How often do you visit?

[Paris]

My bf leaves Tuesday for Italy for 3 years and we are both fine with it. We discussed our concerns this weekend and honestly what we are both concerned about we really shouldn't be concerned about. I feel much better and I hope he does as well with his concern. Now I am going there in Nov/Dec to see him for 3wks. I plan on going every 3-4 months after that for a week or 2, more than likely just a week after that. My mother really irritated me by giving me crap for going "so much" as she put it. I mean if he lived here and was only 3 hrs or even driving distance I would go every month! He is in Italy! I think the time we have talked about is fine. He can't come here and I have the open schedule to go there when I want and I can afford it so why to some is this too much? We are still in a relationship and I don't care how many oceans or miles are between us I will do my best to see him when I can.

So I was wondering for those that travel long distances or have SO in other countries how often do you go see them and is 4 times a year "too much?" IMO it's not enough! It's only 3 years and to me it's not a big deal, there are plenty of ways for us to stay in touch and still be together. We discussed all this this past weekend and he made no negative comment about me coming this much. He will have his own place and I will stay with him, really no difference than if he were still going to be in the US.

[Bluestars]

I think you should just ignore your mom in this situation. My mom sometimes has the same attitude when it comes to me visiting my SO. My SO and I used to see each other once a month (we live around 800 miles apart, which is a twelve hour drive, so we mostly fly to see one another now) Now that money is a little bit tighter, that is not an option anymore, so now we will have had two months between our next visit, which will probably become the new norm.

If you can afford every four months, then I say go for it. I believe you should see your SO as often as money and your schedule permits I wish we could see each other once a week but that is not possible!

[Reckless_Anarchy]

That's not visting "too much".And me and my SO vist each other about 2 times a month...Although, it'll probally be harder once I'm back in school and I'm working...So we'll see from there how it goes

[NaNi]

I also don't think that it's too much. I would love to be able to see my SO more often. We are only able to visit once or twice a year.

[Swederica]

Absolutely not too much. I would and are taking every oppurtunity to visit her, too bad i haven't succeeded. Yet

Go for it. Wish i had your money haha. But really go there as others have said as often as you can

[elina]

Not too much at all, if you have the money, I say gooooo and see him as often as you can ♥ I know I would.. if I/we had more time hah.

We see each other every 1-3 months, depends when we can get time off work/school. Once a month is awesome but we won't always get to see each other that often. We're gonna try hard to keep it less than 3 months though, we had to wait that long once and it was kinda killing us x)

[folclor]

I agree that you should ignore your mom on this. I only get to go about once every 6 months. ^^;; So 4 times a year isn't over doing it

[Darth_Taco]

I do it about once a month or every two months for a few days. Longest has been about 5 or 6 days. It's a 6 hour drive, or up to 11 hours on freaking Greyhound, I'm handicap meaning I can't handle sitting too long, and I can't stay at his house because I can't share a bed with his (his grandma is a conservative Catholic :P) and hotel is $55 per day! Screw him, I don't love him that much D:<! Actually, we visit plenty for a 300 mile distance :P.

[Paris]

Thanks for the replies. I think 4 times is too little but I can deal with it no problem. I will enjoy every trip I have with him and it will always give me something to look forward to.

Also I don't have money for those who think that lol, I just have a job that allows me to make decent money where I make my own schedule. When I knew he was going to be moving to Italy I budgeted a certain amount of money to be put away a week in a separate account just for my trips to see him. I figured out the cost of airfare for the entire time he is gone and I will have that saved up within a year. I will be visiting the longest this Nov/Dec or possibly Dec/Jan, I might change it so I can be with him for the holidays, it all depends on his schedule. Each visit after that wont be as long. I might do one really long one towards this time next year but soon my job will change and I won't have the freedom to go as much. I would move there if he asked and only if he asked and he knows it. We have talked about it and he has made comments about me being there so one never knows what could happen.

My mother is the only person in my life who is negative. She is like this with anyone I am with but my bf now is nothing like the idiots I dated before. She thinks me waiting for him to come back is stupid and that I shouldnt "run" to him in another country..She is very dramatic lol I don't understand why she is like this but she is the only person giving me negative feedback on my relationship. Others have made comments but they don't say anymore after I tell them to mind their own business. Honesly most people I know think it's crazy I am with him and that I am going to see him so often in Italy. My ex lived in another state and I drove 10hrs every month to see him. I stayed a week each time so it's not a big deal flying to see my current bf every 3-4 months, heck it's cheaper honestly!

I love this man very much and I am not going to let anyone put ideas in my head, which was a problem with the last LDR I had. I don't know anyone who really truly understands having a LDR so when I get worried about things they don't understand, where other in LDR do. Thanks for the replies...sorry I rambled lol I'm still new to all of this on here. I'm not use to talking to strangers about my life, let alone my relationship.

[Tanja]

My bf leaves Tuesday for Italy for 3 years and we are both fine with it. We discussed our concerns this weekend and honestly what we are both concerned about we really shouldn't be concerned about. I feel much better and I hope he does as well with his concern. Now I am going there in Nov/Dec to see him for 3wks. I plan on going every 3-4 months after that for a week or 2, more than likely just a week after that. My mother really irritated me by giving me crap for going "so much" as she put it. I mean if he lived here and was only 3 hrs or even driving distance I would go every month! He is in Italy! I think the time we have talked about is fine. He can't come here and I have the open schedule to go there when I want and I can afford it so why to some is this too much? We are still in a relationship and I don't care how many oceans or miles are between us I will do my best to see him when I can.

So I was wondering for those that travel long distances or have SO in other countries how often do you go see them and is 4 times a year "too much?" IMO it's not enough! It's only 3 years and to me it's not a big deal, there are plenty of ways for us to stay in touch and still be together. We discussed all this this past weekend and he made no negative comment about me coming this much. He will have his own place and I will stay with him, really no difference than if he were still going to be in the US.

4 times a year is not enough! We see each other about that much and it's always hard for us to stay apart for some 3-4 months in a row... If you have the money and the time then go see him as much as you can! It's your relationship and life, not your mum's.

Not too much at all, if you have the money, I say gooooo and see him as often as you can ♥ I know I would.. if I/we had more time hah.

We see each other every 1-3 months, depends when we can get time off work/school. Once a month is awesome but we won't always get to see each other that often. We're gonna try hard to keep it less than 3 months though, we had to wait that long once and it was kinda killing us x)

Awwwwww I'm jealous, lol, I wish I could see Andy once a month! ♥

[Riyko]

I see my guy every other month because I fly through my dad (who works for the airlines) otherwise I wouldn't be able to see him as much.