Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

How do I tell him?! Girls &guys HELP

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    How do I tell him?! Girls &guys HELP

    I would love to hear from some guys just so I can see from the other side. I am definitely in love with a man that lives hundreds of miles away from me. I never meant to be in love, & I would even go as far as to say that I am a little upset that I let this happen.

    I don't know what to tell him. I don't know how to say it. I am afraid of the response. I am afraid that he might withdraw himself from me. He knows everything about me. In fact, he may be one of the only people who I tell everything to. What happens if we lose touch? I want him to be happy. I want to be happy with him. But I just can't ever see that happening. I feel like it is a lost cause.

    I don't want to scare him. But I want to know how he feels. I want to get it off my chest, but I don't want him to think I am being silly. Ugh, I just don't know.

    #2
    Do you both consider yourselves in a relationship? If this is the case, then I would go ahead and tell him. I don't think he will find it silly. Maybe he isn't quite ready to say it yet, or, perhaps, he will be! (Don't be scared if he doesn't immediately reply with "I love you, too," though - it takes different amounts of time, of course.) I'm not a guy, but my male partner said it first. I wasn't quite ready to say it back, but it did not scare me away; I cared for him very much, but needed a bit more time.

    If you aren't yet in a relationship...I would bring it up with him. Tell him that you would like to pursue a long-distance relationship and ask if he feels the same way.

    It doesn't have to be a lost cause - this very forum is full of people who have made it work!
    ~~~

    Comment


      #3
      Its very simple really....

      you say...






























      "I love you."
      Made it official: 12-01-10
      First visit: 3-29-13/4-09-13
      Closed the distance: 07-31-13

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by Bluejay Belle View Post
        Do you both consider yourselves in a relationship? If this is the case, then I would go ahead and tell him. I don't think he will find it silly. Maybe he isn't quite ready to say it yet, or, perhaps, he will be! (Don't be scared if he doesn't immediately reply with "I love you, too," though - it takes different amounts of time, of course.) I'm not a guy, but my male partner said it first. I wasn't quite ready to say it back, but it did not scare me away; I cared for him very much, but needed a bit more time.

        If you aren't yet in a relationship...I would bring it up with him. Tell him that you would like to pursue a long-distance relationship and ask if he feels the same way.

        It doesn't have to be a lost cause - this very forum is full of people who have made it work!

        Thank you. I know, it is inspiring, and is helping me to read the success stories. We are not in a relationship. And I am okay with it taking time. I just want some kind of understanding of how he feels.

        I guess it's just scary. To have such strong feelings for somebody that you've never touched. It's scary and hard.

        Comment


          #5
          We have told each other that we love one another. More so in the innocent sense of the phrase. He cares about me and I know that. But this goes even further beyond that. I am in love with him.

          I am completely in love with this man.
          I want to share everything with him.

          I am just having a hard time figuring out how to tell him that, not only do I love him - but I am, without a doubt, in love.

          I feel so lucky to have met him. And so jipped that he is so far away. I can't even love him in the sense that I want to. Ugh.

          Comment


            #6
            I understand how it can be scary to fall for someone you didn't meet in the flesh! Been there. Is there any way you two can meet?
            ~~~

            Comment


              #7
              All I have to say is take a chance and straight-on tell him. Have no regrets, YOLO and all that jazz xD lolololol
              Because ;D I was in the exact position as you with the same thoughts >_<. I reacted way worse, I actually broke down crying because I was so scared. I was an anti-online relationship advocate. Seriously was against those kind of things (I think I even wrote an entire essay on how horrible online relationships are in high school grade 10 LOL)
              But I slapped myself in the face, toughened up and told him that I loved him. (Well, not in English LOL. I was so scared that I wrote "I love you" in a different language. But then he google translated...and...ye..)
              And it was the best decision of my life x-x.
              Just go for it ;o No use living life always asking "What if?" or saying "I should have..."

              Comment


                #8
                I would say just go for it, why hide those feelings? The only thing I would "warn" you about is, don't expect it back. I'm not saying he wont or doesn't feel the same way, but just that he may not be ready to say it quite yet. My SO told me she loves me and I wasn't ready to say it back, so I didn't. And that was ok. I said it not long after though. But he must be able to do it when he is ready.

                "True love isn't about being inseparable; it’s about two people being true to each other even when they are separated."
                Married April 18th, 2015!!
                Distance Closed October 4th, 2015!!

                Comment


                  #9
                  Before we met I said something like "I'm 99.99999% sure I love you and that the last 0.000001% will be confirmed when I meet you". Then being maths geeks we had a conversation about 0.9999999999..... meaning the same as one any way. Then he got emotional one day on the phone just before we met and said he knew he loved me 100% before we met and I was a bit overcome by emotions to reply immediately but the next day I called him back and said I love you to him.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    About 5 years ago, i met a guy online. He lives in Canada and i live in the UK (4,000 miles). We got talking and i fell hard for him and like you, he knew everything about me and i knew everything about him. I told him i loved him before we met in person, even though i had no clue how it was going to work out.
                    And guess what?

                    We got married 2 months ago and his visa application is being processed.


                    Tell him, until you do you'll never know.
                    As long as there is air in my lungs... there is a chance

                    Comment


                      #11
                      I guessI'm not as scared of him saying it back as I am of opening myself all the way. Like FarAwaY mentioned, I always thought online relationships were absurd. Because I know him so well, i know that he, for lack of being able to find the right words to explain, wouldn't find it to be practical to be with somebody so far. And honestly, I can understand that. But again, it is working up the courage to say it. And i have told him I love him before, but I want him to know that I mean it in every sense of the phrase.

                      Even when I am talking to him, I miss him in the weirdest way. I miss the fact that I miss out on touching him. Even just being able to hand something to him, or give him a corny high five Haha.

                      I like the percentage idea. The only ways i have thought of to say it to him is in playful ways, again, i guess to avoid exposing my heart to something that feels so intangible and out of reach.

                      Thank you all for your honesty and consideration. I will be sure to let everyone know when I spill my insides to him.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        I just want to cheer for you! You can do it! don't miss your chance on love LDRs do work, you just have to dedicate your 100 percent to it.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by iloveyourway View Post
                          I would love to hear from some guys just so I can see from the other side. I am definitely in love with a man that lives hundreds of miles away from me. I never meant to be in love, & I would even go as far as to say that I am a little upset that I let this happen.

                          I don't know what to tell him. I don't know how to say it. I am afraid of the response. I am afraid that he might withdraw himself from me. He knows everything about me. In fact, he may be one of the only people who I tell everything to. What happens if we lose touch? I want him to be happy. I want to be happy with him. But I just can't ever see that happening. I feel like it is a lost cause.

                          I don't want to scare him. But I want to know how he feels. I want to get it off my chest, but I don't want him to think I am being silly. Ugh, I just don't know.
                          First, I am not really sure, what you want to say to him. Second, It almost seems like you are tip-toeing are what you want to say.

                          First Visit: September 2016
                          Second Visit: January 2017 (Her birthday)
                          Third Visit: June 2018 (medical conference near her home)

                          John 3:16
                          For God so loved the world. That he gave his only begotten son. For whosoever believeth in him. Shall not perish but have eternal life
                          John 4:12
                          I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

                          Comment

                          Working...
                          X