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How would you feel? Honestly ..

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    How would you feel? Honestly ..

    Ok, So i know facebook and stuff are the root to all evil. BUT there is something that started bothering me yesterday and today it has bothered me slightly more. To the point i'm in a right bitchy sarcastic mood (This mood kinda makes me laugh to be fair) but anywhooo ...

    Up SO updates his profile pic to him and his military dog asleep in the sand in Afghanistan, Honestly it is a beautiful photo so at the same time and this GIRL commnets on the photo. He makes a funny remark something long the lines like ' Aww cute you both have the hots for me' me replying something like ' Well thats the genereal idea of having the hots for your own boyfriend' futher on down he said he couldnt help if he was a stud and she was commenting back like .. Maybe your girlfriend should know (the winky faces REALLY piss me off).

    I let it go over my head, He knew it kind pissed me off so he told med they were 'hanging out' a while back but then she got married! but something along the lines of they were going to try as a couple i appreciated he told me and forgot about it! then today being april fools day he taggs her in a quote photo thing and the quote said .. ' Baby i miss you .. HAHA april fools day now fuck off' it was just the face .. why even bother tagging her in a photo like that? i wouldnt even bother.

    I had a really back break up in june last year. i was with a gut for 3 years and then i found out he was sleeping with my friend who i was incredibly close with! ..

    PLEASE help me with adivce here? what would you think? am i over reacting?

    #2
    That's an incredible asshole-ish April Fool's joke, but aside from that, I think you're overreacting. I do winky faces to a lot of my friends and it means absolutely nothing. Sure, okay, they were originally planning on dating, but they didn't (unless I'm misunderstanding something). *shrug* Even if they did, I'm not seeing any lines she blatantly crossed other than maybe being a little bit obnoxious. Beyond that, though, it sounds like people being on Facebook being people on Facebook. I understand where the insecurities stem from, but you can't make your SO pay for those insecurities because some girl on his page used a winking face, yanno?

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      #3
      Originally posted by ThePiedPiper View Post
      That's an incredible asshole-ish April Fool's joke, but aside from that, I think you're overreacting. I do winky faces to a lot of my friends and it means absolutely nothing. Sure, okay, they were originally planning on dating, but they didn't (unless I'm misunderstanding something). *shrug* Even if they did, I'm not seeing any lines she blatantly crossed other than maybe being a little bit obnoxious. Beyond that, though, it sounds like people being on Facebook being people on Facebook. I understand where the insecurities stem from, but you can't make your SO pay for those insecurities because some girl on his page used a winking face, yanno?
      Yeah thats what i thought for the joke. It's just i would honestly only do a photo like that if i was envolved with someone in the past and still had feelings for them .. but thats me! i guess it works differently for everone. No your right they were planning on dating! .. I just know how girls work, even if a guy is taken they like to be a twat about things and try and get a point across! I'm not taking anything out on him. I think its more so her. :/

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        #4
        Originally posted by Louise_B View Post
        Yeah thats what i thought for the joke. It's just i would honestly only do a photo like that if i was envolved with someone in the past and still had feelings for them .. but thats me! i guess it works differently for everone. No your right they were planning on dating! .. I just know how girls work, even if a guy is taken they like to be a twat about things and try and get a point across! I'm not taking anything out on him. I think its more so her. :/
        But if you trust him to say no to her and keep his boundaries, why does she matter? Eventually you have to accept the fact that if you don't trust the other woman, you probably don't trust your SO. No one who had feelings for me while I was in a relationship ever got anywhere with me, and I put an end to their flirting as soon as they tried. It's not like your SO is helpless. If anything happens, it's his fault as much as hers, which means if you trust him not to do anything with her and to set boundaries with her, then you should trust that nothing is going to happen.

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          #5
          I think this is more than light hearted flirting and they probably have private conversations going on.

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            #6
            Originally posted by digitalfever View Post
            I think this is more than light hearted flirting and they probably have private conversations going on.
            I'm inclined to agree.



            Met online: 1/30/11
            Met in person: 5/30/12
            Second visit: 9/12/12
            Closed the distance: 1/26/13!!!

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              #7
              Yeah, I wouldn't be happy about that. It sounds like there's more (the whole "Your girlfriend should know") going on then maybe you know about but obviously, you can't say anything for sure because some girls are like you described, down right horrible. With my SO, we both cut off contact with our exes. No reason to have them still in our lives. A little harsh but it's helped a lot, maybe you should suggest something like that?

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                #8
                Originally posted by digitalfever View Post
                I think this is more than light hearted flirting and they probably have private conversations going on.
                I'm going to co-sign with this statement.
                https://wearenottrayvonmartin.tumblr.com/
                Makes my heart feel better a tiny bit.

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                  #9
                  What they said! I think that you're letting your own insecurities affect how you perceive your SO's actions.

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                    #10
                    If you're going to get mad about not being tagged or smiley faces and picture comments, I suggest you two not be friends on facebook or delete you account entirely. This will not be the only time something like this happens. It's meaningless.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Maybe the statement was more like "maybe, your gf should know ;D" and she was saying in a kinda flirty/sarcastic way that you are the one that should know if he is 'a stud' or not. People have horrible grammar all over the internet, facebook is no exception. If people make comments on fb that are something I want to dodge an actual reply to (when I've already said something to the person) I will usually make a little snarky/sarcastic comment like that with a winky face at the end. I don't think you should let it bother you so much unless something happens that is really suspicious or worth getting upset over.

                      i admit that, yes, I would be a bit jealous if someone made a comment like that to my SO but that's just because I don't like the idea of anyone actually flirting with or having an interest in him.. though I know it's completely irrational lol.
                      "Babe, I'm totally murdering everyone in this building right now! ... You would be so proud of me."
                      This. This is only one of the reasons that I love this man. XD



                      "I'll surrender up my heart and swap it for yours."
                      Por siempre, mi amor. ♥

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by Brieasaurus View Post
                        Yeah, I wouldn't be happy about that. It sounds like there's more (the whole "Your girlfriend should know") going on then maybe you know about but obviously, you can't say anything for sure because some girls are like you described, down right horrible. With my SO, we both cut off contact with our exes. No reason to have them still in our lives. A little harsh but it's helped a lot, maybe you should suggest something like that?
                        Yeah to be honest she looks like the kind of girl who would love to look like shes getting one over on you. I did speak to him about it. i told he i wasn't mad angry or upset just the simple fact it was making me feel a little uneasy. He then told me over and over again I'm the woman for him and the humor between him and this Leah is just rough.

                        The thing is a lot of people get rubbed up the wrong way with my SO because of his humor and sarcastic attitude towards life. And apparently she gets his humor. He said he would tone it down for me if it was making me feel uneasy but i told him not too just carry on what your doing. I guess i just had to get it off my chest.

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                          #13
                          I agree that they are probably talking on the side too. Where is her spouse at in all this? Can't he see her facebook posts? I think at the very least your SO is enjoying the attention from her a bit too much. I would post back on SO's photo under that comment, about "maybe your GF should know", something along the lines of ...........She does and boy is she happy to have him as her BF and cannot wait to show him how much when he is back in her loving arms again. Along with a cute little emoticon of your own. How adult said icon is..... all up to you.

                          You want to flirt with my BF you have to go through me. You can still trust him but there is nothing wrong with showing your lust for your man as well.
                          "Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. "
                          Benjamin Franklin

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                            #14
                            The whole flirting issue can be annoying sometimes. Facebook is one horrible thing! I think one should avoid being too flirty when in a relationship, all it does is to feed the ego but it can end up being confusing to one's SO or even another person who may be indeed having the hots for this flirty person. It is fun to flirt, to be honest, but sometimes it can't be good in a relationship. Specially in a long distance relationship, these things can get sort of delicate.

                            The april's fool joke WAS bad though. I've been told I'm really sarcastic, mostly in "real life", but sarcasm isn't really that good on the internet, it can be easily misunderstood. Toying with people's feelings like this is just not right.

                            I'm glad you talked to him and that he said he will tone it down. I hope he understands he can be a stud even if he's not that flirty. A man can be even more manly when he respects his woman! Good luck

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by Aurora View Post
                              The whole flirting issue can be annoying sometimes. Facebook is one horrible thing! I think one should avoid being too flirty when in a relationship, all it does is to feed the ego but it can end up being confusing to one's SO or even another person who may be indeed having the hots for this flirty person. It is fun to flirt, to be honest, but sometimes it can't be good in a relationship. Specially in a long distance relationship, these things can get sort of delicate.

                              The april's fool joke WAS bad though. I've been told I'm really sarcastic, mostly in "real life", but sarcasm isn't really that good on the internet, it can be easily misunderstood. Toying with people's feelings like this is just not right.

                              I'm glad you talked to him and that he said he will tone it down. I hope he understands he can be a stud even if he's not that flirty. A man can be even more manly when he respects his woman! Good luck
                              Ah thank you Aurora, After i started this thread, people may think he doesn't respect me BUT however, he had so much respect for me and ive never had that before. He dislikes how people talk to me and how they take me for granted. The main thing is that he took the responsibility of toning it down and im thankful for that!

                              The harmless flirting is annoying. I get his humor because i know him and how he is, but when girls play the whole humor back with him it makes me uneasy because i dont know them ya'know?

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