Back at home... and feeling down.

[abna1]

I just got back home yesterday after visiting my SO for 4 weeks. We had the most amazing time together, especially on his birthday, because it was the first time we were able to celebrate together. I loved just spending a whole month with him, going on trips or just hanging out together.
When i arrived at home yesterday, I was okay. I missed him and I'd cried myself to sleep on the flight, but I was glad to be home after an exhausting trip.
We left his hometown on Sunday afternoon to the capital of Ghana where the airport is, which is a 12-hour bus ride. On Monady evening I flew back to Germany with a 2-hour layover in Turkey on Tuesday morning. Needless to say, my bed was the best thing since sliced bread after having slept in the most uncomfortable positions in bus and plane seats for 2 days.
This morning though, everything just hit me. I was back at home, he wasn't sleeping next to me when I woke up...
What I'm finding very difficult is that this time I know we won't be seeing each other for a while. Could be anytime between 6 and 8 - 9 months.
We've been apart for 8 months before and i remember how difficult it was, so it's scaring me a bit.

These goodbyes are just getting harder and harder with everytime I leave.
I know it will get better in a few days but i'm just feeling so down right now !

[Ejoriah]

I'm sorry you're feeling this way! I think the first week or two after a visit are the hardest. Re-adjusting to your own personal routine while your SO is far away is really hard... I would say be kind to yourself right now. Do the things you enjoy and let yourself cry if you need to. As for the uncertainty between visits... yeah I hate that too. Try taking it one day at a time...

Hugs!

[abna1]

I think the first week or two after a visit are the hardest. Re-adjusting to your own personal routine while your SO is far away is really hard...

Oh, you're absolutely right ! Thank you for your kind words. I'll definitely do that.

[Tooki]

Goodbye's do suck indeed.

I gather that you know how to cope with being apart again, but nonetheless I hope for the best.

[Chris516]

I just got back home yesterday after visiting my SO for 4 weeks. We had the most amazing time together, especially on his birthday, because it was the first time we were able to celebrate together. I loved just spending a whole month with him, going on trips or just hanging out together.
When i arrived at home yesterday, I was okay. I missed him and I'd cried myself to sleep on the flight, but I was glad to be home after an exhausting trip.
We left his hometown on Sunday afternoon to the capital of Ghana where the airport is, which is a 12-hour bus ride. On Monady evening I flew back to Germany with a 2-hour layover in Turkey on Tuesday morning. Needless to say, my bed was the best thing since sliced bread after having slept in the most uncomfortable positions in bus and plane seats for 2 days.
This morning though, everything just hit me. I was back at home, he wasn't sleeping next to me when I woke up...
What I'm finding very difficult is that this time I know we won't be seeing each other for a while. Could be anytime between 6 and 8 - 9 months.
We've been apart for 8 months before and i remember how difficult it was, so it's scaring me a bit.

These goodbyes are just getting harder and harder with everytime I leave.
I know it will get better in a few days but i'm just feeling so down right now !

I can empathize with you(sort of). When I was 11(1978), my mother took me on a pleasure trip to Tunisia. The flight into Tunis was bad enough. I got off the plane by the moving steps. Once I set foot on the airport tarmac, I collapsed and nearly vomited. It was also the rain season and Tunisia(back in 1978) had no bridges. So you had to risk crossing the water flow, if you wanted to cross at all. I remember seeing a number of vehicles that didn't make it across and were floating down the 'river'.

[sarahjane1992]

Goodbyes really suck. I had an amazing first visit with my BF. It's been exactly a month since I've seen him. I'm flying back in about 3 weeks. The day I said goodbye was extremely hard for the both of us. I was crying, he was crying. It was awful. I get emotional just thinking about it! I took the time to cry and indulged with ice cream (LOL) The sadness never goes away, it just gets easier to manage.

[jennifer]

i absolutely agree that these goodbye's suck! i myself have been away from my SO since the past 9 months and now im literally dying to meet him... bt i also know its not possible at this time so im waiting... and waiting requires all the courage u have.... so i wud say stay strong and shed tears once in a while... it helps a lot...!!!!

[jennifer]

[TwoThree]

Tell me about it. I got back home yesterday as well. You'd think that after the ninth visit it would get slightly easier, but noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

[abna1]

This is why I love this forum. People that understand what it's like. Thank you everyone !

I took the time to cry and indulged with ice cream (LOL) The sadness never goes away, it just gets easier to manage.

That's what I'm doing haha. Chocolate and ice cream just make you feel better !
It gets easier to manage, especially after that first week. What makes it bad at the moment are the "This time last week we were..."-thoughts. And the feeling that we were just together a minute ago and now I'm by myself again.
The feeling that I'm missing my other half is always there.

[Mims27]

It really doesn't get any easier but I find that I do deal with goodbyes much better than I used to. Keep distracted, make plans and post on the site. Do things you love. Definitely focus on the positives rather than the negative. Yeah it's hard because all you want to do is be with your SO but somehow we always get through it huh!

My sister once told me (at the begining of my relationship) that I chose LDR because it was easy...oh if she only knew.

[abna1]

You're right, Mims ! I'm trying to do all that. I think posting on here will help a lot, too. I didn't know the forum when I left the last time. Thank you !
Haha that's what one of my friends said once, too. "You don't have to see him all time... I bet you guys never fight... You don't need to buy christmas presents... etc"
Uhm, yeah... NO !