My SO needs help

[Shepard-Fowkes]

My SO's posted on here before about his dad. https://members.lovingfromadistance....-being-at-home The tl;dr of that thread: his dad's abusive, he felt trapped and unsafe at home. Well, yesterday his father crossed a line that I knew he was capable of but didn't think he'd ever do.

Yesterday, during an argument, my SO was physically assaulted by his dad, pushed and pinned down. My SO's arm got hurt in the process, I think it's going to bruise pretty badly. He packed a small bag with all his sentimental items and important electronics and left. His dad said that if he left he'd never speak to him again and he'd never be allowed back home again. But he left anyway. And he has no intention of coming back, he doesn't feel safe at home and he's honestly right not to. Now his family's trying to manipulate him into coming back and said some awful things to him.

He's at a friend's house right now, but he can only stay a few days. He's unemployed and has no savings. He's been sending CVs left and right for months and now he's having to work triple hard, but even if he gets a call tomorrow, he still wouldn't have enough for a place to stay. He doesn't even have clothes other than the ones he left with. He only has 26 quid on him.

Come the weekend, my SO isn't going to have a place to stay. He's exploring all of his avenues. There's programs and things that could help him get a place, but he'd still have to pay for a deposit and a couple months' rent. He's trying to dig up money any way he can but he's still coming up short. His only other friend, he'd have to get to by train and that would wipe out half his money. A shelter is honestly his last possible option.

Guys, he needs help. He lives in England, West Midlands specifically, if you have a couch he could crash on a couple nights. Or... I hate asking for money, but. If you can, PM me and I'll send you his PayPal link. If you're willing but hesitant, PM me and we'll figure out some way to show you he's truly in need. He'd be able to pay anything back in about a month, which is when his next unemployment payment comes in. Any little bit would help.

I'm so scared.

[Tooki]

Has he tried to get in touch with other family members?

[Shepard-Fowkes]

Has he tried to get in touch with other family members?

He doesn't have contact with the rest of his family. They aren't very close at all, he really is on his own :/

[snow_girl]

Where in the UK more specifically? If its not too far I can ask my SO if he'd be okay with him there a couple nights?

[Shepard-Fowkes]

Where in the UK more specifically? If its not too far I can ask my SO if he'd be okay with him there a couple nights?

He lives in Stourbridge, thank you for your help <3

[Jezah]

Oh wow, I am so sorry. HBB went through something similar, his dad was always trying to destroy our relationship by taking his computer power cord, interrupting us constantly when we would talk and even making him cancel already purchased plane tickets to visit. However, his father never got physical and HBB recently was able to move out. HBB is in the UK but he is in York, which is a bit north of where your SO is. Plus, they are moving soon anyways into a new house so its a bit of a mess.

I suggest he look into employment agencies in the area, HBB was having a awful time finding a job until he went to a employment agency who found him a job quick. Yes it was only manual labor job but its work.

Best of luck *hugs*

[snow_girl]

Oh that is further then I thought. We are basically in London, i'm not sure he would want to spend his £25 on that.

[Shepard-Fowkes]

Oh that is further then I thought. We are basically in London, i'm not sure he would want to spend his £25 on that.

Probably not lol, thank you for trying though, it really does mean a lot.

[redapple]

this is probably your best bet https://england.shelter.org.uk/get_a...on_if_homeless not knowing the area i cant be of much more help sorry! good luck!

[ThePiedPiper]

He lives in Stourbridge, thank you for your help <3

this is probably your best bet not knowing the area i cant be of much more help sorry! good luck!

She mentioned it right there. Not meaning to be snarky, but if that helps you provide another resource, simply wanted to point it out.

[redapple]

Depends on individual councils though, as far as i'm aware from very limited work with my university you have to apply before they will tell you if they have any space. Could be the Stourbridge has no space whats so ever or could be they will be able to sort him a room tonight but he's have to get in touch to find out. Not an ideal system granted!

However... a bit more of a rummage say that there a winter homeless centre last year at the YMCA in Henwick Road, stourbridge. However i cant find anything saying whether its there again this year. however i think they might be running it under a different name.

I found these:
Foyer Project
Offers accommodation for homeless local young people and vulnerable adults
☎ 01905 423197
www.ymcaworcester.org.uk/stay-safe.htm
Henwick Rd, Worcester, WR2 5NS

Maggs Day Centre

St Paul’s Hostel
Homeless hostel
☎ 01905 723729
www.stpaulshostel.co.uk
Tallow Hill, Worcester, WR5 1DB
South Worcestershire
Nightstop

Help for young, single homeless people aged 16-25
☎ 01684 579579
Festival Housing Group,
Partnership House, Grove Wood
Road, Malvern Link, WR14 1GD

https://www.homelessuk.org/details.asp?id=UK19258 i think is stourbridges local council, if not this website will let him search for the local council. each council has to have a 24hr emergency contact. You can find it on this page.

I hope this is of some help!

[Jezah]

She mentioned it right there. Not meaning to be snarky, but if that helps you provide another resource, simply wanted to point it out.

I think she meant "not knowing the area personally" not "I don't know where he is".....

[redapple]

ok im stopping looking now but get him to look in kiddermister and Birmingham too. They'll be able to transfer where he goes to sign on to get his job seekers if thats a concern of his. Good luck!

[ThePiedPiper]

I think she meant "not knowing the area personally" not "I don't know where he is".....

I misunderstood. As I said, I didn't mean it to be snarky. I was pointing it out in case it helped redapple provide more valuable resources. Since I don't have a SO in the UK and do not live in the UK, I don't know the resources myself and thought maybe it would help redapple provide more specific services.

Thank you red. <3

[redapple]

this seems closer if thats an issue

https://www.homelessuk.org/details.asp?id=HO1007070

one thing I would say is if he's serious about not going back home then its really hard to keep yourself going and improve your life by living benefit to benefit payment or hopefully pay check to pay check when your starting on very little to nothing. Getting two rent cheques (deposit + rent) is going to take some time. It might feel like a bit of a kick to his pride to go into housing, and its not going to be amazing granted, but it might help him get a bit more set up rather than crashing sofa to sofa. Often they will help with jobs and interviews ect. and theyll give him time to get sorted with accommodation and a job before leaving (good ones this is!)

so i know you said shelters as a last resort but realistically if he isn't going to go home, he's unemployed and has nowhere else that can give him a bed then it looks like it could be his best option.