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NEED A LITTLE ADVICE ON HOW TO TRUST AGAIN

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    NEED A LITTLE ADVICE ON HOW TO TRUST AGAIN

    When my bf and i started dating he kinda cheated on me and i forgave him telling myself that he deserved a second chance but i still cannot get myself to trust him fully can anyone help me out on how to trust again???

    #2
    If you're not going to trust him, it's best not to drag it out. If you're going to forgive him, then don't bring it up. If he is sincere in saying that he won't do it again, give him the chance to prove it. If you don't let him prove it, then how will he earn your trust again? People can change. My SO and I dated a couple years ago, and he cheated on me three times. I decided to trust him again, and we have the best relationship ever. He is a fantastic person, and he really has changed.

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      #3
      hey there...

      trust isn't a button you can switch on and off you know?

      the only one you can ever trust is YOU and your gut feeling.
      listen very carefully to what your gut tells you... if it keeps nagging then probably there is something in you that needs a bit attention.
      as in.... exploring where this nagging feeling comes from. cause your SO isn't responsible for your feeling of trust entirely ...

      watch his actions closely..... instead of his words alone.

      what I am trying to say here..... it takes two to build trust...
      it's a matter of give and take.

      takes a bit of patience too..... and lots of banter between the two of you... make yourself feel happy when you're around him....
      try to be 'best friends'

      easier said than done.... I know but hey..... doesn't hurt if you try.

      best of luck...
      The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.

      Carl Jung (1875 - 1961)

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        #4
        Originally posted by Carenza LaRue View Post
        hey there...

        trust isn't a button you can switch on and off you know?

        the only one you can ever trust is YOU and your gut feeling.
        listen very carefully to what your gut tells you... if it keeps nagging then probably there is something in you that needs a bit attention.
        as in.... exploring where this nagging feeling comes from. cause your SO isn't responsible for your feeling of trust entirely ...

        watch his actions closely..... instead of his words alone.

        what I am trying to say here..... it takes two to build trust...
        it's a matter of give and take.

        takes a bit of patience too..... and lots of banter between the two of you... make yourself feel happy when you're around him....
        try to be 'best friends'

        easier said than done.... I know but hey..... doesn't hurt if you try.

        best of luck...

        This!

        You need to talk with him about how youre feeling and help him to help you trust him again. What would you like him to do that would make you feel better sort of thing.
        As long as there is air in my lungs... there is a chance

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          #5
          Thanks a lot i would try my best to trust him again and look past what happened

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            #6
            Trust can only be earned back very slowly... The only other thing I'd like to add is, if you can't trust him then it's not worth it to your relationship to be with him anymore. No relationship can work long-term if you can't trust your partner.


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              #7
              If he hasn't acted on it. Try to trust his judgement. He came clean to you because he wants no secrets between the two of you. Support him through it and let him know that you trust him.
              That will make him more aware of the fact that he DOES have your trust and he doesn't want to break it.
              Life say's we won't make it.
              Love says we will.

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                #8
                Here it's something you both have to work for. If you let him know just the feelings you're going through, his reaction might be able to help you. If he's willing to work and gain your trust back then you guys are good to go. But if he gets irritated and gets mad at you for not trusting him then it's not your fault anymore. It's his.

                He needs to fix this string that he broke and tie a very strong knot in it. And you need to be very patient and accepting of his efforts. He needs to work for you and you need to work for you as well.. And you need to tell him this, your feelings. If you won't tell him, the distance is only going to increase. So it's better not to drag it on, talk your heart out.
                Last edited by HisRaven; April 2, 2013, 11:14 AM.
                All relationships go through shit.
                Real relationships get through shit.

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