that we don't have kids.

My SO is also in the process. His is taking longer to move even though they split up long before me and my ex did. However, relatively speaking, his has been mostly trouble free as well.

As long as you're mentally prepared for what's ahead you'll get through it. Good luck!

[Adamyna]

I am in the middle of a divorce as well. I just started the paperwork and I'm not sure that my ex is going to sign. He has no idea about my SO, and I plan on keeping it that way.

[Moon]

I'm twice divorced. The first one was difficult, my ex wouldn't sign off on the papers and drug it out. It took A LOT of begging and pleading, and I can't believe he actually did it, especially since he stalked me for about three years after. He did some other evil things too, but no need to go into that here. You know, we started dating when I was 16, got married at 21, and divorced at 24. In all those years, I never had any idea he was such a psycho.

The second was relatively quick and easy, I lost quite a bit of money, but it was a small price to pay for getting rid of him. We had no children together though, which makes things much easier.

Divorce is never easy, it's a painful road, but it's a road that has an end. Just stay strong, stand up for yourself, and remember that it's a temporary situation.

[temporaryuser]

here in NC you have to be seperated for 1 year and 1 day before you can even file for divorce. it sucks! My ex moved in with his girlfriend 2 weeks after we split up. I didnt know that he was even seeing her - assuming he was since he moved in so quickly.
That isnt why we split - it was years of him not wanting to parent his now 18 yo drop out of high school, unemployeed pregnant daughter that broke us up.
he didnt initiate or pay for any part of the divorce - all out of my pocket. Thats been the hardest part for me - the finances. he left me the huse (and mortgage), plus the other bills that go along with it.
I went with a mediator instead of a lawyer - much cheaper. he wasnt going to contest the divorce, so why spend thousands of dollars on a lawyer. The mediator wrote up all the paperwork, then i had to go to the courthouse and file them.

[leonsfangirl]

My divorce was made absolute on the 31st of May this year, it took 18 months to get it done.

My ex was a pain, very reluctant to do the paperwork and at every opportunity would say it was all my fault.

Best advice... tell him to put EVERYTHING in writing via your lawyer, tell him not to contact you at all unless it is an emergency regarding your daughter. Get a formal agreement in place for visitation in place as soon as possible. My ex used to say whenever he didnt want to the children that "i didnt sign anything so i can do what i want" and it cause major delays because when he got a letter from my lawyer stating he needed to stick with what we agreed when we split he'd delay the divorce paperwork to spite me.
Hold your head high, do everything in writing and minimise your dealings and it'll go alot faster.

[notyourexgirlfriend]

The divorce part was easy. The custody (was only finalised a few weeks back and I obtained majority after almost 2 years of fighting for it) and property settlement (to be held next month) have been the hard parts. We're not currently on talking terms unless its with regard to technical issues involving communication between my ex and our daughter.

[blueeyes79]

Here in NY you dont have to seperated for 1 year...You can just go for a divorce...Anyway, mine only took 9 months...I am lucky that my ex didnt give me any problems at all...we were very civil thoughout the whole thing and got along too...But I am much happier and so is he...