LDR Trending?

[rubydissolution]

I've been meaning to post this thread for a while bc as I usually am, just curious.

I've noticed lately that a lot of people break up with someone in an LDR and bounce right back and get back into another one. I know personally when I ended my LDR, I told myself never again. I couldn't go through it. So, when I started dating again, I searched CD and found someone CD.

So I was wondering what makes people who have done the LDR thing go back for another? and what makes some of us go CD.

[snow_girl]

An increase in online dating/online interactions maybe have something to do with it. No one plans LDRs but if you are constantly online it seems only logical that you might meet someone in another city you connect with.

[eveningsky]

I never wanted to be in an LDR. The first LDR I was in was with my ex because he joined the military. After that, I was in two other short-distance LDRs with exes due to being in university. During the last few times I was single, I always felt like there was someone out there who really would be my ideal ("soul") mate but he wasn't anywhere close to me. I thought about how populated the world is and wondered where he could possibly be. Maybe it's that kind of thinking that gets people in LDRs again after already being in one?
Of course, I ended up meeting my SO while studying abroad...even after looking online for a while (just to see who was out there).

[Kiyama]

I agree with Snow_girl and I also think it's the generation we live in. People tend to move around a lot more so you have to be flexible. I went to uni for six years and it was clear from the start for me and my back then boyfriend that I would spend a year abroad. So this isn't my first ldr either. It is the situation that requires it and I know so many people who have been spent a certain time of their relationship ld.

[Dezface]

I agree that a lot has to do with the internet. A record number of people are meeting online. And it's much easier to keep in touch now than it used to be which makes a LDR not as daunting as it once was.

[Sora1101]

For me it's because I can't really talk to guys outside of the comfort of the internet where I can really be myself and it seems guys only find me dateable online so that's where it stemmed from for me although none of my other LDRs were serious at all I never met anyone other than my SO.

[Bex2804]

With mine, I fell in love with a guy who came to my town for a educational visit, and we liked each other too much to let the distance get in the way

[ThePiedPiper]

I was in one LDR prior to my ex/most recent one and while I have resolved not to do it again, I feel like a huge part of it was the fact that was where I was socialising, was online. Ironically, I met both on the same site (met the first ex a lot later than the second). There was a lot that I was dealing with at the time, was struggling with significant levels of depression and anxiety, did not spend much time at school seeing as I went to a charter school which involved a lot of independent study, and devoted most of my time to one or two online sites, which narrowed my social access. So I would agree that it has to do with the rising popularity of the internet as a social networking tool, not only for keeping in touch with people you know, but as a catalyst for meeting new ones. It is because of this, however, that I am making a point to get out there and try and meet people more traditionally and face-to-face. I'm not looking for a partner at this time, but I'm looking for ways to become actively involved in meeting new people and making new friends that does not involve being primarily on the internet.

[Moon]

If you do a good deal of your socializing online, you probably will be in many LDR's, that's kind of inevitable. For me, my last few relationships started through work, because that's where I usually am. It just so happens that this time, my co-worker lives in Helsinki I think LDR's are only going to become more and more common now that the internet is such an integral part of everyone's lives, that's inevitable too. It also means that they'll become less taboo and be seen as pretty normal as time goes by, the world has become incredibly smaller in the last 15 years, which, IMHO, is a great thing!

[Chris516]

Love trumps distance, for those that get into another LDR. Distance trumps love, for those that refuse to get into another LDR.

[rubydissolution]

Love trumps distance, for those that get into another LDR. Distance trumps love, for those that refuse to get into another LDR.

Well yes, I understand the basic dynamics. But, being in an LDR is extremely painful, lonely and hard and not very cost effective lol. Knowing this, having been in an LDR its just hard for me to say I'd ever do it again. I'm sure if I found the man of my dreams I'd give it a shot. But the last one messed me up so badly, and it wasn't just the distance. So, for me, distance didn't trump love. My ex bf betraying my trust and being a douchebag trumped love.