hopeless, depressed and giving up

[Karoshi]

I didn't read the whole thread (the posts are so long, lol!), but I read the first one and I just came here to say that you are really not alone in this. Me and my boyfriend also fight all the time (and mostly about some stupid stuff that he makes up in his head - like past week, when one male friend of mine, who is GAY AND HAS A BOYFRIEND, posted picture on facebook where he was kissing me on the cheek -_-), but when we are together in person, he is the most perfect man in the world. This LD thing just makes everything so hard... Anyway, just wanted to assure you that there are many other people who feel the same Stay strong! Feel free to PM me if you want to talk more

[barret95]

Ahh ... well, that's their problem, not yours! Besides, it's not like you need their approval. Your S.O likes you, that's saying something.

Oh ... well that's something she'll have to work on. Next time, try not to be accusatory when you discuss issues like this. Don't tell her what she's done wrong, tell her how you feel. Tell her that it makes you worry about her, and how you would really appreciate it if she let you know the next time. It'll hopefully make her feel less "defensive" and as though you're accusing her, and a fight will be less likely to happen. Every couple will have arguments, but you can work on making them less serious. And yes, I would want to know, or let my S.O know in such a situation. So yes, I understand why you'd be annoyed/upset ... but try not to be so accusatory in your tone (if you are) and try not to let your annoyance take over. I hope that'll help you, and hope you and your S.O are okay! >_<

They don't know I am in a LDR. I just hear them talking **** about me in general as a person.

Well right now, I guess we're good. I'm letting go of it and trying to move on. We haven't skyped properly in a week and a half. This LD really is a problem, I mean almost all the things we fight about it could be fixed with a hug and reassurance in face-to-face. Lately I've been thinking about studying abroad, in her country. But I don't want to **** up my education and my future career. ugh :/

I didn't read the whole thread (the posts are so long, lol!), but I read the first one and I just came here to say that you are really not alone in this. Me and my boyfriend also fight all the time (and mostly about some stupid stuff that he makes up in his head - like past week, when one male friend of mine, who is GAY AND HAS A BOYFRIEND, posted picture on facebook where he was kissing me on the cheek -_-), but when we are together in person, he is the most perfect man in the world. This LD thing just makes everything so hard... Anyway, just wanted to assure you that there are many other people who feel the same Stay strong! Feel free to PM me if you want to talk more

I don't blame you, I'm writing like a whole essay every post xD
and maybe your boyfriend has some insecurities or idk, the thought of a different Male kissing my S.O makes me physically and emotionally sick.
It's because we're in LDR, with the distance and lack of physically being together BAD thoughts can creep in our minds. So I can KINDA understand why he felt angry or weird(if he got mad or weird).
I totally agree with you about LD is HARD.

[Kitty Boo]

They don't know I am in a LDR. I just hear them talking **** about me in general as a person.

Well right now, I guess we're good. I'm letting go of it and trying to move on. We haven't skyped properly in a week and a half. This LD really is a problem, I mean almost all the things we fight about it could be fixed with a hug and reassurance in face-to-face. Lately I've been thinking about studying abroad, in her country. But I don't want to **** up my education and my future career. ugh :/

Well once again, it's their problem. And as Dr. Seuss says, "those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind". You're not in a relationship with them, and they mean nothing to you, so their opinions and spiteful words don't matter.

It's good to hear. And I think it's time that you should try to Skype properly! And reassurance can be done through your words, when face to face contact is not possible. And when you can't touch each other physically, you can still touch each other emotionally, by touching each other's hearts! Why not try to do something sweet for each other every now and then. Just a reminder of your love and dedication and to tell the other "you're still the one I love". Reassure one another that the other is still the one on your mind and heart. A simple sweet gesture can work miracles! LDRs are hard, but they are worthwhile if the other is your world.

And about studying abroad, do you mean as a year out of your uni degree? If so, then I don't think you could mess up your future, as many employers now look for something different to make you stand out in the crowd, and having spent a year (or any period of time studying abroad) is certainly different and shows your ability to adapt and take on challenges. However, first of all you need to make sure you work hard back home, and when you are abroad, that your main priority for studying abroad is in fact for studying. You will need to work hard while you are abroad, and maintain your studies, don't treat it as a holiday.

Once again, good luck!!

[barret95]

Well once again, it's their problem. And as Dr. Seuss says, "those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind". You're not in a relationship with them, and they mean nothing to you, so their opinions and spiteful words don't matter.

It's good to hear. And I think it's time that you should try to Skype properly! And reassurance can be done through your words, when face to face contact is not possible. And when you can't touch each other physically, you can still touch each other emotionally, by touching each other's hearts! Why not try to do something sweet for each other every now and then. Just a reminder of your love and dedication and to tell the other "you're still the one I love". Reassure one another that the other is still the one on your mind and heart. A simple sweet gesture can work miracles! LDRs are hard, but they are worthwhile if the other is your world.

And about studying abroad, do you mean as a year out of your uni degree? If so, then I don't think you could mess up your future, as many employers now look for something different to make you stand out in the crowd, and having spent a year (or any period of time studying abroad) is certainly different and shows your ability to adapt and take on challenges. However, first of all you need to make sure you work hard back home, and when you are abroad, that your main priority for studying abroad is in fact for studying. You will need to work hard while you are abroad, and maintain your studies, don't treat it as a holiday.

Once again, good luck!!

True. I'm starting to not care what they think. I've already accepted that I'm supposed to have no friends in my city wherever I go.

Ah, I'm in College. I'm looking to become a Psychologist or a Paramedic in the future. But that may change, I might be in a totally different career. who knows
And you are right, it's sometimes good to stand out in the crowd.


About my S.O and me, We're going alright. I'm still annoyed about some small things but meh, it's stupid to lose a girl I love to some small fights right?

[Kitty Boo]

True. I'm starting to not care what they think. I've already accepted that I'm supposed to have no friends in my city wherever I go.

Ah, I'm in College. I'm looking to become a Psychologist or a Paramedic in the future. But that may change, I might be in a totally different career. who knows
And you are right, it's sometimes good to stand out in the crowd.


About my S.O and me, We're going alright. I'm still annoyed about some small things but meh, it's stupid to lose a girl I love to some small fights right?

Hey, maybe you've just got to try making some new ones! Everyone needs some friends!

Wow, that sounds like a good ambition! Well, have a look at what your college / uni offers you in terms of studying abroad. They will have links with universities abroad, and they will only have a link if they can offer you something relevant to your course. So in that case, if your S.O's country has a link with them, then you won't be "throwing your future away" because it would be relevant and would still make up a part of your degree.

Yes, you're totally right. Whenever you meet a little problem, try to consider what is more important, the problem, or your S.O? We all have to make sacrifices and compromises in relationships, we won't be able to get our way all the time. However, they're all worthwhile because in the end, you have your other half.

Good luck with your studies! ^_^