Religion, cultural differences, etc!

[chizatlauren]

Hi OPer, I can relate with you. To tell you the truth, because of my past experience with my religion, I declared to myself that I will not date someone who has different beliefs with me. Before I share my story,

NOTE: The Philippines is 80 percent Catholic, and the Evangelical Christians and Catholics don't really agree with each other. It is also highly discouraged intermarrying between the two sects.

My ex-boyfriend for six years was a devout Catholic. I, on the other hand is a devout Evangelical Christian. (Those two are quite different in the Philippines) My parents will NEVER accept me marrying someone who is not a Christian, and would never accept someone who's Catholic or Muslim. They're the most uptight bunch of people I know, but I love them. My ex boyfriend was never allowed to step inside our house because he was Catholic, and they bashed our relationship for six years. In the end of the relationship, the religion and my family are some of the biggest reasons why we broke up. We fought for our relationship for six years. But we always argue about our different beliefs. YES, WE WORSHIPPED THE SAME JESUS, THE SAME GOD. But there are certain Catholic and Christian stuff that we always fight about. On the third year of our relationship, my SO declared that he'll be a Christian and renounce Catholicism. So I thought we were okay. Then on the sixth year, he said he's going back to his Catholic ways, and he said that he was just pretending to be a Christian all along. The relationship was already doomed because of other factors, and in the end we broke up.

My advice is, if you really think it is worth the fight, go ahead. Don't think about your family's opinion. It is your choice and it is your life. If you are in the same boat with your SO (in this case, Islam) then good. Learn how to say no to your family without disrespecting them. Love can conquer all. But just make sure, 100 percent sure that you're doing this for yourself and not for other people. It should be a personal choice, because in the future it might become a problem in your relationship.

Goodluck!

[Chris516]

I know you asked for success stories, but I have one of the opposite kind. My former SO and I had major religious differences. I'm an atheist (I don't like using that word but it'll have to do) and she was a die-hard christian (some variation of protestant/reformed). Her demands was outright that I have to become christian or it won't work. That's simply how it was. I tried a couple of times to go to church, even went to a bible class if not two. But I just couldn't bring myself to become it, I was disgusted with the whole idea.

Considering the foolish concessions I had already made for her sake and her not really giving any out of the ordinary things back, I decided that enough was enough and it ended shortly after that. From that experience, I've decided not to date or be with anyone who's religious. For me it simply will not work.

I am 50/50 about your situation. I am a Christian but, I partially agree with you despite your atheistic beliefs.

It says in the Bible, that a Christian should not be 'unequally yoked'.

While I agree with her not being with you for not being a Christian(even though you broke it off). I side with you, in that, to expect you to become a Christian 'overnight', put unfair pressure on you, and was unrealistic expectation of hers, for you to be 'saved', that fast. Also, Regardless of religion or no religion, a relationship has to be a two-way street where both parties contribute to the relationship.

[Ahava]

I am a Christian and I had my hair cut and died yesterday by a Muslim guy
We had great fun together talking etc for over 3 hours.

My SO isn't a believer, but the thing is he doesn't find it a problem that I am, plus I think he as a person with his actions and words is something more than a lot of Christians are and it means a lot more to me.
Before I met him I went on dates with loads of Christian guys and well they sucked...Jesus wants us to love one another. Many Christians get it so wrong.

Have you guys seen the movie Saved!
I think that says it all

[TwoThree]

Princessmaria, I want to give you my honest opinion and I really hope you won't take it the wrong way.

Before I begin, here's my story: born and raised in a Muslim family, in a predominantly Islamic country, I was a strong believer and advocate of the religion, up until seven years when I started having major doubts about it. Now I consider myself an atheist, sometimes anti-theist.

I have a major problem with Islam. Not with Muslims because my own family is very religious, and all of my friends here at home identify as Muslims as well. I can't hate what is such a big part of my life. However, I believe I have every right to despise Islam and to call it a cult.

I get that you're converting out of your own volition, that no one forced you, and frankly, good for you, girl. If it makes you happy, then it's all that matters. However, I'm a bit alarmed at the fact that you might have gone ahead and recited the Shahada (profession of faith that there is no god but God, and that Mohammad is his prophet, for those who aren't familiar with it) without having researched the religion first. I get that you and your SO want to go through this together, but I think it was a bit premature for you.

As for getting peace from the religion, many, many people feel that way, and I guess it's easy if you focus on the positive aspects of it that are advertised by Da'wa experts (preachers) but the fact of the matter is, a lot of bad stuff is kept under wraps or ignored. I suggest you pick up your copy of the Qur'an (you have one, right?) and read Surat An-nissa (the fourth one) and more specifically verse 34 and what it says about treatment of women. Also read up on the history of Mohammad, his biography, his marriages (especially with Aisha) and the history of his wars and his "holy" conquest. You still have fresh eyes and I hope you can realize that much of what is said about his character are pure lies.

I don't want to antagonize you, and I don't want to jeopardize your relationship with your boyfriend. I'm just speaking from the heart because I have first-hand experience with it.

There is the most important matter to consider, still, and I think your SO will be interested because it concerns him directly. You say he became an atheist at age 12, then reverted back to Islam two years ago. Does he know what that makes him? He is an apostate. At age 12, he is considered an adult by Islamic standards, so he doesn't have the excuse of being too young. In Islam it is clearly stated (hadith is quoted below, you can check it out for yourself in various other sources) that a person who renounces the religion of Islam should be killed. Apostates (murtad in Arabic) would be sentenced to death in an Islamic court. There is no other way of interpreting that. Thankfully this practice is only upheld in a handful of countries world-wide, but ask any scholar and he will tell you that it is very much true. So your SO might have reverted back to Islam, but the taint is still on him. Reverting to Islam after apostatizing only means that once killed, you can be buried in the Islamic fashion. Apparently he lives in a very tolerant environment, so I'm happy for him. However, have you considered yourself? Did you know about this? Do you realize that if you convert, and advertise your conversion, and then decide that Islam is not for you, you are fair game to any lunatic who would decide it's his mission from god to rid the earth of the worst creatures there are? (in orthodox Islam, apostates are hated more than the Jews, that should tell you something)

Think about what I'm telling you. You don't have to lose your boyfriend over this, and you can still marry him, because in the Qur'an it says that a muslim man can marry a christian/jewish woman without forcing her to convert. In fact the prophet himself had a christian concubine. So there you go.

No advice about how to approach the subject with your parents because I'm still trying to figure that out for myself. Good luck.


"2171. Narrated 'Abdullah: The Prophet said, "The blood of a Muslim, who confesses that Lâ ilâha ill-Allâh (there is no god but Allâh), cannot be shed except in three cases: 1. Life for life (in cases of intentional murders without right i.e., in Al-Qisâs – Law of Equality in punishment); 2. A married person who commits illegal sexual intercourse; and 3. The one who turns renegade from Islâm (apostate) and leaves the group of Muslims. [9:17-O.B]"[49]

The Sahih Muslim collection, reiterates and confirms that which is in the Sahih al-Bukhari collection:
"(4152) 'Abdullah (b. Mas'ūd) reported Allah's Messenger as saying: It is not permissible to take the life of a Muslim who bears testimony (to the fact) that there is no god but Allah, and I am the Messenger of Allah, but in one of the three cases: the married adulterer, a life for a life, and the deserter of his Din (Islam), abandoning the community."[50]

[Tooki]

Great post 23.

Your respective families should have no input on your situation maria.

[princessmaria]

Princessmaria, I want to give you my honest opinion and I really hope you won't take it the wrong way.

Before I begin, here's my story: born and raised in a Muslim family, in a predominantly Islamic country, I was a strong believer and advocate of the religion, up until seven years when I started having major doubts about it. Now I consider myself an atheist, sometimes anti-theist.

I have a major problem with Islam. Not with Muslims because my own family is very religious, and all of my friends here at home identify as Muslims as well. I can't hate what is such a big part of my life. However, I believe I have every right to despise Islam and to call it a cult.

I get that you're converting out of your own volition, that no one forced you, and frankly, good for you, girl. If it makes you happy, then it's all that matters. However, I'm a bit alarmed at the fact that you might have gone ahead and recited the Shahada (profession of faith that there is no god but God, and that Mohammad is his prophet, for those who aren't familiar with it) without having researched the religion first. I get that you and your SO want to go through this together, but I think it was a bit premature for you.

As for getting peace from the religion, many, many people feel that way, and I guess it's easy if you focus on the positive aspects of it that are advertised by Da'wa experts (preachers) but the fact of the matter is, a lot of bad stuff is kept under wraps or ignored. I suggest you pick up your copy of the Qur'an (you have one, right?) and read Surat An-nissa (the fourth one) and more specifically verse 34 and what it says about treatment of women. Also read up on the history of Mohammad, his biography, his marriages (especially with Aisha) and the history of his wars and his "holy" conquest. You still have fresh eyes and I hope you can realize that much of what is said about his character are pure lies.

I don't want to antagonize you, and I don't want to jeopardize your relationship with your boyfriend. I'm just speaking from the heart because I have first-hand experience with it.

There is the most important matter to consider, still, and I think your SO will be interested because it concerns him directly. You say he became an atheist at age 12, then reverted back to Islam two years ago. Does he know what that makes him? He is an apostate. At age 12, he is considered an adult by Islamic standards, so he doesn't have the excuse of being too young. In Islam it is clearly stated (hadith is quoted below, you can check it out for yourself in various other sources) that a person who renounces the religion of Islam should be killed. Apostates (murtad in Arabic) would be sentenced to death in an Islamic court. There is no other way of interpreting that. Thankfully this practice is only upheld in a handful of countries world-wide, but ask any scholar and he will tell you that it is very much true. So your SO might have reverted back to Islam, but the taint is still on him. Reverting to Islam after apostatizing only means that once killed, you can be buried in the Islamic fashion. Apparently he lives in a very tolerant environment, so I'm happy for him. However, have you considered yourself? Did you know about this? Do you realize that if you convert, and advertise your conversion, and then decide that Islam is not for you, you are fair game to any lunatic who would decide it's his mission from god to rid the earth of the worst creatures there are? (in orthodox Islam, apostates are hates more than the Jews, that should tell you something)

Think about what I'm telling you. You don't have to lose your boyfriend over this, and you can still marry him, because in the Qur'an it says that a muslim man can marry a christian/jewish woman without forcing her to convert. In fact the prophet himself had a christian concubine. So there you go.

No advice about how to approach the subject with your parents because I'm still trying to figure that out for myself. Good luck.


"2171. Narrated 'Abdullah: The Prophet said, "The blood of a Muslim, who confesses that Lâ ilâha ill-Allâh (there is no god but Allâh), cannot be shed except in three cases: 1. Life for life (in cases of intentional murders without right i.e., in Al-Qisâs – Law of Equality in punishment); 2. A married person who commits illegal sexual intercourse; and 3. The one who turns renegade from Islâm (apostate) and leaves the group of Muslims. [9:17-O.B]"[49]

The Sahih Muslim collection, reiterates and confirms that which is in the Sahih al-Bukhari collection:
"(4152) 'Abdullah (b. Mas'ūd) reported Allah's Messenger as saying: It is not permissible to take the life of a Muslim who bears testimony (to the fact) that there is no god but Allah, and I am the Messenger of Allah, but in one of the three cases: the married adulterer, a life for a life, and the deserter of his Din (Islam), abandoning the community."[50]

Thank you, TwoThree! I'm not offended at all by your input. I think the interesting thing about Islam is that the religion itself encourages you to question and seek knowledge. To this day context of the Qu'ran is still being argued and interpreted by Scholars. It is a very philosophical religion and I feel as if (just like any religion) everyone develops their own interpretation of what is transcribed. Arabic is a very multi-meaning language, and with rough translation often used to decipher its text, meanings behind certain words can be distorted. Those that speak fluent Arabic themselves even have a hard time deducing the original context of 4:34 and it is very common knowledge that some muslim men use it as an excuse to beat their women. It is stated several times throughout the Qu'ran (3:195) that women are equal to men (one purpose of a hijab is so that men regard women respectively and without prejudice towards her body). To ignore these things and only focus on 4:34, which if taken in a negative context directly contradicts everything else mentioned in the Qu'ran regarding women and their equality, would be like only reading one chapter of the Qu'ran and claiming that you've read it all.

The same applies for my SO. He is a very good person and has one of the biggest hearts I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. His intentions behind leaving the religion came not from defiance, but from confusion and ignorance. He was lost and in a very bad place in his life. I do not believe he is an "apostate", and what that can be considered to be is open for debate. All I know is that Allah encourages us to be kind to those who do not share our faith, and if any of us goes against that for reasons only pertaining to the fact that someone is of different faith, then we are going against Allah.

17:53, 54 And tell my servants that they should speak in a most kindly manner (unto those who do not share their beliefs). Verily, Satan is always ready to stir up discord between men; for verily; Satan is mans foe .... Hence, We have not sent you (Unto men O Prophet) with power to determine their Faith.

I interpret the religion a lot differently than you do and that's perfectly fine. I've never happened upon a more peaceful religion that honors the belief of a singular God. I remember when I first picked up the Qu'ran and read through surah Al-Baqarah. It deeply resonated within me that what I was reading was the truth and that gave me a sense of peace and understanding. My use of the religion comes from a very happy, peaceful place. I have no intentions of harming anyone or creating conflict with my knowledge of the Qu'ran and Allah's words as I know that some people do. For me, God is love and anything that is not love is not of God.

Without being too offensive to anyone, I've been a part of Christianity for most of my life and I've always found it to be more cultish (I was told to never question God or the bible over and over; Allah encourages you to question his word and seek knowledge in comparison, which is a lot less cultish). My family was church going; my father would preach in front of hundreds and then go home and beat my mother. To this day I cannot understand why it is that Christians call to Jesus, not God, and seem to be fixated on the fact that Jesus died for our sins (and use this as a means to commit sins daily).

Christianity is not for me; the bible itself has been re-written so many times and I find its text to be unreliable, whereas the Qu'ran has not been tampered with or manipulated since Muhammad (puh) wrote down God's teachings. These are just my personal beliefs and what I've taken from it over the many years of being exposed to Christians and the church.

For example, I find it abhorrent how much money goes into the catholic church every year. The catholic church is worth 170 billion dollars and the pope is adorned like a king. Most christian churches require you to donate money as well, but not for a charitable cause. The money goes towards the pastor. In stark contrast, Islam requires its believers to contribute zakat and aid those who are less fortunate. It's little things like that which make me more inclined to Islam. I did not recite my Shahadah ignorantly, it took me well over a year to make that decision and I'm really happy where I am so far along my journey.

There are still many things I need to learn, like how to perform Salah properly, but I am extremely willing and excited!! I'm sorry you've had such a bad experience with Islam and have found yourself in the position to despise it. Thanks so much for your response.

[Zephii]

Seeming Twothree is actually FROM a country where that is the dominant culture, I reckon you ought to put a bit more stock in her words, honestly. She can tell you what a country turns out like when the majority believe in Islam. Canada is great, there aren't many places that rival it's multi-culturalism, but it's still more-or-less a Christian country. It's laws are based upon Christian concepts (I can explain common law to you and how it's developed if you're keen).

Additionally, there are a lot of men that beat women. Religion has nothing to do with it. My father beat the shit out of my mother too. You know why? Because his dad beat his mother, and he believed that seeming his mother was better than his wife, she deserved it if his mother had. There was a time I used to believe that there are only two types of men. Men who cheat, and men who beat their women. I hoped Obi was the cheating kind. (I know better than this now, but yeah... tangent.)

I don't personally have a preference for one religion or the other, but if I were to convert to something like that, I'd want to visit a place where that religion originated, or was practiced by the majority.

[princessmaria]

Seeming Twothree is actually FROM a country where that is the dominant culture, I reckon you ought to put a bit more stock in her words, honestly. She can tell you what a country turns out like when the majority believe in Islam. Canada is great, there aren't many places that rival it's multi-culturalism, but it's still more-or-less a Christian country. It's laws are based upon Christian concepts (I can explain common law to you and how it's developed if you're keen).

Additionally, there are a lot of men that beat women. Religion has nothing to do with it. My father beat the shit out of my mother too. You know why? Because his dad beat his mother, and he believed that seeming his mother was better than his wife, she deserved it if his mother had. There was a time I used to believe that there are only two types of men. Men who cheat, and men who beat their women. I hoped Obi was the cheating kind. (I know better than this now, but yeah... tangent.)

I don't personally have a preference for one religion or the other, but if I were to convert to something like that, I'd want to visit a place where that religion originated, or was practiced by the majority.

I don't see why that should have an affect on my view of the religion. Also, I wasn't saying beating women has anything to do with religion. Twothree pointed out a controversial verse in the Qu'ran that is argued to suggest that men beat their women, which I countered. I was actually trying to say quite the opposite of religion having anything to do with beating women.

America is a Christian country and yet we have killed more than most countries. There is a giant list of horrible, HORRIBLE things that America has done, both presently and in the past. Many of the horrible things this country was built off of were done under the name of God and Christian faith. Should this then negate someone's decision to be Christian?

I'm having a hard time understanding why country has anything to do with a religion that is universal. Christianity originated from Isreal, a country which in present day bombs countries like Syria and Palestine (bombs provided by America, ironically). According to you, this should have a diverse affect on someone's decision to be Christian.

I'm not one to make generalizations, so I would not benefit from going to a country which portrays Islam negatively. It would not then turn my view of Islam negative, but rather my view of the country itself. This thread was not meant to be used for religious debate. It was my own personal choice to convert to Islam, and as long as I'm not harming anyone with it I don't see what the issue is at all or what I need to re-consider. I appreciate the concern but it's really not necessary.

[TwoThree]

I think the interesting thing about Islam is that the religion itself encourages you to question and seek knowledge. To this day context of the Qu'ran is still being argued and interpreted by Scholars. It is a very philosophical religion and I feel as if (just like any religion) everyone develops their own interpretation of what is transcribed. Arabic is a very multi-meaning language, and with rough translation often used to decipher its text, meanings behind certain words can be distorted.

No it doesn't. There are ayat and hadith in which it is said that one shouldn't question religion too much. As for the supposed hadith that says "Seek knowledge even to China", it's been proven that it's a "weak" hadith, and thus most likely fake. Islam never struck me as being a philosophical religion. In fact most of it is quite literal and simplistic. As for interpretations, of course there are going to be several, as with every other religion out there, but that doesn't do Islam any credit, because it was supposed to be the final word of god, clear to all humans, and yet it is not.

Those that speak fluent Arabic themselves even have a hard time deducing the original context of 4:34 and it is very common knowledge that some muslim men use it as an excuse to beat their women.

First of all let me make it clear: Arabic is my native language. I read and speak it fluently, learned it at school from the first year, and I have a university degree in translation. Contrary to what you might have read on the internet, Arabic is no more of a multi-meaning language than any other language out there. Also I have researched that specific verse and let me tell you one thing: the verb "اضربوهن" (pronounced idhribuhunna, from the stem dharaba" ) was NOT used in other other sense than "hit them/strike them". People who say it means "leave them" or "ignore them" or ANYTHING are either lying or in severe denial. It's simply called mental gymnastics, in order to make the religion acceptable to today's society, in which people know better than to slap their wives around because they sense disobedience (i.e domestic abuse). If you want proof that it's not just something "some muslim men using this verse as an excuse", look up hadith about Mohammed hitting Aisha on the chest (narrated by Aisha herself)

It is stated several times throughout the Qu'ran (3:195) that women are equal to men (one purpose of a hijab is so that men regard women respectively and without prejudice towards her body). To ignore these things and only focus on 4:34, which if taken in a negative context directly contradicts everything else mentioned in the Qu'ran regarding women and their equality, would be like only reading one chapter of the Qu'ran and claiming that you've read it all.

lol no it isn't. The verse you just mentioned says basically "Your work will not be lost, be you man or woman". That doesn't mean men and women are equal. Also that verse was specifically addressed to "muhajireen", those who migrated from Mecca after being persecuted. Don't underestimate the important of historical context in the tafsir or the Qur'an. As for hijab, girl, please. The purpose of the hijab is so men can "cover up their property". What's the prejudice for a woman if she uncovers her body? That she be sexually desired by a man? THE INFAMY! The fact that a man would look at a woman and be aroused is his problem. Also you are a woman. I don't know about you, but when I look at a man's bare chest and arms, I feel sexual arousal. Why aren't men told to cover up? Why should the burden of modesty be solely on women? Because Islam is a religion made by men, for men.

I have read the Qu'ran, and not just once, thank you very much. Funny that you should mention contradictions, because it has its fair share of them. Anyway, I wasn't ignoring other verses about the supposed gender equality in favour of just one. I was pointing out a very explicit verse that shows there is no gender equality.

The same applies for my SO. He is a very good person and has one of the biggest hearts I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. His intentions behind leaving the religion came not from defiance, but from confusion and ignorance. He was lost and in a very bad place in his life. I do not believe he is an "apostate", and what that can be considered to be is open for debate. All I know is that Allah encourages us to be kind to those who do not share our faith, and if any of us goes against that for reasons only pertaining to the fact that someone is of different faith, then we are going against Allah.

17:53, 54 And tell my servants that they should speak in a most kindly manner (unto those who do not share their beliefs). Verily, Satan is always ready to stir up discord between men; for verily; Satan is mans foe .... Hence, We have not sent you (Unto men O Prophet) with power to determine their Faith.

That's a nice translation. Another possible one is "And tell My servants to say that which is best. Indeed, Satan induces [dissension] among them. Indeed Satan is ever, to mankind, a clear enemy." Anyway, I'm not sure what your point was, there.

As you can see, I interpret the religion a lot differently than you do and that's perfectly fine. I've never happened upon a more peaceful religion that honors the belief of a singular God. I remember when I first picked up the Qu'ran and read through surah Al-Baqarah. It deeply resonated within me that what I was reading was the truth and that gave me a sense of peace and understanding. My use of the religion comes from a very happy, peaceful place. I have no intentions of harming anyone or creating conflict with my knowledge of the Qu'ran and Allah's words as I know that some people do. For me, God is love and anything that is not love is not of God.

See, I'm totally ok with this. I wish more muslims were like that. We'd have much less problems in the world. The reality is that, while Surat Al Baqara is a beautiful (for the bigger part) chapter and does give this feeling of being peaceful and all about love etc., it's really not the case throughout all the book. The God that you worship is not the God that I know. The God that I've very acquainted with is a jealous, cruel and sadistic God, who claims in one verse that unbelievers will be burned in hell and will be subjected to the most cruel tortures, and in another that "he has sealed the heart of unbelievers" (thus torturing them for something that HE willed) and that he "guides whomever he wills, and leads astray whomever he wills". Explain that to me. Why would someone punish someone else for not doing something, when he clearly states that he took away that person's free well to do that thing.

Without being too offensive to anyone, I've been a part of Christianity for most of my life. My family was very church going, my father would preach in front of hundreds and then go home and beat my mother. To this day I cannot understand why it is that Christians call to Jesus, not God, and seem to be fixated on the fact that Jesus died for our sins (and use this as a means to commit sins daily). Christianity is not for me; the bible itself was has been re-written so many times and I find its text to be unreliable, whereas the Qu'ran has not been tampered with or manipulated since Muhammad (puh) wrote down God's teachings. These are just my personal beliefs and what I've taken from it over the many years of being exposed to Christians and the church.

For example, I find it abhorrent how much money goes into the catholic church every year. The catholic church is worth 170 billion dollars and the pope is adorned like a king. Most christian churches require you to donate money as well, but not for a charitable cause. The money goes towards the pastor. In stark contrast, Islam requires its believers to contribute zakat and aid those who are less fortunate.

I'm sorry to hear about your abusive father. However, you are resorting to a technique that's one of the Da'wa posterboys' favourite, and it's a fallacy. Why would you feel the need to compare Islam to Christianity in order for it to make sense, and in order for it to be a true religion? As far as I'm concerned, Islam is just a derivative of Christianity and Judaism, and they're all false. Catholicism being an aberration doesn't make Islam any less of an aberration itself.

As for the Qur'an being untouched, ever heard of the Sana'a Manuscript? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sana'a_manuscript And you are really mistaken if you believe "Mohammad wrote down the Qur'an". It was mostly learned (supposedly by heart, but the human mind is faulty, so I'll take that with a huge grain of salt) in the time of the prophet's life by his companions, but it was not written down and compiled in a book until the time of the Calif Uthman Ibn Affan. That would be about twenty years after the death of Mohammad. Many things can happen in twenty years. Take that however you will.

There are still many things I need to learn, like how to perform Salah properly, but I am extremely willing and excited!! I'm sorry you've had such a bad experience with Islam and have found yourself in the position to despise it. Thanks so much for your response.

Haha. You are being condescending. You really can't compare your experience with a whitewashed version of a religion that started a few months ago with a lifetime of firsthand experience. So no need to be sorry, I'm doing great, thank you.

Ok, all I can say now is enjoy your new life. If somewhere down the line you realize that you've made a mistake, I hope you drop by and message me

[princessmaria]

I wasn't being condescending, actually. You're just coming off quite bitter and angry and I don't understand that. I also hate how any mention of religion eventually turns into a debate of some sort because there's always that one person that cannot simply respect someone elses personal opinion, lol. I didn't make a mistake in converting. It's something that has made me very happy so I don't think it's your place to say that. I don't even get why its of concern to you what my religious viewpoints are. Like I said, as long as I'm not harming anyone what's the problem?

I'm glad you're doing fine, and I'm sorry if I did come off as condescending but my first impression was that you did not seem fine at all.
Your first hand experience differs in a lot of other peoples first hand experience, so that does not mean your first hand experience is accurate. It means that your first hand experience is simply an opinion. I spent a lot of time with my SO's family. They're all muslim and honestly, the kindest people I've ever met. Again, I'm sorry you view Islam this way and this is the experience you've gotten from it. Also, I think it's really cool that you can speak Arabic! I would love to be able to. I understand some Urdu currently because of my SO's family.

I think I'm going to close this thread as it has strayed off topic. Thanks everyone for your thoughts, advice, and opinions!!