Time-Zone advice?

[Babylonia]

This August, when my SO starts college on the West Coast, we will officially be in different time-zones for a very long time. Since our relationship so far has at least been in the same state, I was wondering if anyone had any tips on how to keep communication open between different time-zones, or how to adjust to the decrease in texting and skyping that is bound to happen.

[.:*Shaunna*:.]

My bf and I are on opposite time zones but we found it isn't too bad because one is 'waking up' while the other is 'going to bed' so it's a 13 hour time difference which isn't so bad as opposed to being in the middle of the night. What I might suggest though (it might sound corny lol) is organise 'skype date nights' and try and stick to the same time so that you have something to look forward too Also helps when you miss them because you have something to look forward too

[Hollandia]

Me and my SO live together half the time, about 3 months together and then 3 months apart. When we are CD we are fairly in snyc and spent most time together when he is not at work or school. I do my work when he is away usually and it works out great. We have to adjust back to the time difference by making a point to make time for the other and sacrificing a bit. He sacrifices sleep sometimes to stay up a bit later and I sacrifice my early parts of the day and push my chores and work till after he sleeps sometimes. The weekends are great because we both have more time to spend together but sometimes it stinks being tethered to the internet on a bright sunny day. When we are LD, he gets at 600am his time for work each day and usually comes on Skype sometime after his dinner around 7:00pm-8:00pm his time. This is the middle of the work day for me so If I can't push work we don't talk till closer to 11:00pm his time. He tries to stay up till at least midnight each night so that we can talk. It is not fun but we love each other so we make it work. When we both are off we spend the entire day online together.

[Moon]

We have a 7 hour difference. My best advice to you is to get on a schedule and stick to it as much as possible. It might take a few months and a lot of patience and understanding, but once you get into the groove of it, it's not so bad For us, we even mostly stick to it on weekends, it's just easier and there's much less confusion, and of course, sometimes it varies when one of us has stuff to do or whatever, but we've been doing it for 4 years and are pretty used to everything. You can do this, good luck!

[Catface]

My SO and I have a five hour time difference. It's not too bad sometimes but tonight we stayed up playing video games together and now he's going to bed. AT SIX A.M. So it can be hard to resist making bad choices to spend time with each other.

For my SO and I, we don't do well with set dates. When I say this I mean for example, meeting every Monday at 2 pm on Skype. What works for us is saying, Game of Thrones comes on Sunday nights. We'll grab the episode Monday and watch it when we're both not working on Monday. When we have certain shows we watch together, we KNOW that the day after is when we watch them. We will also say things like, I would like to see you on this day, lets set a time.

That sounds confusing to me reading it back, but I don't know how else to explain. We set times and days, but not on the same time/day every week. We communicate about what we'd like, but are flexible as well. Setting a schedule just doesn't work for us, so it might not for you either, but do what's best for you!

The biggest other thing here to mention is about respecting the time difference. If you text your SO and it's 3 am there, they may not appreciate being woken up. Have a conversation about that so they can either be okay with it, you can avoid it, or you can both set your phones to silent at night. This was a big thing for me when my SO was getting up at 4 am my time and saying GOOD MORNING LIEFDE!!! Not as lovely at 4 am

[chizatlauren]

15 hours is hell for me and my SO, but we schedule the times we go on Skype on weekdays so we won't have problems about it. It's just funny cause it's always dark in his area when it's too bright in mine. We're on the exact opposite sides of the world.

[13000km]

We had 15/16 hours time difference too, while we were LD. Setting a fixed general area of time to talk worked wonderfully for us. But I still had the flexibility to say "hey, go to sleep, I'm going out with my friends tonight." We quickly fell into a routine, and it made things simpler.

[snow]

6 hours here and I am ahead.
We usually try to spend lots of time together which means I have to stay up pretty late (3 or 4 am) and we agreed that when I have to get up early I tell him in advance (as much as possible, so far it's been a day or 2) so he can seek something to do from 6pm to 10pm which he would normally spend with me.

I agree with moon - schedules are important! Stick to them!

[MattDavies86]

Defo a pain in the ass, best to figure out a schedule you can contact each other, or weekends etc! or leave messages for each other to reply when the other is awake

I'm a bit lucky, my teirak and I are only 6 hours (at the moment) but it fluctuates between 6-7 with BST

[80anthea]

It's 5 hours between us (except for a period of about 2 weeks where it drops to 4 due to clock changes). It can be a pain but we tend to just message each other through the day, my SO knows I sleep with my phone on silent (as does he) so he knows messaging me through my night doesn't wake me. Then we have a window of between 7pm -midnight (my time) that is after he has finished work. Sometimes when I wake up in the morning around 6am he's still awake his end so we have a little catch up then which is nice to wake up to. There's always a way round these things, we're both quite laid back though and don't necessarily plan strictly when we'll chat as we always know we will. My SO also gets the ferry to work which is around 3pm my time so if either of us are having a really bad day or just have the urge to talk we can catch each other then.

[JoeyBug]

We have a five hour difference (sometimes 4 with the time changes) and we manage by setting up certain days to talk on the phone, and text in between, as well as email. We make sure that we're not expecting a reply right then, and if we are we mention that it's important otherwise he picks up his messages when he's awake and around and so do I...Good Luck

[ZenZeta]

My SO and I have a 6 hour time difference, and we try to schedule communication time. Lately, we have found that it works easier if he calls me during my morning which is his lunchbreak. This usually means that I am either preparing for work or en route. It's always funny to greet each other (I say Good Morning and he says Good Afternoon).

Sometimes developing a "window" of communication time helps if the time difference isn't too vast. I always wonder how folks do it when it is literally a half day between the two. That's worked for us.

I've found that it also helps if you split the sacrifice. I will get up early a couple of days to talk to him and he will stay up late a couple of days to do the same.

It's a lot of trial and error, but you will develop a rhythm.