It's been a while since I've posted on the forum. This post is just to vent and also if anyone wants to post any insight and encouragement, that is also nice.
As you can see in any of my previous posts, I'm currently interested in a woman who lives in another state. Right now we are just friends. She is in the process of getting a divorce and we are both taking things slow. Sometimes really slow.
Recently, I have been trying to to do a phone call once per week type of thing where we can catch up and talk. But the last 3 or 4 weeks something seems to come up. She doesn't catch my call (but texts me later). Or I have something come up unexpectantly. Or she catches a cold/flu. On top of that she has a new job that is really stressful, she is a bit depressed I think by her current situation in life, and I've been stressed about work/life as well. So we have been keeping in contact through texting each other almost everyday.
I'm really trying to walk a fine line here where I give her space and time to heal and deal with some major continuing changes in her life. However, I'm also trying to foster our friendship. She is doing the same, but she seems very distracted by her current situation. Which is understandable. She even acknowledges that she needs to call me more, but she is very shy and not aggressive in general. So while we are both on the introvert/passive side, I'm trying to be more the aggressor in the relationship without being overbearing or aggressive.
I also want to keep our conversation and communication fresh, dynamic, and progressing toward something more. I know time will help in making her feel more comfortable with things like maybe skype, or instant messaging, or maybe even meeting up for coffee.
One last thought, her final hearing is coming up in August. So she will be divorced one way or the other in August. Things may settle before that of course. This is a huge event to the next phase of her life. I want to be in that next phase. That's another 5 months away. She wants it just over with and so do I. It's just knowing how to keep our friendship strong at a distance from now until then and even thereafter.
Thanks for letting me vent. I hope to continue to contribute on this board and give back as much as I get in feedback, encouragement, advice, and engagement. Take care everyone.
-Monk
As you can see in any of my previous posts, I'm currently interested in a woman who lives in another state. Right now we are just friends. She is in the process of getting a divorce and we are both taking things slow. Sometimes really slow.
Recently, I have been trying to to do a phone call once per week type of thing where we can catch up and talk. But the last 3 or 4 weeks something seems to come up. She doesn't catch my call (but texts me later). Or I have something come up unexpectantly. Or she catches a cold/flu. On top of that she has a new job that is really stressful, she is a bit depressed I think by her current situation in life, and I've been stressed about work/life as well. So we have been keeping in contact through texting each other almost everyday.
I'm really trying to walk a fine line here where I give her space and time to heal and deal with some major continuing changes in her life. However, I'm also trying to foster our friendship. She is doing the same, but she seems very distracted by her current situation. Which is understandable. She even acknowledges that she needs to call me more, but she is very shy and not aggressive in general. So while we are both on the introvert/passive side, I'm trying to be more the aggressor in the relationship without being overbearing or aggressive.
I also want to keep our conversation and communication fresh, dynamic, and progressing toward something more. I know time will help in making her feel more comfortable with things like maybe skype, or instant messaging, or maybe even meeting up for coffee.
One last thought, her final hearing is coming up in August. So she will be divorced one way or the other in August. Things may settle before that of course. This is a huge event to the next phase of her life. I want to be in that next phase. That's another 5 months away. She wants it just over with and so do I. It's just knowing how to keep our friendship strong at a distance from now until then and even thereafter.
Thanks for letting me vent. I hope to continue to contribute on this board and give back as much as I get in feedback, encouragement, advice, and engagement. Take care everyone.
-Monk
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