Hey everyone,
I'm pretty sure that basically no one remembers me, I haven't been on this forum for a while..
Anyway if anyone I know is still on here, YAY for staying strong!
(Skip the next part if you don't care much for introductions)
To everyone else, I'm Maja, from Germany, half-Swedish, living in Germany. Used to date an English guy who first lived at the other end of Germany, then moved to England for uni. After breaking up after 2.5 years I somehow slid into the next relationship, in which we kept pretending we weren't in one. He is 12 years older than me, English, and lives in Hamburg where I'm from but soon after we met I moved south for university. That relationship was extremely dysfunctional and toxic and filled with passion which could swing both ways. All in all it was terrible and fantastic at the same time and of course long distance. He broke up with me while I had just been taken into a psychiatric clinic (yes he is a complete asshole and every memory of him and us hurts like someone is sticking a knife into my body).
After my first break up I had sworn to myself never to do the LD thing again, ever. And somehow I ended up in another right after due to me moving. So after that breakup I swore to myself yet again never to get into one of these again.
Yet here I am, back where I came from.
My SO is American stationed in Bamberg which is an hour from where I live. We used to be best friends with some benefits until it turned into more benefits and excessive snuggling and soon before long we realised we were in a relationship. Which scared the shit out of us both.
Now we only really get to see each other over the weekends, during the week only ever if one of us is willing to get up at 4 in the morning to get to work/off post.
And despite having experienced much larger distances and long periods without seeing each other, I find this weekend-relationship extremely hard. Sunday evenings always come too soon and we both always end up extremely sad.
Not sure if having to say goodbye more often is harder or easier than less often but missing each other for longer periods of time.
Anyway now his unit is moving to another post which will then be 2h away from me, putting an end to any weekday sleepovers and Sunday lazy dinners.
And I'm not sure how to deal with that. I am incredibly insecure and have always been and need the physical reassurance and feeling safe and protected thing. I do like having my space and time to myself, but I'm scared that this weekend-thing won't satisfy him enough anymore :/ he's not the type to cheat but I'm always scared someone much smarter and prettier is gonna come along and snatch him away
Any advice on how to reduce the fear and insecurity a bit because I really don't want to put it all on him..
I'm pretty sure that basically no one remembers me, I haven't been on this forum for a while..
Anyway if anyone I know is still on here, YAY for staying strong!
(Skip the next part if you don't care much for introductions)
To everyone else, I'm Maja, from Germany, half-Swedish, living in Germany. Used to date an English guy who first lived at the other end of Germany, then moved to England for uni. After breaking up after 2.5 years I somehow slid into the next relationship, in which we kept pretending we weren't in one. He is 12 years older than me, English, and lives in Hamburg where I'm from but soon after we met I moved south for university. That relationship was extremely dysfunctional and toxic and filled with passion which could swing both ways. All in all it was terrible and fantastic at the same time and of course long distance. He broke up with me while I had just been taken into a psychiatric clinic (yes he is a complete asshole and every memory of him and us hurts like someone is sticking a knife into my body).
After my first break up I had sworn to myself never to do the LD thing again, ever. And somehow I ended up in another right after due to me moving. So after that breakup I swore to myself yet again never to get into one of these again.
Yet here I am, back where I came from.
My SO is American stationed in Bamberg which is an hour from where I live. We used to be best friends with some benefits until it turned into more benefits and excessive snuggling and soon before long we realised we were in a relationship. Which scared the shit out of us both.
Now we only really get to see each other over the weekends, during the week only ever if one of us is willing to get up at 4 in the morning to get to work/off post.
And despite having experienced much larger distances and long periods without seeing each other, I find this weekend-relationship extremely hard. Sunday evenings always come too soon and we both always end up extremely sad.
Not sure if having to say goodbye more often is harder or easier than less often but missing each other for longer periods of time.
Anyway now his unit is moving to another post which will then be 2h away from me, putting an end to any weekday sleepovers and Sunday lazy dinners.
And I'm not sure how to deal with that. I am incredibly insecure and have always been and need the physical reassurance and feeling safe and protected thing. I do like having my space and time to myself, but I'm scared that this weekend-thing won't satisfy him enough anymore :/ he's not the type to cheat but I'm always scared someone much smarter and prettier is gonna come along and snatch him away
Any advice on how to reduce the fear and insecurity a bit because I really don't want to put it all on him..