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    #1

    mothers D:

    so, me and the SO do have different religious views. we've worked this little bug out between us though. there's something I can't help but fear though...
    his mother is a hard-core christian. (i'm not a christian) and I'm afraid that when she finds out that her son is deeply involved with someone that doesn't believe, she'll be completely against the relationship, and me... at this point, she doesnt even know we're together or much about me.
    She's actually the reason he doesn't want to announce the relationship that much. to friends, he's okay. I guess him not wanting to tell her just makes me more nervous. (the reason he doesn't want to tell her is to avoid the LDR lecture) I really want her to like me. I doubt she'll throw holy water on me or anything, but from what he tells me i'm not what she would pick for him... at all... in more than just the religious factor.
    He swears she'll love me. But i'm terrified! and i don't exactly feel that he understand that...

    He's not a big momma's boy, and he would only stand up for me if she DID throw holy water on me, or anything else. Just a nagging fear she won't like me, I guess DX
    Tags: differences, fear, mothers, religion
    #2
    Religion can be tricky and messy depending on the convictions of the people involved. If you SO is fine with the difference and it really isn't a priority for him in a partner then that is the main point. What his mother thinks and how she chooses to behave would fall on your BF's shoulders. It will become important that he stands up for the relationship and draws boundaries with his mom that she must be respectful at least is she chooses to act out at some point.

    My SO's family is Pentacostal and very much active in the church. However, his parents allow their children to make their own life choices and base their opinions on behavior and character rather than a title or church membership status.

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      #3
      My SO's mum is hard-core Christian too, and I'm Wiccan. I've never made a secret of my not-Christian-ness and it's never been a problem. Aside from that one time she tried to exercise my demons in the car before work she's been stellar. She likes to talk to me about her faith, I think because she knows I believe in something and will give her the time of day.
      All I can say is just be yourself, remember your manners, shake off the small comments and keep smiling.

      She's probably just as afraid of you (that is, his potential future mate that will one day 'replace' her) as you are of her. Remember when you finally do meet her that you are an adult - and that you are meeting her as an adult in your own right, not as her son's girlfriend. It might help
      Happily married to the little Canadian boy I never thought I'd meet in person

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        #4
        My mum is hardcore christian and she treied to exorcise me because I was watching Anime so you can iimagine.

        I divorced and now am meeting with an Atheist...

        To Say she's not happy is an understatement, though on ever step I try to show her that despite being unbeliver my SO is a good person. She met him and she can't help but like him.

        So yes, be yourself, she will probably try to get you to believe (Saddly that's what most christians do) might try to exorcise you too and will probably be very unhappy but if you show her that you are good person she won't have a choice that to accept you.

        She can't forbid her son to date you. She might like you or not but the longer you wait with telling her, the longer it will take to accept her.(Or not, there are some people who never change)

        Good luck
        “We're all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness — and call it love — true love.”
        ― Robert Fulghum, True Love

        Met UK 3.08.2012-5.08.12 ->UK 1.12.12-3.12.12->PL 8.02.13-16.02.13->PL 1.06.13-9.06.13->UK 3.08.13-17.08.13->UK 26.10.2013-02.11.2013->PL 30.11.2013-08.12.2013->PL 22.03.2014-29.03.2014->UK 31.05.2014-07.06.2014->PL 06.09.2014-13.09.13->UK 20.12.2014-03.01.2015
        Closed the distance >21.03.2015
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          #5
          If the subject comes up, I certainly plan on stating my point of view. I don't want her to go on thinking i'm one thing when i'm another. as long as evolution doesn't come up, my eye wont twitch. you guy's really helped though. thanks :]

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            #6
            One of my best friend's family is VERY religious too. I know it's not like a SO's family, but still, maybe it can kinda comfort you
            I just met them one year ago and I'm often at their place's to study with my friend, so it happens we all have a chat, especially when we have a meal together. I felt a bit under pressure the first times, for example when they pray before eating (I just wait for them to be done with it before eating myself). Especially with her grandmum. If they ask my opinion I try to be as honest as possible, without 'hurting' them. I just try to come up with 'sensible' topics unless I'm directly asked about it, like aborts, same sex marriages and so on, but you probably thought about it yourself the same goes for religious jokes, I just try to avoid them to respect their ideas.
            I'm also lucky my friend, even if she is as religious as them, is really open minded, and your SO seems to be the same reading your first post, so I'm sure it'll be a great help too
            Good luck anyway!

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              #7
              that does help. hopefully we all can get along. from what i hear, I'm going to get along great with his sister at least lol.

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