Help, anxiety kills me !!

[striker87]

hey guys
anyway , i'm known that i think so much about things until i made problems of nothing, anyway, it's been about 10 days that my SO got back to her country, she has some problems there and because of this she doesn't give me much time , i know this is so normal, but what should i do to avoid negative thinking ? and how to get rid of this anxiety ? i really love her , he really loves me , but it's me who thinks a lot !!!
help me please

[dorabase93]

i don't know what you are really anxious about
if you're scared of her finding someone else or forgetting you, I'd say you gotta trust her a lot.
you can find a hobby and spend time with it while she's dealing with her problems. give her some space if you can't help her.or get some work done like cleaning your house, tidy up you room.show some love when you have a chance to talk. I'm sure it will work out. good luck.

[alittlemind]

I am a very anxious person. I think to much, sometimes making myself sick with worry. What helps me a lot in the beginning in just take deep breaths, and tell yourself that everything is okay, that everything will work out fine. I know this may be hard to do, but force yourself to think that everything is okay. If that doesn't work, writing what you are worried about really helps. When I write things down when I'm anxious, I often realize how unreasonable I am being and how I can fix what I am thinking. Write every little thing you are thinking, and read it over. Go through the things one by one and ask yourself why you are thinking this way. If you cannot come up with a good reason, cross it out, because you shouldn't be worrying about something that doesn't exist. Then, once you've asked yourself all of this, go through it again, this time ask yourself what you can do to fix the things still left on your list. Read it or sent it to your SO and they can help you figure it out. Make sure when you are discussing these things to be calm and mindful of her feelings as well. Hope everything works out for you!

[Brieasaurus]

What helps me a lot in the beginning in just take deep breaths, and tell yourself that everything is okay, that everything will work out fine. I know this may be hard to do, but force yourself to think that everything is okay. If that doesn't work, writing what you are worried about really helps. When I write things down when I'm anxious, I often realize how unreasonable I am being and how I can fix what I am thinking. Write every little thing you are thinking, and read it over. Go through the things one by one and ask yourself why you are thinking this way. If you cannot come up with a good reason, cross it out, because you shouldn't be worrying about something that doesn't exist. Then, once you've asked yourself all of this, go through it again, this time ask yourself what you can do to fix the things still left on your list. Read it or sent it to your SO and they can help you figure it out. Make sure when you are discussing these things to be calm and mindful of her feelings as well. Hope everything works out for you!

This exactly! I've often said this around here whenever someone asks for advice. It really helps. Plus, think good thoughts! Every time you get a bad thought just think of a good one and slowly, the good ones will naturally come instead of the bad ones.

[TerriW312]

I'm also a really anxious person. I worry about nothing or things that I (apparently) shouldn't be worrying about. I work myself into panic attacks over the silliest of things (not just relationship related). I find that identifying the source of all your anxieties can be helpful. My relationship anxieties stem from past relationships in which I was treated quite poorly and one relationship which was physically and emotionally abusive. Because of that I have trust issues, and don't really believe that someone could be with me and not hurt me. I just remind myself that Nathan is nothing like the guys who treated me badly and that's why I'm with him just think of why you're feeling this way and remember that it's not the same.

[tanaquil]

I have A LOT of anxiety, too -- even have to take medicine for it -- so I know where you're coming from completely. It's difficult to have trust in a person sometimes, especially when communication kind of goes down for a bit. But if you're sure that the other person loves you, then you shouldn't be worried about them cheating on you (: Maybe leave a note to them (email?) and say that you're looking out for them and are worried. It doesn't solve the problem A LOT but it helps to know that they'll read it and you can get some of the pressure off your chest.

Try to keep yourself busy, too! That way you'll have your mind completly absorbed in something for at least a little bit. (:

This stuff is A LOT easier said than done, believe this from someone who has anxiety AND trust issues, but it's the only thing you can do until things settle. All the best!

[striker87]

thank you so much guys for your help , i really appreciate that , and i think that i'm a person that needs attention from time to time , and of course a trust issue since my last EXs have hurt me while i was always the faithful one , in fact , my SO now is a really kind , nice , smart , loving girl , she tries her best to please me , but in the contrary , i know that i'm sometime so hard to deal with , but in my inner , i just want her beside me !
now , what i really need is some advices , or things that may help me to restore the trust and to positively think about the future .
thank you a lot !