I want it to be over now.

[butlerfly]

I just want it to be over and for him to be home.. It's been nearly 6 months and just 4 months left. but the last month or so I have just found myself missing him so much more and time really does seem to have stood still. I' going to Prague for the Weekend in October for my Birthday - his is 2 days before mine and for the past 2 years we have shared celebrations. So an away trip with my friends and to see my Brother is needed. I'm also talking to my dad about visiting him in November for maybe 10 days. He lives in Canada I haven't seen him in 3 years!!! I hope these trips pass the time.

I am my own worst enemy. I keep having these thoughts that he is going to come back and tell me he doesn't want to be with me, which I know is ludicrous! Otherwise we wouldn't be in this situation.

He doesn't get that much time when working on the Cruise Ship to keep in touch and write message. Which makes it harder. He is very good when he is off ship. I always get whattapps messages from him when he finds WiFi. We tried to Skype at the weekend but the internet connection was terrible he could hear me fine, but he was all muffled so he just had to type messages to me. It was nice we were on for nearly an hour and he made me smile lots. but now I've barely heard from him. Well actually today I got a whattsapp message but I was still sleeping.

I honest do not think I could go through this again. and if he wants to do another contract after this one. I don't know what I'm meant to do. It's too hard to be without him.

Just want him home. I'm not feeling very strong lately.

[newrytoballymena]

I think there is a limit anyone can take in a relationship. It sounds to me like you are reaching that limit. Tell him, how you are feeling if he takes another contract.

[AppleDog22]

NOTHING is worse than when you get a chance to talk/Skype and it's not working

I agree. You should let him know how you're feeling before he makes decisions about another contract. And having this conversation might be a wake-up call for him to decide what he's willing to do to make your relationship work. Is his work one he can/would do on dry land?

[butlerfly]

Do I wait until he is home to speak to him about another contract or bring it up while he is away?
Before he went he said he would like to do a few contracts and at the time I thought fine, it will be tough but it'll be ok. but after doing it just this once there isn't a chance I could do this again. While he has been away he has said he isn't sure about about another contract.

He is a personal Trainer on the ship and has just finished his Masters in Sports Therapy.

[Riyko]

Tell him how you feel, i'd do it before he gets off the ship (as most people take up a new contract before their old one is up), but keep in mind even talking to him if he loves being on cruise ships and working on them there really isn't much you can do (cruise ships pay very well, which is why a lot of people renew their contracts as they can't make as much on dry land as they do in the ocean).

[butlerfly]

If he decides to do another contract because of the money he can make (choosing money over me) then surely that can only mean that he doesn't love me like he says he does?

His job in all commission and he only get 9% of the packages he sells. I'm not sure if he gets extra for the classes he teaches. I think he is doing it more for the travel. But I don't see why we can't travel together/have our adventure together.

I'm so scared that I am going to lose him to this. Being away from him made me realise how much I want him in my life. I feel I am a different person since we started going out and feel I don't have as many as the same interests with my friends that I once did. Just simple things like nights out. I went to my friends surprise birthday party a few weeks ago and parts of it not all of it. I can only describe as I felt like I just didn't fit any more. The person I feel I am fits more with him. so without where do I fit?