My SO and my 3 year anniversary is coming up later this month. He has been having an extra hard time with switching to LD after seeing each other practically every day for 2 years 8 months. He is not doing well at giving the effort this needs to continue to work; I am trying to be as understanding as I can while also laying down some “needs” to keep me from losing all hope. The point is I would like to do something to celebrate our anniversary, but I am fairly sure the whole day will make my SO feel even worse. I can’t ignore the date, but I am hesitant to send him anything. I’m worried that he will not even send an extra nice text or anything for the occasion. I don’t want to put a bunch of effort (time or money) into a gift because I will just get bitter if he does nothing. I’m not sure how to keep the day a celebration and not a disaster.
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Maybe it's a stupid idea, but if you know when you meet again you could write a little message for every day till then and put it in a jar or something: like this he ll be able to read a little love message from you everyday until you can be together again.
It's just a tiny idea really, but maybe it could make him keep strong and feel you 'closer' everyday until that day
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I can sort of identify with your situation, as to laying down some needs to keep from losing all hope.Originally posted by az.cmart View Post
First Visit: September 2016
Second Visit: January 2017 (Her birthday)
Third Visit: June 2018 (medical conference near her home)
John 3:16For God so loved the world. That he gave his only begotten son. For whosoever believeth in him. Shall not perish but have eternal lifeJohn 4:12I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.Comment
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I don't see why you shouldn't do something special for your anniversary. There can be times in any relationship when the one is down, and sometimes they can't get back up without a little help
When I send gifts, packages, postcards, letters to my SO I don't do it because I expect something in return, I do it because this is one of the ways I feel I am good at when it comes to expressing my love for him I think, especially at such a hard time, he needs you more than ever and needs to know you are there for him and love him - so if I were you, I would go on and do something for him, make a small surprise gift, show him that I care, show him that I am willing to work on it and that I am willing to put my best in it, regardless if close or long distance. Good luck!
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Originally posted by libelle View PostI don't see why you shouldn't do something special for your anniversary. There can be times in any relationship when the one is down, and sometimes they can't get back up without a little help
When I send gifts, packages, postcards, letters to my SO I don't do it because I expect something in return, I do it because this is one of the ways I feel I am good at when it comes to expressing my love for him I think, especially at such a hard time, he needs you more than ever and needs to know you are there for him and love him - so if I were you, I would go on and do something for him, make a small surprise gift, show him that I care, show him that I am willing to work on it and that I am willing to put my best in it, regardless if close or long distance. Good luck!
I knew someone would mention giving gifts with out expecting anything in return. I generally agree with this, but I also understand how I will react if I put in a bunch of effort and he doesn't. Also when he is having a tough time the best thing is to be supportive but give him some space. I'm trying to navigate both of our feelings, which is probably causing me to over think this. As long as I am prepared for the chance he does nothing I should still do something nice.
PrincessJOE: we have 135 days until I visit home for Christmas so this is doable and may help him feel better without smothering him.Comment
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