He's back! But..

[glasspaper]

Hello guuyyyss.
It's been a while since my last thread about my SO few months ago.
Hope you guys doin good and well.

So, After few months didn't talk to each other, me and my SO got back together.
He came back and askin me to be with him again, i say yes cause i wanna be with him too.
Things are goin great and better than bfore.
We had a lil fight, but we eventually got back to each other again.
He talks to me everyday makin sure that im okay, eat and get enough sleep.
I have this bad habbit of didnt sleep at all at nite, and hardly to eat.
Last nite i told him that i wont go home and sleepover at my friend's house. And he was cool with it.
Next morning we were chattin and it was fun.
Till he askin me bout the eat and sleep thing, i said i havent eat yet.
And i said i didnt sleep at all last night.
He startin to asks me questions concerning bout those stuff of why i always stay up at night, am i do drugs, why do i seem like rarely to get hungry and blah blah. And askin me further and further till the moment he knows that i have ever took too many sleeping pills nearly overdosed.
He got bummed. I feel bad, and awkward.
I told him im sorry, and he said that i dont need to say a sorry to him.
I said i wont ever do it again, and i already stopped takin that sleepin pills since like 4 months ago.
But he kept askin me whys and hows.

I dont know but lil confused here.
He asked if i have ever stayed in hospital for a mental therapy because of what i did that he thought it likely that i supposed to want to kill myself.
I said no way, i didnt do it for the sake of stupid suicide.
I was just too emotional that day and tired and need some sleep.
And he said it makes him wondering what i was thought that would happens, it could makes me die.
He askin me more and more.
I have ever go to a psychiatrist once due to my depression and insomnia, and i got those sleeping pills from that psy.
But I have never stayed in mental hospital, like wtf.

Today we talked, he still texts me and all.
But seems like hes not really affectionate like before, feels like he is a bit distant.
I tried to keep on goin and take it easier, still talkin to him like usual.
I asked him is everything okay? He just said yes.
I said that i just wanna be with him. He said that he too, and he said sorry he is a lil buzzed and sleepy.
I said okay, take some sleep (im sleepy too, lol) and i hope he isnt bummed or somethin.
He said "idk, just kinda feel crappy today"
Now i just dont know what to do.
I know that he cares a lot about me, but he never been like this before.
Any thoughts?
Thanks

[princessmaria]

Do you think he's concerned about your past or that the fact that you nearly overdosed before and never mentioned it to him could be bothering him? Both of those seem like perfectly good reasons for him to act that way. Considering how you say that he's always prompting you to eat and sleep well, he does seem to care for you a lot. He could be worried about you and your well being but maybe he's unsure of how to approach it because of your reaction to his concerns. You should try getting him to understand your condition. Talk to him about insomnia and depression so he understands the symptoms. I think he wants to be there for you and wants to help you with your issues, but his lack of understanding of how these disorders work prevent him from being able to do it properly.

[Jade_Crystal]

Maybe he doesn't really know what to think and he's still absorbing the information. He had all of those sudden new things being shared with him and he was surprised by them. You tried your best to clear it out, but maybe you should try clearing it out again and maybe show him that you do care for yourself - make an effort to sleep or at least have regular, even if small meals etc. Maybe you could even attempt at consulting the doctor who gave you the pills again, but by talking it out with your boyfriend in advance, show him that you trust him and that you want him to be a part of it and to listen to this counsel.
He probably became very worried and his mind automatically jumped to the worst case scenario assumptions and you can't really blame him with the millions of either OD or suicide people in our contemporary time. Whether or not you were a part of them was up to you to argument and defend, to clarify etc. which you did. Try not to be too harsh with him, he just cares for you and wants whatever is in your best interest. My advice is don't let him handle this alone in his head without some support, but don't be pushy either. Being distant and letting it be isn't always the best option.

[glasspaper]

I dont know but i feel like a bit scared and pushed when he was askin me more and more about the details.
He seems like all mad knowing that i was nearly overdosed, and yellin what the hell i was thinkin on that day.
Then he askin me when was it happens exactly.
It makes me more freaked out, cause i obviously know it was happens on my bday.
And we both knows we had a fight on that day, and we didnt talked to each other after that bday fight.
And then he started askin me bout all the mental therapy thing and said that one of his fam have been stayed in a mental hospital before.
I actually never wanted to tell him bout it, but the way he askin me just kinda pushin me over the edge, and i felt like theres nothing else that i can say than tell him about it.
It was stupid i know, and i wont ever ever do that crap again

[Jimmy85]

But seems like hes not really affectionate like before, feels like he is a bit distant.

Hi. I just noticed some similarities here with what happened with me and the woman I know (she lives in Cinere, near Jakarta) I think he seems distant because he feels like you are not telling him things that are really important to him. If he seems angry at you or depressed , its only cause he is concerned about your well being. He is scared that he might have made you depressed enough to take pills, if you felt emotional or sad that day. He wants a more open communication with you, I think. You don't have to tell him anything, of course, but I think its much better to share these things with him. With me and her, we have total honesty, we keep no secrets. It took me a long time to reveal all my most deepest secrets to her but I'm glad I did. It shows you trust that person. She tells me anything I ask that happened in the past. So all I'm saying is, I think its better to tell him what happened, discuss it. Or maybe write an email about it to avoid the confrontation. Let him absorb it. She still takes pills all the time for pain and she has to be "drugged" to get good nights sleep and I feel bad about that, almost as if I should be able to replace the pills but I cannot