Feeling guilty :/

[PrincessJOE]

This morning we had a little argument. it wasnt even an argument in fact, but i feel kinda guilty now.

Just to give you an idea of the situation, I'm going through a pretty difficult moment in my life (not in our relationship, its just with my family) and he really means the world to me, he is like... the only peaceful 'corner' in such a messy moment.
So, we are on a LDR of course, and in these days he is away with some friends: i could trust him with my life, so that's not the problem, i just miss him more than i 'should' cos i get to miss that 'lil piece of heaven'.

yesterday, as i said, he was away with some friends and as i was about to go to sleep and i didnt hear from him in a while, i texted him. he didn't write back until this morning when he woke up, and i was kinda worried (not cos of the text itself, just cos he was away, and my 'weakness' in this period plays a big role in it too i think).
to keep it short, he got drunk and spent time with his friends, nothing special really, ive known him for years and i know he s not the kind of person who gets in troubles, but for some reason this morning it kinda made me feel bad. As i said, we didnt really have an argument at all (i love each of us has his/her own spaces and friends, so its not about it really!), but i told him i got worried and then i was a bit 'cold' towards him.
Now i feel kinda guilty about it, cos i know he didn't do anything bad, it was just a mix of other things in my life pulling the trigger.

does it ever happen to you?
a part of me would like to explain him it wasnt really anything against him, that i was just stressed by other stuff, but at the same time i dont want to give too much importance to it, as it was something really stupid.

[loneliestgirl]

Next time you talk to him, just say Hey about this morning, I may have been a little cold or snappy. I've a lot of stuff going on and I didn't mean to take my stress out on you and overreact. It wasn't fair to you cuz you didn't do anything wrong. And i just wanted to apologize and let you know I appreciate you.

Hopefully, he will be understanding and not hold onto it. Afterwards, just let it go. The rest of the apology is you just being mindful of not taking things out on him in the future or removing yourself from the situation when you start to feel that coming on.

[Verojoon]

I had the almost exact same thing happen a couple weeks ago. I was going through some really difficult times and he is exactly like you described my little corner of calm! And I really needed him but suddenly he had this social life and he wasn't there for me... and part of me didn't want him to be there... I much preferred him being out enjoying himself than being stuck in the toxic situation he's in at home just so I could talk to him about my problems! But another part of me really, really needed him and I was really hurt...

I tried to communicate it with him... and he took it all the wrong way, saying I was just like his mom telling him he should go out more and then giving him hell when he does... (I really didn't give him hell! I re-read my email several times after the fight and I still can't see how he took it so bad!!) It turned into a big fight... and we kinda sorted it out, but for the next couple weeks it seemed we were fighting about everything...

In the end we did work it all out and we are now doing really good (things in my life are still bad, but he's realized that me needing him doesn't have to take his whole night!) Anyways, you probably should explain to him why you reacted that way and apologize and hopefully your SO won't continue to take everything the wrong way... if he does, well, you guys will sort it out, I'm sure!

[PrincessJOE]

thanks to both of you

Verojoon: i really 'felt' your words cos its exactly what i feel: im really happy of the time he spends with his friends and they are really nice people too. but at the same time i wish he could be by my side when i need to talk to someone who has a good influence on me.
Luckily we didnt get further on the 'argument' (im happy to read you sorted it out anyway ), i mean... i was a bit 'cold', but he didnt took it wrong and he tried to explain i didnt need to worry and i realized how lucky i am to be with him so i tried to go back to the 'normal me'. now it seems to be okay, back to usual. thats why im not sure if i should bring the topic up again or not, especially now that he is away with his friends (i dont want to give him stuff to worry about)
i thought a good idea could be explaining him exactly whats going on in my family next time with meet (in a month if university goes well!) so that he can understand why im a bit nervous sometimes and cos some things are much easier face to face rather than through texts.