So, I'm back

[cymlee]

I didn't ever think I would be back after my last post about our breakup. The only way I can describe the way things have worked out is that what is meant to be will be. You don't just stop loving someone because you get upset, because true love is unconditional. However, sometimes people need to be apart to realize just have how much they mean to one another.

A bit has changed in the four months since I last posted. I moved to Detroit for a job with City Year, which has been a great thing because it's helped our communication a lot. I think one of our big issues was always communication, when he was busy I was free and I always wanted to hear from him even when I knew he couldn't talk. Now that we're both working, there's a routine in place. We text each other good morning, we text during my lunch break and when I'm home for the day/whenever he gets off we do the same or talk over the phone. We made things official last night. We've even discussed him possibly moving to Detroit to close the distance in the very near future.

My advice to anyone who wants reconciliation to happen is to not rush things. If things are meant to be they will come together, but you have to be patient, which may mean spending more time to working on yourself or hanging with friends and family. You don't have to give up, but you do have to let things happen its own time.

[Verojoon]

I'm happy for you! I also had a break up and some months apart this summer... and it put us in a position where we communicate so much better now!

[summerstillhere]

great story. im happy for both of you.

i broke up last week (and still sad about it).
one of the reason is because of the distance.

i find your story inspiring because i still love him and i hope he feels the same too because he told me he will never forget me and he wanna stay friends. but im scared that i will get hurt even more so i stop contact with him for a while until i think i can talk to him again.

may I ask, what did you do after the break up?

[Honour]

I never thought my other half and I would speak again after what transpired this summer, however we now are in contact again and in a relationship again after we fell in all over again! Thanks for sharing for your story

[cymlee]

After the breakup I really tried my best to give him. We got into an argument, which is what caused the breakup and he was still angry about it in the days and weeks after. I found that when I tried to get him to talk to resolve the issue when he was still angry, things didn't go well. I waited for him to contact me first and as we became more comfortable talking to each other again, we were able to think more clearly and figure out the best way to resolve the conflict we had and how to avoid ever returning to that point. We didn't rush into getting back together and the 4 months we spent as unofficial allowed us to really realize how stupid the argument we had was and that we truly loved each other and wanted to be together even through thick and thin.

My ultimate advice to you is don't contact him, because he probably needs more time to sort through things. When he's ready he will talk and if he wants to resolve things he will make the effort. I hope everything works well for you. Feel free to message me if you want to talk anymore.

[cymlee]

I thought the same thing. I'm happy things have worked out for you and your other half.

[summerstillhere]

i didnt contact him after he sent the email saying that he's sick of internet and the distance. i keep remembering what he said in the email and thats why i cant contact him. its been a week now.
and last weekend he sent me emails, messages just being friendly but i cant reply acting like nothing happened between us.

I'm scared if i ignore him longer he will forget me and find someone else plus, we're in LD its easier for him to replace me. i still love him.
and we have planned for our vacation few months ago ;(
so I dont know whats the status for our vacation.

[cymlee]

If he loves you enough to try and make things work, he won't forget you or move onto someone else. Has he ever expressed that he loves you? At this point I would continue with no contact because I know it hurts to try and be friends with someone you still love. Maybe he'll bring up the vacation and that will give the two of you an opportunity to discuss some other things as well.

[summerstillhere]

If he loves you enough to try and make things work, he won't forget you or move onto someone else. Has he ever expressed that he loves you? At this point I would continue with no contact because I know it hurts to try and be friends with someone you still love. Maybe he'll bring up the vacation and that will give the two of you an opportunity to discuss some other things as well.

yes he expressed his love many times when we first got in long distance. he was so sad because of it. and that time we were so busy planning when can we meet each other again. but now after almost 5months being far he seems to gv up on us. i just hope that he really love me a lot that he will try to work it with me because of course im willing to do this long distance. and im willing to go visit him. i mean yea of course i hv to save money for the trip but i dont hv problem for that.
ohh i wish i hv magical power that can bring me there and hug him

[Andi]

Awwww. that is so good to hear. Me and my SO are on the rocks big time. i have hopes that we can work it out. at least i see that it is possible.