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    Love after death?

    Today tragedy happened to a friend of mine, her boyfriend of two years died after a long and terrible disease .. They were really in love and one who saw them would say that they were meant to be for life. But there it happened - he died, "passed away" and she is still here, without him. What happened really upset me, and it lead me to thinking all day about things like, what happens when your loved one dies? Does love vanish with death? Eventually, one will have to go, right? What then??

    I believe that our souls, as something non-material, don't get created with birth, but are something that is constant, in means that they never stops existing. My SO and I just refuse to believe that a love like ours (and a lot of other people's) is just bound to stop existing after death.. Also, that a person is capable on loving multiple times in the same way, and that the connection created between two souls/hearts is something temporary and breaks once death occurs.. We came up with the theory (not claiming we are the first ones ) that human beings, as souls in containers, are undergoing a constant rebirth, either in a repeating cycle on Earth, or entering new levels and spaces each time (what I would like to believe), and at that they stay connected with the One that is their other half - meaning you aren't quite meeting your SO for the first time, and that you have known them for many many lives before, just don't remember that And ultimately, the goal in the existance of the soul is to proceed and learn and evolve through the different spectrums and levels of existance, with a specific goal for each life - to find the one that completes you, your other half, once again, until eventually becoming one maybe ^^ And about the couples where one departs before the other one, like my friend, we guess the sooner departed one would have to wait for the other one

    After what happened with my friend and being choked by the fears of discontinuance of love, and not meeting your loved one ever again after death, it really helped me to create an image of an existance in which, even if separated, in another life SO and I would still be together ^^ I would love to hear other people's thoughts and ideas on this subject, if you find it interesting
    Last edited by libelle; May 8, 2013, 03:13 PM.

    #2
    Sorry to hear about your friend.

    I believe in something similar - I guess what you're describing is reincarnation? Not necessarily that you'll come back as a beetle if you messed up in your last life, but that you will need to relearn what you needed to in order to accomplish your goal in the next life.

    In regards to my love passing away - I think about it all the time. Irrationally so, I believe. Because we're not guaranteed each day - he or I may be in an accident and that's, well that. It's scary to think about. I don't think I'm strong enough to have something like that happen to me. I firmly believe that I will never love anyone else like I love my husband. I honestly don't know what I'd do if I lost him.

    Met: November 19, 2010
    Tim came to Texas: April 27, 2011
    Made it official: April 29, 2011
    Lori went to England: September 21, 2011
    Mini trip to Paris: September 22, 2011
    Tim popped the question: September 22, 2011
    K-1 Visa approved!: May 21, 2012
    Closed the distance!: July 26, 2012
    Got married: September 22, 2012

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      #3
      I'm so sorry for your friend. That would be a soul crushing blow.

      I'm not sure what I believe anymore. I used to identify as a Christian, but after a lot of thought, I've moved away from that belief and am now not really sure what happens after death or love after death, to stay on topic. I like to think that Scott and I would be able to meet again in a new life, but I'm not really sure. Definitely food for thought though.

      Apologises for any mistakes, my brain issue is causing problems with my eyes
      Joey & Scott
      Met: April 2002
      Lost Contact: August 2002
      Reconnected: April 2010
      Together: May 20th 2010






      [COLOR="#800080"]"Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight." Benjamin Franklin

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        #4
        Hmmmm...., I don’t know what I believe.

        I’m usually at battle with myself when it comes to spiritual things because the academic in me is saying “you fool!” and the hopeful side in me is saying “you never know!” but to be honest..., I really don’t?

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          #5
          Originally posted by digitalfever View Post
          Hmmmm...., I don’t know what I believe.

          I’m usually at battle with myself when it comes to spiritual things because the academic in me is saying “you fool!” and the hopeful side in me is saying “you never know!” but to be honest..., I really don’t?
          That's the battle I have. I'm intelligent, I'm an academic in some ways and I want to say "impossible, no way, no how", but I also want to hope and say "maybe, possible, hopefully?" I don't seem to know which right now.

          Apologises for any mistakes, my brain issue is causing problems with my eyes
          Joey & Scott
          Met: April 2002
          Lost Contact: August 2002
          Reconnected: April 2010
          Together: May 20th 2010






          [COLOR="#800080"]"Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight." Benjamin Franklin

          Comment


            #6
            Not purposely trying to play devil's advocate here, but...

            I'm a little curious who you think will be "waiting" for you in the case of remarriage, or whatever. You can most definitely have more than one great love in your life, in which case, I think your scenario of afterwards might be a bit awkward I know you probably think you can only have real love once, but it happens multiple times for many people. Just sayin'!

            I don't believe in an afterlife, reincarnation, or anything like that, but your idea seems like it would be very comforting for those who do believe.
            Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein

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              #7
              I believe that love itself is immortal. Even if a person's soul leaves their physical body, the love which they held in their heart for others and the love which others had for them continues to exist. I can't say what's beyond this life - who can? - but I do believe we meet our loved ones again. That thought brings me comfort, if nothing else.

              Prayers for your friend and her SO.

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                #8
                I am very sorry to hear your friend's news that is terribly sad


                Personally I'm an atheist (as is so) so neither of us believe in any form of afterlife or soul. I think the only chance you get is the one here and now, obviously I hope we are together until we die but when one of us dies my hope is that the other one carries on living life to the full. If I die first, I hate the thought of my so sitting around grieving for the the rest of his life, I would hope he would go out and live, if he found someone else to love that would be fine, it wouldn't mean he loves me any less now.

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                  #9
                  Interesting thread
                  I'm a christian (but not a very active one, I'm going through something at the moment).
                  So I believe in life after death or (hopefully) going to heaven
                  I've become quite cynical though these past years when it comes to love etc.
                  I mean when you look around you and see what people are doing.
                  Divorces, broken families.
                  My best friend has in a very short time period fallen in love with another guy, cheated on her husband, separated, together with the new guy,
                  baby on the way, gotten engaged, three kids with the ex. And she is a christian too.
                  So I feel....rather lost at the moment.

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                    #10
                    I also meant to write that I am really sorry to hear what happened to your friend. It sounds really terrible

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                      #11
                      So sorry for your friend.

                      My SO and I talked about this once when we first started dating. He was very actively raised Catholic and still believes that there's a heaven that you'll go to and get to see everyone you loved. I'm more or less an Atheist and just think that you just stop existing when you die. It is a comforting thought that you believe in, guess we'll never know though eh?

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                        #12
                        I was engaged 15 years ago. we were soulmates. he died of a heart attack while we were out to dinner. he went out to the car to get some air, i went to chck on him and he died in my arms. I will never forget about him. i still have the same feelings for him to this day.
                        i am deeply in love with my SO now tho.
                        everything happens for a reason. We may never find out what that reason is/was, but there is a reason.

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                          #13
                          Yeah, I guess I found this explanation around things for comfort and reassurance, I really can't imagine ever being separated from him, and what happened to my friend triggered those feelings a lot.. Sorry if my thoughts offended someone

                          subeasley, I am sorry for your loss And Moon, I don't know, I am torn in my thoughts.. I guess because my SO has been the only person outside my family I have such feelings for, and I never had to go through losing him, or falling in love a second time in a different person, I would like to think that this thing is unique and can't be repeated over and over, otherwise it kind of loses its.. charm? purpose? After all, why do we fall inlove if it will naturally just come to an end, no matter what we do in life? :/

                          I am not religous, so I am not very familiar with the interpretations of heaven, but isn't that the same like what I described, the passing of the soul in another dimention, where it continues its life? except for in heaven the reconnection with the deceased loved ones is presented like a actual meeting, whereas in my thoughts its not something you realise until later ^^

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                            #14
                            I do not believe in an afterlife, so once one of us is gone, they're gone. We will not see each other again. I would not want my SO to spend the rest of his life mourning me and pining after the love we had. I want him to go out there and find someone who can make him happy. If he realizes that someone makes him happier than I ever did and that he loves them more than he ever loved me, so be it. I'll be dead and buried and it won't affect me, but the thought of him being happy after me, makes me happy.

                            Works the other way too. I will be crushed if my SO were to die, but I don't think my life will be over. I'll always love him, he will always have his place in my heart and I will cherish his memory. So I guess love does continue after death, in a way. And if we have children they will pass on the memory of our love.

                            But that's about it.
                            I thought of you and the years and all the sadness fell away from me - Pink Floyd

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                              #15
                              Firstly I'm so sorry for your friend, and Subeasley, I'm glad you've found love again, I can't imagine how difficult it is to lose a partner.

                              I don't think I believe in any form of life after death.

                              My question would be, why only your SO? There are many forms of deep love and attachment, parents, some friends, people who really (and equally) enrich your being. Your SO is one part of that whole, and I find it difficult to believe that in any afterlife we may or may not have, his 'soul' would be the only 'soul' mine recognised.

                              And even if your 'souls' are irrevocably entwined, that doesn't necessarily mean that (if you believe in reincarnation/a next life) your innate connection would manifest itself as romantic love. Yes, it might be comforting, but if your 'souls' can connect in the afterlife, I don't see why other 'souls' can't be connected with in the afterlife - which brings a problem for those we've connected with romantically, because which 'soul' would be your romantic partner? That means that either a.) You can connect with each other, but it doesn't always manifest itself as romantic love, or b.) You only have ONE true romantic-love partner - which I just don't think is true... most of us have loved more than one person in our lifetime, and of course you'll assign the 'one and only' to the partner you're with now... =/

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