Venting I guess?

[sagittariusgirl89]

So...I really couldnt think of a title for this post...all I know is that I feel like something is wrong with my relationship with my boyfriend...

Our 2 year is in 2 weeks and I feel like its just a struggle to stay positive anymore. My boyfriend told me today that he is sick of everything in his life. He said he is tired of pleasing everyone...now I know that I need to change some stuff. Lately Ive been rather grouchy and short with him. I need to work on that...

But I still feel like something is off. I feel like we are an old couple and that we just got into a routine. We never just laugh and joke around. It seems tense...I always feel like I have to say sorry because I feel like I make john miserable.

He said he NEEDS to do every 2 wks. He comes about once a week now. I know that 2 wks is better for him because he doesnt want to run his car into the ground and he needs to work and stuff...but 2 wks is soooooo hard to do for me. If there was a way to still stay close to john when he is 2 hours away then I could do the 2 wks...we dont have webcams because his laptop is rreally crappy. We talk and text on the phone off and on all day but its getting dull. He works almost every day too...oh idk

[Zephii]

Coming from me of all people this is going to sound a little odd, but I do think it's possible to work too hard/ put too much effort in. And there's also the getting into a rut thing...
Now, it's hard for me to overcome natural bias and be diplomatic with this one, but please understand that I mean well even if this comes across wrong... Two weeks is not very long, and free time is a very rare beast when you're working full time. If he says he needs to drop back to once a fortnight, then understand that he probably doesn't say it lightly - because he probably wants to be with you just as much as you want to be with him. Sometimes real life gets in the way of what we want to do.
It sounds to me like you're both bored of the relationship because you're waiting for a time when you can be together rather than enjoying what you have . If you make an effort to make your distance stuff actually enjoyable, not seeing each other every week wont matter.
I have to run, but wish you all the best.

[sagittariusgirl89]

Part of me thinks I should take a break from John...Its always tense with us now. I really feel like an old couple...

[Zephii]

I don't think taking breaks really works. I don't get what the point is really.
Besides, there are plenty of old couples and old relationships that DONT feel like that, so I figure temporarily giving up wont really get you there.

[sagittariusgirl89]

We had a talk last night. He is coming tonight so we are gonna talk some more...

[Bluestars]

I would not suggest taking a break, but I would suggest giving him a lot of space. It sounds like he needs some time to get his life figured out, and until he does, your relationship will not get any better imo. I agree with Zephii. Two weeks does sound reasonable in your situation, especially if every one week is putting a lot of pressure on him. What if you tried having a long distance date night every other week and visiting one another every other week.

Regardless, you both need to talk to one another about how you are feeling. If he tells you he needs more space, you need to give it to him. I say this because it sounds as though this is a recurring problem. If you are both getting bored with the relationship, discuss things you could do to make it more interesting. If you really want to be together, try finding a solution for your problems instead of just "taking a break."