I apologize in advance, this will be very long!
So, my boyfriend and I met online about a year ago. We started chatting and soon became best friends. Then we found ourselves talking for hours and hours. After 5 months of talking (In May) we both confessed that we were attracted to each other but the distance will be hard. We didn't care, we thought that it was 100% worth it to try. He lives in FL and I live in New York. We agreed on September for us to meet and from there make plans to stay with each other.
The first few months were amazing. We'd call and text each other whenever we had downtime (which was very, very often). At times spending 8-10 hours skyping each other. September rolls around and our plans of meeting get put off for a little while. He tells me he's having trouble saving up money, he owes a lot and is playing catch up.
During the first few months we'd always talk about how great it'll be when we get together and how we can't wait. By December all talk of meeting is not brought up unless it comes from me. Whenever I bring it up, he sometimes gets annoyed. Even when I suggest me coming to visit him so that he won't have to pay. He doesn't like where he lives, and I can tell he doesn't want me there. But all other behavior is normal. When we talk he's completely normal.
Fast forward to now: Since December he and I would fight over very small things and would blow up over it. Not frequently but it happened around 3-4 times. Also, he's starting to hang out with his friends more often and talking and spending less time with me. I know it's stupid, but I get upset and I know it's so clingy because I want him to spend all his free time with me! It also makes me feel insecure because I think something's wrong with me because he doesn't want to spend as much time with me anymore.
I made plans to move 2 states away from him so that it would possibly make it easier for us to see each other. A week before I move, he starts working over time and not returning my texts until 10pm or even later. (He gets off of work around 6pm at the latest) Then after he returns my texts so late, he'll tell me his friends are over then he'll eventually call me at like 1am for our usual goodnight call. I confessed to him one night that I feel us getting distant and it's bumming me out. He doesn't return my text when I know he read it. I texted him again and said that I guess I was annoying him and that I would stop. He then responds and says he's working a lot and the whole year we've been together he's been neglecting responsibilities and now he has to play catch up. He's getting tired of the online thing and that he finds himself having less time for an long distance relationship. He also fears us meeting because we have different circumstances. (My family is very well off where as his isn't and he's been living on his own since 17ish) I ask him to call me so that we could talk instead of texting. Finally he calls me and I tell him that I'm sorry and I didn't realize how much work he has and that I'm not the only thing he has in his life. He says I shouldn't be sorry because it's not my fault that he's got all this stuff to do. I then say that it sounds like he wants to end it but I don't agree because we haven't even seen eachother yet and we've been building our relationship for that moment and if we don't meet we will never know if it would have worked. He agrees and it was hard to tell if he was sincere.
The next morning I text him with our usual good morning text. We then chat very briefly and then we stop talking. He then doesn't text me again for the rest of the day (not normal for him at all) but I don't text him because I'm trying my hardest to not be clingy. He texts me early the next morning and says he had a bad day yesterday and was wrapped up in it. I was a little upset because before if he was having a bad day, he would have confided in me - but I didn't say anything. We talk about what happened and everything seems fine. He even calls me for a quick chat during his break. (Been a really long time since he's done that) After that we stop talking. I send him a text around 7ish because I know he's home and I thought it would be okay. He gets my text and doesn't respond (I know he's read it) until 10. We talk and it's all so normal. He calls me for our goodnight call and he says he loves me for the first time since that big discussion. We talk again the next morning about the issue he was having and in the middle of our conversation he stops responding. I don't text him again for another 3 hours and tell him about me feeling sick. He responds with, "aww damn." I'm feeling a little miffed since I spent so much time talking about his problems but now when it's about me, that's all he says. I text right back and ask how everything is. He still hasn't responded and it's been 3 hours.
HELP! Am I doing something wrong? Should I give him space? Does it sound like he has someone else?
So, my boyfriend and I met online about a year ago. We started chatting and soon became best friends. Then we found ourselves talking for hours and hours. After 5 months of talking (In May) we both confessed that we were attracted to each other but the distance will be hard. We didn't care, we thought that it was 100% worth it to try. He lives in FL and I live in New York. We agreed on September for us to meet and from there make plans to stay with each other.
The first few months were amazing. We'd call and text each other whenever we had downtime (which was very, very often). At times spending 8-10 hours skyping each other. September rolls around and our plans of meeting get put off for a little while. He tells me he's having trouble saving up money, he owes a lot and is playing catch up.
During the first few months we'd always talk about how great it'll be when we get together and how we can't wait. By December all talk of meeting is not brought up unless it comes from me. Whenever I bring it up, he sometimes gets annoyed. Even when I suggest me coming to visit him so that he won't have to pay. He doesn't like where he lives, and I can tell he doesn't want me there. But all other behavior is normal. When we talk he's completely normal.
Fast forward to now: Since December he and I would fight over very small things and would blow up over it. Not frequently but it happened around 3-4 times. Also, he's starting to hang out with his friends more often and talking and spending less time with me. I know it's stupid, but I get upset and I know it's so clingy because I want him to spend all his free time with me! It also makes me feel insecure because I think something's wrong with me because he doesn't want to spend as much time with me anymore.
I made plans to move 2 states away from him so that it would possibly make it easier for us to see each other. A week before I move, he starts working over time and not returning my texts until 10pm or even later. (He gets off of work around 6pm at the latest) Then after he returns my texts so late, he'll tell me his friends are over then he'll eventually call me at like 1am for our usual goodnight call. I confessed to him one night that I feel us getting distant and it's bumming me out. He doesn't return my text when I know he read it. I texted him again and said that I guess I was annoying him and that I would stop. He then responds and says he's working a lot and the whole year we've been together he's been neglecting responsibilities and now he has to play catch up. He's getting tired of the online thing and that he finds himself having less time for an long distance relationship. He also fears us meeting because we have different circumstances. (My family is very well off where as his isn't and he's been living on his own since 17ish) I ask him to call me so that we could talk instead of texting. Finally he calls me and I tell him that I'm sorry and I didn't realize how much work he has and that I'm not the only thing he has in his life. He says I shouldn't be sorry because it's not my fault that he's got all this stuff to do. I then say that it sounds like he wants to end it but I don't agree because we haven't even seen eachother yet and we've been building our relationship for that moment and if we don't meet we will never know if it would have worked. He agrees and it was hard to tell if he was sincere.
The next morning I text him with our usual good morning text. We then chat very briefly and then we stop talking. He then doesn't text me again for the rest of the day (not normal for him at all) but I don't text him because I'm trying my hardest to not be clingy. He texts me early the next morning and says he had a bad day yesterday and was wrapped up in it. I was a little upset because before if he was having a bad day, he would have confided in me - but I didn't say anything. We talk about what happened and everything seems fine. He even calls me for a quick chat during his break. (Been a really long time since he's done that) After that we stop talking. I send him a text around 7ish because I know he's home and I thought it would be okay. He gets my text and doesn't respond (I know he's read it) until 10. We talk and it's all so normal. He calls me for our goodnight call and he says he loves me for the first time since that big discussion. We talk again the next morning about the issue he was having and in the middle of our conversation he stops responding. I don't text him again for another 3 hours and tell him about me feeling sick. He responds with, "aww damn." I'm feeling a little miffed since I spent so much time talking about his problems but now when it's about me, that's all he says. I text right back and ask how everything is. He still hasn't responded and it's been 3 hours.
HELP! Am I doing something wrong? Should I give him space? Does it sound like he has someone else?
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