Need a hug, missing him

[JoeyBug]

Hi Everyone...

I didn't know where else to turn, so I came here and hoped that people would be able to offer a perspective because you've all been there and know how it feels.

I am disabled, as some of you are aware, I have several conditions, but two of those cause me to be in a great deal of pain 90% of the time. I also have some problems with my brain that is a recent diagnosis. I had an awesome day on Monday, but on Tuesday I was back stuck in this flare I've been in since Jan/Feb time. I spent most of yesterday sleeping and resting and was hoping to feel better today. I did for a little this morning when I managed to get my uni work all done and caught up with. I still have some to do tomorrow, but I think I'll manage it.

Anyway, after I'd done that my day went downhill and I've had to take a few more pain killers than I usually would and I'm still in pain and my brain is playing up (I have some brain damage) and my vision is off, but nothing will help that so I just need to work through it.

I miss Scott, he'd normally hug me and let me cry and then he'd tuck me up in bed and lay with me talking about nothing in particular. If he couldn't do that, he'd text me and try to make me laugh, or he'd phone and we'd talk until I fell asleep or something. Except we've text today but he's watching his niece and nephews as his brother got a new job and moved about 90 minutes away and so they're staying with Scott (and his parents) to finish out the school year. His niece had her field day today (like sports day for those like me who had never heard of it before!) and was feeling down because she wanted her dad there and he couldn't be so she asked Scott to take her and so he's busy with her and although he can text, he's got three kids that need his attention, so I'm left to just miss him and hurt.

I know we're moving in the right direction. I know we're starting the visa process, but it just feels like this is going on forever. I last saw him in April 2012. (Bar the occasional video message on Viber/text) I just want him to be here and I know that you'll all know how that feels. I just feel like I'm on my own and I know I'm not, but pain and missing him are not a good mix, pain alters how your emotions react and I feel like I'm gonna be sat here crying like a loon.

If nothing else, thanks for reading...it helped to get it all out.

[kattermole]

Oh sweetie, I'm not surprised you feel so down. It's bad enough missing your SO when you're feeling well but it must be horrible when you're having such health problems. I think sometimes you just need to have a good cry, thre's only so much looking on the bright side you can do, sometimes you do have to wallow for a bit. Let yourself have a weep and try and do something nice for yourself, whether it be a nice bath or having a whole tub of ice cream, or anything that might be a little ray of light. You just have to remember the reasons you're in this, and however crap you feel now, you are loved by someone and love someone and so many people don't have that. I know that's little comfort when you just want to be held. I can give you a cyber hug and hope it makes you smile a little bit Feel free to PM me if you need to chat xxx

Oh and just to make you smile a bit more, here is a bunny with a pancake on its head.

[JoeyBug]

Oh sweetie, I'm not surprised you feel so down. It's bad enough missing your SO when you're feeling well but it must be horrible when you're having such health problems. I think sometimes you just need to have a good cry, thre's only so much looking on the bright side you can do, sometimes you do have to wallow for a bit. Let yourself have a weep and try and do something nice for yourself, whether it be a nice bath or having a whole tub of ice cream, or anything that might be a little ray of light. You just have to remember the reasons you're in this, and however crap you feel now, you are loved by someone and love someone and so many people don't have that. I know that's little comfort when you just want to be held. I can give you a cyber hug and hope it makes you smile a little bit Feel free to PM me if you need to chat xxx

Oh and just to make you smile a bit more, here is a bunny with a pancake on its head.

Thanks for this, I think I will have a little cry and just wallow for a little in my misery! Then I can get up tomorrow and start afresh. As I tell myself daily, "Why worry? Life is full of sunrises"

Thanks for the hug and the picture, it did make me smile and feel a little better.

Apologises for any mistakes, my brain issue is causing problems with my eyes

[Ahava]

Hugs!
I hope you are feeling better soon x
Do you have a set date of when he is coming to see you next time?

[lademoiselle]

Tomorrow is indeed another day I hope you feel better very soon <3

[Captivated]

I can't imagine being in constant pain. And missing your SO never goes away - at least for me...even though we're CD now. Sending you lots of cyber hugs (though I know real ones from the SO would be more ideal!)

Kattermole - lmao at the photo!

[JoeyBug]

Hugs!
I hope you are feeling better soon x
Do you have a set date of when he is coming to see you next time?

Thanks for the hugs. No set date, we're hoping to submit the visa August 2013, and he should hopefully be here by the end of the year, which is something, but nothing in stone.

Tomorrow is indeed another day I hope you feel better very soon <3

It is indeed, thanks for the video, it's really cute!

I can't imagine being in constant pain. And missing your SO never goes away - at least for me...even though we're CD now. Sending you lots of cyber hugs (though I know real ones from the SO would be more ideal!)

Kattermole - lmao at the photo!

Thanks for the cyber hugs, they may not be ideal but I'll take what I can get right now!

Apologises for any mistakes, my brain issue is causing problems with my eyes

[Kristin91]

Oh Joey! I'm sorry you're going through this alone right now but we're here for you! Try doing what kattermole suggested and doing something for yourself to make yourself feel better.

[dragonlady]

i dont know how to insert pic's but this site always puts a smile on my face when i am down
https://icanhas.cheezburger.com/

[loveknowsnodistance27]

Awww I'm sorry you're missing him so badly today. I know how hard it is when you feel like you need them there and nothing makes it better. But, I promise you it will get better. Even though it hurts, you will be together someday! Hopefully you guys can visit soon. *hugs*

[Benni]

Ohhh! I hope this is just temporary and you will have a better day tomorrow/soon. ((HUGS))

[Hollandia]

Sometime when I miss my SO badly I play our song and listen to it while I over and over again. After I get done that I put on a funny movie to push forward. I totally understand how you feel. Hugz to you.

[Jazi]

Oh sweetie, I'm not surprised you feel so down. It's bad enough missing your SO when you're feeling well but it must be horrible when you're having such health problems. I think sometimes you just need to have a good cry, thre's only so much looking on the bright side you can do, sometimes you do have to wallow for a bit. Let yourself have a weep and try and do something nice for yourself, whether it be a nice bath or having a whole tub of ice cream, or anything that might be a little ray of light. You just have to remember the reasons you're in this, and however crap you feel now, you are loved by someone and love someone and so many people don't have that. I know that's little comfort when you just want to be held. I can give you a cyber hug and hope it makes you smile a little bit Feel free to PM me if you need to chat xxx

Oh and just to make you smile a bit more, here is a bunny with a pancake on its head.

Kat had some lovely words there - remember why you're in this with him and how much he adores and loves you. He wishes he could be there, i have no doubt. I agree that you should treat yourself!

AND here is the twitter account of that bunny.. "Stuff on my rabbit" there is a ton of pictures and it gets more funny the more you look

https://twitter.com/SOMRofficial