Moving in a week

[sewbama]

I signed my lease today. I am home for the week, and moving to Atlanta next Monday or Tuesday. For those who don't know, My SO and I have been living together for almost a year and a half after six months of LD at the start. I'm starting a PhD program in Atlanta this fall, so I'm moving. He only lives about 200 miles away. But both of us are going to be PhD students (aka busy). And currently he doesn't have a car (plan to change that as soon as student loans come in). It's going to be hard.

This week is also going to be hard. I have to pack up my stuff. And move it. And then leave. I can't imagine it. I just keep crying at random times. He was so sweet when I told him I'd moved in to my apartment. He said that our home has grown. He's really supportive. But I know this is killing him, too.

I know how to get through that first bit -- the adjustment period. Stay busy. But I won't HAVE to do anything. So I'll have to find ways to entertain myself. But how do I get through this part? How do I spend the last few days here, knowing that's exactly what they are? How do I not act like a lunatic just staring at him and crying all the time?

Any advice from those of you who've gone from CD to LD would be great. I'm really at a loss here.

[lyonsgirl]

My SO & I have gone from CD to LD twice now. (hopefully the next time we go CD it will be for good...) I won't lie to you, it does suck. You get so used to having the other person around, it's like you're always missing something. (I'm not trying to bring you down... it's how it was for me.)

As for this week, you have two options: you can focus on the fact it's your last week CD, or you can focus on the fact that you are still CD and will be making every effort to see each other as much as you can. I understand that you'll both be very busy, but maybe plan on spending the weekend together at least once a month. My SO & I focused on the fact that we were lucky enough to be able to spend that week together and made the most of it. We didn't change our routine a lot, but he helped me clean the apartment (since he moved into a smaller place & I moved to a different state) and we did our "normal" things like making dinner together and watching movies. And cuddling. Lots of cuddling.

You can't force yourself to be happy when you're not, though. I understand completely. My last days with my SO were hard - but we knew that we would see each other as soon as we could. We Skype as much as we can, and talk on the phone regularly. I know it's not the same, but you will adjust. Feel free to PM or VM me if you want to talk.

ETA: Where are you moving to in ATL? I used to live in the Smyrna/Vinings area before I moved to TX. My SO was in Marietta after I moved here, but he moved home to Indiana about 2 weeks ago.

[dukes2011]

I have gone from CD to LD multiple times seeing as my SO and I met in college. We were LD in the summers and now we're LD since I'm in grad school. I'll agree with you that it's definitely not easy. Sometimes I would get myself worked up and think about the worst scenarios coming true. Remember things are never as bad as you think they'll be. I cried at random times before I made the move from MD to NY for grad school knowing I'd be away from my SO and family, so you're not alone!

[sewbama]

Thanks, guys.

So we're trying to be pretty normal. We're going to have a date night on Friday. That's going to be hard. But other than that, his friend that lives a few doors down has been hanging out a lot (which is good), I've been packing. We're just going about our business. Just occasionally we have moments where we get sad. He says we shouldn't make it a big deal. Because it isn't. I just see it as a huge deal and trying to make it seem like nothing makes me think I'll end up with a huge wake up call after I leave. He is welcome to use that to make himself feel better, but it doesn't help me.

We talked a bit earlier today about it. I don't like that we have no idea how long the distance will last. It depends a lot on how school and job opportunities go. Anything from 9 months to many years. I said it could be six years, but he said we'd figure out something better by then. But nothing specific. Still, he seems confident we won't let it get that long. I guess that's a good thing. But we can't know what the sacrifices might be to make that happen.

For now, I'm supposed to be focusing one month at a time. We plan to do visits twice a month, which each of us going to see the other once a month. That is subject to change (more or less often) depending on how sad we get and how busy we are. The first one is scheduled for two weeks after I leave. So I know what I'm looking forward to. I thought that was important. I didn't want to leave having no idea when I'd be back.

Lyonsgirl -- I'm moving to Atlantic Station, which is just NW of midtown. I really like the neighborhood. I was very lucky to find an opening, and even luckier I can afford it! I'm excited to live somewhere I won't have to drive very often. I've been commuting an hour (one way) daily this year. I've always lived close enough to Atlanta to visit a lot, but never thought about living there. I'm so excited to get the opportunity.