I'm going to preface this, it probably won't make much sense in any coherent order but these are my thoughts as they come to me. I'm quite upset and distraught so please bare with me.
So, firstly let's start by saying this. She hates it when I post on this site, but hey, some people don't like reason and logic.
We've been together for nearly a year and a half, I'm 20, she's 17 and we live a province apart. Me in BC her in Alberta.
We have never met, we nearly did but I'll get to that later.
Her family knows about me, but due to how my family is, it hasn't been possible for me to tell them about her without them freaking out, calling me a pedophile/creep for meeting a young (relatively) girl online and falling in love. But that's life
She's been getting more and more distant over the past little while, saying she isn't happy.
I suggest us doing things like playing games together (lately our game of choice was animal crossing), skyping, writing stories that were a cross between a story and roleplaying, or doing anything but complain to each other.
Her uncle passed away and the funeral was on the same day as my birthday, we did nothing really to celebrate which I thought was only fair and understandable but in hindsight maybe it wasn't. She did however send me a blanket and a card with a letter in it.
The letter was super romantic, it smelled like her and was amazing how she worded her love for me.
Fast forward a week from my birthday, I was going on a family road trip which was strategically planned to place me just over an hour away from her.
She wouldn't come see me. I asked her sister, she was willing to and her whole family "turned against her" when she refused.
It hurt me immensely knowing that that was our best chance to meet and spend some time in person and she turned it down.
Things have been getting worse at a quicker rate instead of better. Last week I decided to stay at home for a conference and not join in on the second half of our family vacation partly to get more time with her (my cabin has no internet or cell service and I wanted some alone time to patch things up with her.
She said she had no interest in skyping or doing anything that I had planned. She mentioned an awesome friend named Avery, I asked about her and found out it was in fact a him. He lives an hour away and they were planning to meet (met him online)
I was growing more and more depressed and frustrated, it seemed everything I tried wasn't working and the more I pried trying to figure out what was wrong, the more she pushed me away and the more desperate I got. The cycle continued. I told her that I was really stressed and needed her, she told me "I can't be your everything, go seek help or something"
Later this week, she tells me that she just spent the night on the phone with Avery, and talked him out of being suicidal.
She never would talk on the phone with me, regardless of how I asked or begged or went about it. I've been trying to get her to talk to me for nearly a year now. It seems for the past few months all we've done is text and send the occasional picture, we've not skyped in forever.
At this point I snap and decide to give her some time alone, in her defense I just vanished for 2 days and met the rest of my family at the cabin, the whole time I was replaying in my mind what she said, and was in denial that Avery was more than a friend.
When I got back home I was expecting a flood of texts, all I got was "Avery is preparing me to talk on the phone with you".
A single text.
She hasn't said I love to to me in two weeks and has told me she has feeling for this other guy, and he has them for her.
That he's a polar opposite of me and pushes her more than I did.
That we were never in love and that it was just a childish infatuation.
She told me she wants to break up.
Surprisingly, she made a grown man cry with that.
I saw it coming but was so blinded with love and clinging on to hope to not see it coming.
She says it's because he's closer and whatnot and here I am left with an empty void.
It feels horrible, and I'm not really sure what to do anymore, I know I want her to be happy but it seems selfish for me to want to be happy as well.
After some talking she said she would give me another chance and we'd be on a break instead of broken up.
I have a feeling that it will just prolong things and she already has he mind made up.
Reading over the letter she sent for me on my birthday, I don't know how you get from here to how she was when she wrote it.
Lastly, I don't see how any guy with any sort of moral can do what he is doing. Stealing another man's girlfriend seems... wrong and against the unwritten 'bro code'
To sum it all up and put it in a nutshell, I'm stressed out about things in my life and am going through a dark rough patch and my girlfriend is potentially leaving me for another man. I need some advice on how to cope with the breakup in a healthy manner or how I can possibly patch things up with her when she isn't willing to try anything. Half of what I ask her, she turns into me making personal attacks against her to evade the questions. I can't easily explain to my family why I'm so sad and this kind of really sucks.
In the end all I really need is a hug, even a virtual one and now I'm without my girlfriend who was always there for me for the past 7.5% of my life.
So, firstly let's start by saying this. She hates it when I post on this site, but hey, some people don't like reason and logic.
We've been together for nearly a year and a half, I'm 20, she's 17 and we live a province apart. Me in BC her in Alberta.
We have never met, we nearly did but I'll get to that later.
Her family knows about me, but due to how my family is, it hasn't been possible for me to tell them about her without them freaking out, calling me a pedophile/creep for meeting a young (relatively) girl online and falling in love. But that's life
She's been getting more and more distant over the past little while, saying she isn't happy.
I suggest us doing things like playing games together (lately our game of choice was animal crossing), skyping, writing stories that were a cross between a story and roleplaying, or doing anything but complain to each other.
Her uncle passed away and the funeral was on the same day as my birthday, we did nothing really to celebrate which I thought was only fair and understandable but in hindsight maybe it wasn't. She did however send me a blanket and a card with a letter in it.
The letter was super romantic, it smelled like her and was amazing how she worded her love for me.
Fast forward a week from my birthday, I was going on a family road trip which was strategically planned to place me just over an hour away from her.
She wouldn't come see me. I asked her sister, she was willing to and her whole family "turned against her" when she refused.
It hurt me immensely knowing that that was our best chance to meet and spend some time in person and she turned it down.
Things have been getting worse at a quicker rate instead of better. Last week I decided to stay at home for a conference and not join in on the second half of our family vacation partly to get more time with her (my cabin has no internet or cell service and I wanted some alone time to patch things up with her.
She said she had no interest in skyping or doing anything that I had planned. She mentioned an awesome friend named Avery, I asked about her and found out it was in fact a him. He lives an hour away and they were planning to meet (met him online)
I was growing more and more depressed and frustrated, it seemed everything I tried wasn't working and the more I pried trying to figure out what was wrong, the more she pushed me away and the more desperate I got. The cycle continued. I told her that I was really stressed and needed her, she told me "I can't be your everything, go seek help or something"
Later this week, she tells me that she just spent the night on the phone with Avery, and talked him out of being suicidal.
She never would talk on the phone with me, regardless of how I asked or begged or went about it. I've been trying to get her to talk to me for nearly a year now. It seems for the past few months all we've done is text and send the occasional picture, we've not skyped in forever.
At this point I snap and decide to give her some time alone, in her defense I just vanished for 2 days and met the rest of my family at the cabin, the whole time I was replaying in my mind what she said, and was in denial that Avery was more than a friend.
When I got back home I was expecting a flood of texts, all I got was "Avery is preparing me to talk on the phone with you".
A single text.
She hasn't said I love to to me in two weeks and has told me she has feeling for this other guy, and he has them for her.
That he's a polar opposite of me and pushes her more than I did.
That we were never in love and that it was just a childish infatuation.
She told me she wants to break up.
Surprisingly, she made a grown man cry with that.
I saw it coming but was so blinded with love and clinging on to hope to not see it coming.
She says it's because he's closer and whatnot and here I am left with an empty void.
It feels horrible, and I'm not really sure what to do anymore, I know I want her to be happy but it seems selfish for me to want to be happy as well.
After some talking she said she would give me another chance and we'd be on a break instead of broken up.
I have a feeling that it will just prolong things and she already has he mind made up.
Reading over the letter she sent for me on my birthday, I don't know how you get from here to how she was when she wrote it.
Lastly, I don't see how any guy with any sort of moral can do what he is doing. Stealing another man's girlfriend seems... wrong and against the unwritten 'bro code'
To sum it all up and put it in a nutshell, I'm stressed out about things in my life and am going through a dark rough patch and my girlfriend is potentially leaving me for another man. I need some advice on how to cope with the breakup in a healthy manner or how I can possibly patch things up with her when she isn't willing to try anything. Half of what I ask her, she turns into me making personal attacks against her to evade the questions. I can't easily explain to my family why I'm so sad and this kind of really sucks.
In the end all I really need is a hug, even a virtual one and now I'm without my girlfriend who was always there for me for the past 7.5% of my life.
and that's you 
like what everybody else said, you are better off without her.
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