Need Advice About This Please

[HoldMeImAFermata]

Hey peoples so my girlfriend and I have been dating for 5 Months now she lives in CT and I live in NY. I love her to pieces and things are great I couldn't ask for a more sensitive, caring, romantic girl she's the best thing that happened to me. We text every day for as many hours as possible but I always enjoy Skyping way more whenever we can. The only issues I have is most of the time when we Skype not always but like 90% of the time she's with a friend or two when were video chatting and they distract her. What happens is she ends up talking to them a lot and not paying much attention to me. Like for example last night she was at her friends house and for about the first 20 minutes of our conversation she was studying with her friend for an upcoming test in school. Then she talked to me for like 10 minutes but then she took out her phone bc she just figured out how to download apps on her smart phone so she got completely pre-occupied with that plus the fact that she was tired she wasn't contributing anything to the conversation. So I tried everything to keep her talking to me even looked up ice breaker questions but every time I asked her something she gave like a one sentence answer. Don't get the wrong idea I'm not trying to be needy or ungrateful its just I would really prefer she do that stuff when were not sky ping I'm fine with her saying when were texting hey I gotta go do some stuff so I'll talk to you like in an hour or two and we can Skype tonight, and do all that stuff she wants to do then. And then later she'll be done and I can actually talk to her. Also I don't mind her being around friends just as long as she doesn't completely ignore me. So my question is how to approach this topic with her in a nice way so I can remedy the situation? Do you think I'm asking too much?

[snow_girl]

Have you brought this up with her? She can't fix what she is doing if she doesn't know it is a problem.

[Black_Halloween]

HI! im from CT! Hahaha :P Have you talked to her about it? I think it great that she wants to share you with her friends but its not cool that they're just ignoring you .

[Romeo s Juliet]

I'm not trying to be needy or ungrateful its just I would really prefer she do that stuff when were not sky ping I'm fine with her saying when were texting hey I gotta go do some stuff so I'll talk to you like in an hour or two and we can Skype tonight, and do all that stuff she wants to do then. And then later she'll be done and I can actually talk to her. Also I don't mind her being around friends just as long as she doesn't completely ignore me.

you should tell her this ^^^^
tell it to her the way you feel in a calm way. make sure you dont tell it to her in a complaining tone, be calm and gentel and tell this she will understand, and then you guys can work it out
good luck

[HoldMeImAFermata]

Thank you all for the input

[D.4C]

you should prolly tell her how you feel...and tell her you wanna make time for just the two of you..tell her how important it is to you...i don't really think you are asking too much at all...just remember...she does need to have some time to do stuff with her friends and that....

[AABRCL05]

You need to just talk to her about it...she may not even realize that she is doing that. Maybe you guys could make a date night once a week- so that it is just you and her on skype. Then you have her attention and she doesnt drift off into different conversations.

[Biddlybiddlybombop]

Just talk to her. Organise times and days that you two can talk, uninterrupted, and then use the time inbetween chats to do your stuff - studying, friends, even just personal time to relax.
I think if you're chatting all the time, you're probably missing out on living the other parts of your life properly. Sounds dramatic, but bear with me. If I'm going to hang out with some friends, and it interferes with time I'd spend with my SO, I tell my SO, and we talk a different time. This means that I can focus not only on him fully when we talk, but my friends fully when I'm with them.
Remember not to forget how to live your own life because what you want to do is wait by the computer/phone because you want to hear from your SO.

[Carenza LaRue]

I think you should write her a snail mail love letter..... !!!

makes it more personal, you make her see you put effort in it AND it gives you time to think about what you want to say to her.... because it's really something you should discuss.
she might not be aware that she is giving you a feeling of being ignored.....so if you express your feelings about that in a lovely letter..... I think she will get the message..

add a bit humour too.... keep it light..... and see where it goes...

you'll do fine..... trust me

good luck!

[artgrl808]

From a public viewpoint, it seems as if she doesn't realize it's a problem! You should bring it up humorously...or straight. Either way you have to address this as a problem. It's my SO's pet peeve when people start playing with their phones, electronics, etc...when they could be spending quality time with loved ones. Problems like these need to dealt with with a tone that comes across as serious. Humor does help, but it may make it seem a little too relaxed and she may not take it seriously. Serious talks build understanding, and eventually trust.

Best of luck!~

[HoldMeImAFermata]

I again very much appreciate all the advice that was given. Fortunately she is doing better at paying more attention to me in our skype/phone conversations without me talking to her, but I will keep all those ideas in mind for the future. Thank you all