Getting used to this whole Long Distance Relationship thing... It's been hard.

[angelamontijo]

My boyfriend left to Indonesia about a month ago to teach English. Every hour feels like a day and every day feels like a year. Communication between us is sporadic because he's in a remote area and the internet is crappy and the time difference is hellish. We've been together for 2 years now and after having lived with him for most of that time, this transition is proving to be a challenge. It's been so hard to go from going to sleep with him, waking up next to him, cooking with him, showering with him, pretty much spending every moment with him... to only talking to him for a few minutes a day. I miss him sooo much.

Kudos to every couple how manages with this distress because its a helluva feat. I already went through the list of activities that couples can do to make memories despite the distance. They're helpful, but are there any other activities that are unmentioned that I should try out?

We're trying to make the goal of losing 30lbs collectively. Weight has become a problem for the both of us. To the point that we didn't really want to have sex before he left. It was really sad. But I've already booked a vacation to spend the holidays with him in Jakarta, and I want to blow him away when he sees me. This LDR thing has it's pros in a weird way. The cons are way heavier though.

[RachelAnne]

I'm sorry I know it sucks... more so for you because you're just now trying to adjust to it all after spending so much time with him. Sending hugs your way! It'll be okay and you'll make it through this You said communication is difficult for ya'll right now because of poor internet...is there a way for ya'll to maybe write letters to each other? Or you could always send him something in the mail--like a care package! I also agree there are SOME pros: like not having to put any effort into my appearance when he's not around lol, but the cons definitely outweigh the pros. Good luck to the two of you, you'll be fine!

[angelamontijo]

Thanks a bunch RachelAnne!! The support and encouraging words mean so much to me!!

Best of luck to you and your SO too

xoxo

[Chris516]

LDR's are hard.

[ushiwakafox]

Aw, yea especially after spending so much time with him, I'm sure it's been a rough transition. But honestly, it does get a little easier, for me it has anyway. Every time my SO and I have gone through distance, I use that time to focus on my own self growth. This is a great opportunity for both of you to focus on your weight loss goals that you mentioned. Make this a learning experience. It's a new adventure, and it's not permanent. So make the most out of this opportunity.

As for dealing with the transition period, just stay busy. Don't let yourself just sit and stew in your emotions. Make sure you're up and about and keeping yourself mentally stimulated with things from morning till night. And baby steps, take it one day at a time. Focus on little goals, like the next time you'll get to talk to your SO, skype dates, etc. Our morning skype sessions are literally what gets me up in the mornings (you know, besides having to make it to class lol)

I hope things start to get easier for you. Hang in there!

[conejita_hada]

You're from Riverside! I'm from San Diego (although now in Washington, DC). Feel so connected! haha

It is hard, I moved back from Guatemala almost 4 weeks ago and it's difficult because those strong waves of missing him always come up. I'm guessing mail might be spotty to get to him but maybe try sending it anyway. My SO may or may not get the note I'm sending him but I'm envisioning his face with a goofy grin getting it in the mail - at it's totally worth the send because it lifts my spirits, if only for a little bit.

Also, remember the end date. Since he's teaching English in Indonesia, I'm guessing it'll be for 1 to 2 years? It's a long time but 365 is better than 366 (and so forth)!

I realized my biggest "help" with the distance was getting back into my routine - I visited home for 2.5 weeks before returning to Washington, DC and the feeling of missing him was horrible during that time. Now, I'm forced to focus on my thesis project and job hunting (plus spending time with friends) so there's always more to do. So, as others say, keep busy.

Anther thing that's rather mundane but totally fun is using those new "stickers" Facebook has for it's messaging. We just send each other random stickers throughout the day and can basically have a conversation through those. Although, words are helpful, too!

[angelamontijo]

This is a big help! Honestly, the responses are uplifting.

So far, I've had far too much time on my hands because I don't have a job, don't have a car, don't have errands to run, don't have money for hobbies, and Riverside is pretty dead since most students go back home for the summer. That being said, I don't get much human interaction. I feel like such a hermit. I just hang out with my cat all day long, so I have WAYYY too much time to think about my SO and such. I'm most definitely looking forward for school to start, then I won't be so sad all the time.

And hopefully he can figure out his internet situation soon so that we can finally skype!! ( I haven't heard his voice in a while, I miss it)