Bickering before a visit

[Black_Halloween]

In about 9 days Danny will be here and it seems as though we're starting to bicker about everything! The last 4 days have been up and down with it and its driving me insane. Of course I think "Okay I'm not fighting anymore, its getting too much" then you know..it happens again

What bothers me the most is his attitude recently. He started schooling and he's actually doing really well. He's getting all As, which I am very proud of him for but he's letting it go to his head. All of a sudden he's right about everything and he's acting like some sort of Mr. Know it all. Its so strange because its not him at all.

I've also been having nightmares recently, which is probably because of all of the worries going through my mind. His grandmother did -not- help by saying "well what if you end up not liking each other!". This was a couple weeks ago and it seems that my anxiety keeps rising. This is our first visit, ever.

Just,blah. Is this normal?

[Alsfia]

Sounds like pre-visit crazies, and there is obviously a lot of stress with meeting for the first time, especially since you two has waited for so long

[sewbama]

It's absolutely normal, and actually a trend I've been seeing in the new posts for the past couple weeks. My SO and I actually did a little of this, but it was pre-CD fighting. There's just stress, anticipation, fear, etc. Tons of emotions. Too much to contain, so you can't contain the little retorts and things that you'd normally just hold in. So you fight more. Just try to keep them small and not do anything overly mean. You guys will be alright.

[loveknowsnodistance27]

Definitely normal. I tend to pick fights with Anthony before visits. It's just a combination of nerves and stress and time not moving fast enough. But, once you are finally together, it is worth it. =]

[Sailormars]

Aww, totally normal. We argue a lot too, and I thought it was a bad sign. It's usually over little stuff, like choice of words, etc. I call that previsit jitters or if it's way before the visit - it's just the distance getting to u. I know it feels awful, but it will spark once u guys see each other again - soon! in 9 days! OMG!

[Black_Halloween]

Thank you to everybody who responded <3 I feel a little better knowing that its nothing too serious.

[bethyylovee]

It happens, especially sine it's your first meeting. Don't worry too much about it. Just remember that you'll be meeting soon! It's a great experience!

[jess_mp]

Pretty normal, you get nervous, stressed, happy, grumpy, all emotions at the same time.
My boyfriend was so nervous before my arrival when we first met, and I remember arguing about silly things, you just want to have everything ready and perfect, maybe that's why he acts like that. I wish you have a great time when you meet your bf, you will. Don't worry.

[summerkid]

is it your first meeting? .. because it's my first meeting and though we have a lot more than you to go..we're arguing so much more than before. I honestly hope that you'll get to a good place before you meet, and if not, that things will work out great when you see eachother like it happened for everybody else.

[Black_Halloween]

is it your first meeting? .. because it's my first meeting and though we have a lot more than you to go..we're arguing so much more than before. I honestly hope that you'll get to a good place before you meet, and if not, that things will work out great when you see eachother like it happened for everybody else.

Yep, first meeting! Thank you <3

[Zephii]

It seems to be normal, at least, with the newest wave of first-meeters on the site right now.

It never happened to us, but perhaps that's due to having waited far longer than the average couple, and because we didn't talk as much before visits. Before visits we both took extra time for our friends and families to make up for the amount we knew we'd ignore them/not be in contact because of being offshore. And because before visits I'd be in the city with my sister (because I'd need to be near the airport) and that was back in the day she didn't believe in the internet.

So the point of this ramble is: do things to reduce your stress, and talk to each other a bit less.

I don't want to add to the stress, but you do need to face the fact that you might not like each other. If that happens, it's not the end of the world... you could just be mates or write it off as experience. But whatever you chose to do, being realistic won't hurt you. Consider all angles, make back up plans and then you can relax knowing that you'll be alright no matter what happens.