Dreams and their influence on your relationship

[LadyMarchHare]

This might sound a bit silly but bear with me.

I'm sure we all dream about our SOs here and there, maybe constantly, maybe just a couple times, whatever. Maybe they're good dreams like you two having a picnic or bad ones. Good or bad, do your dreams influence how you feel about the relationship? Like say you dream about being real close to them, does it make you ache to be with them and depress you or do you feel like, through that dream, you're getting closer to them and act accordingly awake? Or, when you have bad dreams like them getting hurt or leaving you, do you feel yourself become paranoid about them and wonder if maybe something really is wrong?

Last night, I didn't sleep too well despite getting 6 hours. I knew I had dreams about my SO but I couldn't remember any until later when I remembered I dreamt he had asked me to get on webcam (which is a rarity since we only do this when he has days off) and proceeded to break up with me, I don't remember the reason. I've had bad dreams involving him before and I find I always wake up and want to break his phone by calling it until he picks up just to see if he's alright or mad at me. Of course, I suffer from clinical paranoia so I suppose that's merely me. Even today I'm a bit worried but of course I can't call him and texting him about it while he's working's pretty silly.

I was just merely wondering if this happens to anyone else.

[NaNi]

Whenever I dream about my SO it's either that she's leaving me or that we break up. I even had a dream where she died and I just cried and cried and felt terrible after waking up; my eyes filled up too. She had the same dream. We talked about it and it's probably because we're just scared of losing each other. Which is true. In my case anyway. I never feel like anything is wrong though. We're happy as we can be and I know that she would never leave me. The dreams are still annoying though.

[Caitlin2009]

Well I always have dreams about Denise and i know i do whether i remember them or not. The one's i do remember i've had the occasional dream about her finding someone else and leaving me which ive told her about and she knows im worried about that and to quote her "thats never gonna happen! i keep telling you that, your stuck with me woman!" lmao, i mostly always get really good dreams about her, some of which we actually share and she'll get the same ones and sometimes remember as well

[DropkickDisco]

I have had insane amounts of nightmares about Brian for a long, long time. I can only remember a handful of times I've ever had actually HAPPY dreams about him. it really frustrates him too because it makes me paranoid as all hell.

[folclor]

I dream a lot about Alex. Sometimes good, sometimes bad, sometimes just cuddle. *shrugs* I tell him all of the dreams, though, and usually get a good response.

[Riyko]

I've had my fair share of good and bad dreams about my SO, i've had dreams where he's cheated on me, left me or died. Then i've had the dreams where he's asked me to marry him, we had kids ect. last night I was dreaming about him well he actually called me at 7am to see how i'm doing lol.

[Darth_Taco]

I tend to have really absurd dreams about him. For example, around 2 or 3 nights ago I had a really weird one where he told me that he was no longer happy with any vagina, but he didn't feel gay. He wanted to stop having sex except for maybe once or twice a year to stop my bitching. I woke up, and laughed really hard at the stupid thought. Later that nigh I asked him if this was plausible by any means. If only I could've seen his face. Probably would've given me that "the fuck?" look I love so much :'D. Anyway, he just plainly responded "Hell no! I like sex too much. There's something wrong with you." I know there is :P. They get stupider @_@. My dreams mainly affect what stupid question I ask him that day. We get a good laugh out of my subconscious.

[werekat]

I often have dreams of cheating on my partner. Not only with my current SO but with past boyfriends as well.
Generally I'm cheating with another good male friend of mine, but I feel like that's just my mind filling in the blanks with someone I know well, as I wouldn't even contemplate it in real life. Recently I had a dream that I cheated on him with this friends (who also dated my best friend), and everyone saw it happen and knew and judged me for it as I grappled with whether or not to tell my SO. Generally I want to tell him but the dreams are heartbreaking because obviously I don't want to lose him.

I don't tell Daniel usually when I have dreams like this, because I know right now, since we are fresh into the LDR, he's especially worried about something like this happening. Although I have told a past boyfriend about a similar dream and he took it well and admitted he'd had a similar dream as well!

I never take my dreams to mean a reflection of my deepest desires, because usually I see them as reflections of my deepest fears. I guess my mind's way of prepping itself just in case the unthinkable were to happen.

I also had a dream the other night where we were fishing together and then I fell into the river and it turned into mud, slowly sucking my under as he tried to pull me out. I'm not sure what the symbolism of this could be, but I'm glad he was there to try and save me.

[Puramu]

I constantly have dreams with my SO in them. They're not necessarily about him, he's just there. I also always dream that he lives just right up the street from me. I guess my brain sees my situation and tries to resolve it in the dream world. I really wish that were true.

But the only 'bad' dream I had about him was that I made him cry. I don't remember what I did, all I remember was him crying and knowing it was my fault. I was a bit shaken for a bit, but I realized it was a dream. Yet, I never want that to come true, so I guess the dream taught me that if I want to avoid that happening I have to be a better girlfriend, I'm sure I was doing something wrong at the time. Dreams have a weird way of telling you things.

[LadyMarchHare]

@werekat: Dreams tend to use faces of people you've seen or are most comfortable with. I've read that even 'strangers' in your dreams are people you have seen while awake, you just don't consciously remember them. So yeah it's most likely not your desire for said person but for the fact it's the face your mind conjures up when you enter the dream. Still I guess they're pretty scary to have since it can make you question your own feelings.

[Zephii]

Sometimes I can't tell if I dreampt something or if it actually happened, especially when I first wake up. When I first wake up realistic dreams often feel like a memory of something that happened yesterday or last week.
Once I had a dream that Obi cheated on me and that night we were sleeping on skype together. When he stirred and thus woke me I flooded him with a bit of abuse that was uncalled for. I guess he thought I was still fully asleep, and as it was early my time we both went back to sleep. But he was very wary of me when we finally woke up fully, and I couldn't stop apologising when I remembered what I'd done.

I have a lot of bad dreams about everything though.

Generally Obi is in all my dreams, but as an inactive part. He's there in the same way I am, "standing" beside me but not always with an active part to play.

[Caity]

I don't often remember my dreams at all. I know my SO has lots of dreams about us. Normally they're good but sometimes he wakes up missing me loads or hugging his pillow wishing it was me so they do affect our relationship. My SO had a bad dream last night too about me and him, though he wouldn't tell me what it was this morning, and he hadn't been able to sleep much afterwards. Just had to tell him it was only a dream and that nothing bad is going to happen =).

[Caitlin2009]

I often have dreams of cheating on my partner. Not only with my current SO but with past boyfriends as well.
Generally I'm cheating with another good male friend of mine, but I feel like that's just my mind filling in the blanks with someone I know well, as I wouldn't even contemplate it in real life. Recently I had a dream that I cheated on him with this friends (who also dated my best friend), and everyone saw it happen and knew and judged me for it as I grappled with whether or not to tell my SO. Generally I want to tell him but the dreams are heartbreaking because obviously I don't want to lose him.

I don't tell Daniel usually when I have dreams like this, because I know right now, since we are fresh into the LDR, he's especially worried about something like this happening. Although I have told a past boyfriend about a similar dream and he took it well and admitted he'd had a similar dream as well!

I never take my dreams to mean a reflection of my deepest desires, because usually I see them as reflections of my deepest fears. I guess my mind's way of prepping itself just in case the unthinkable were to happen.

I also had a dream the other night where we were fishing together and then I fell into the river and it turned into mud, slowly sucking my under as he tried to pull me out. I'm not sure what the symbolism of this could be, but I'm glad he was there to try and save me.

@werekat: Dreams tend to use faces of people you've seen or are most comfortable with. I've read that even 'strangers' in your dreams are people you have seen while awake, you just don't consciously remember them. So yeah it's most likely not your desire for said person but for the fact it's the face your mind conjures up when you enter the dream. Still I guess they're pretty scary to have since it can make you question your own feelings.

Mmmhmm i mean i get plenty of random dream people including having sex with them, i tell these dreams to Denise as well who knows just because your dreaming about another person like that it doesnt mean anything but you probably needing sex lol.

[xsomanymilesx]

i always dream about my boyfriend, and its always about us being together and doing fun stuff
i either wake up really happy that i had at least a dreams worth of what life could be like ... or completely depressed that im alone and hes so far away. and i jsut want to curl back up and go to sleep to get my dream back
rarely ive had dreams that something bad happened to him or we broke up, and i wake up crying which is quite distressing
it does have an impact on the relationship - like after a dream i may be needier when we talk or more content telling him about it, it also opens up for conversation topics too.
so yea, i guess dreams do influence our relationship

[choll002]

I had a horrible dream once that my SO was cheating on me. I woke up from it and was confused but extremely happy that it wasn't real. It was weird the way he acted in the dream too, like it was no big deal and that he was going to continue to cheat on me, but wanted to stay with me? Thank goodness he isn't like that in reality!