Hate to say this

[oxytocinbite]

I am staying with my so until around Christmas which is awesome but all my family drama is really getting me down sometimes...I just want to forget about it but I cant! It is really aggravating. I will explain.

Long story short, twin sister got upset cause I am into nude photography (made a thread about before) she told my mom. I almost could not visit my so.

I went to florida, she messaged me on fb and I told her I did not want to talk much to her since she was really rude to me. Then she said I was being a baby and a bitch, and other things.

Then she said if I did not unblock her bf, who was being a douche to me trying to give me "advice" she would not want to be my sister anymore basically. I said okay if that is how you want it. Then she said she was moving in with him.

I honestly got upset because A. My closest "friend" was moving away and she turned into a judgemental bitch and b. She has only been dating him for maybe 5 months? Which I think is to soon but maybe I am just protective.

Then I just wanted to make sure my mom knew and she did. She did not mind really and then started telling me that "at least your sisters bf is not turning you into a porn star" I am not even in porn, I just like nude photography. Then she called me names and did her usual emotional abusive guilt trip behavior.

I hung up and now they both dont talk to me, other then when I texted my mom and she thought I was my sister.

Im just really pissed and feel down about it all.

[snow]

I get treatment like this all the time from my family, so I know where you are coming from and I am truely sorry you are dealing with this.
All I can say is that sometimes you have to make yourself matter and cut strings with people who put you down all the time.

My big sister was extremely rude towards my boyfriend over facebook, so I deleted all her nasty comments and blocked her. It took us over a year to get back to talking and I don't regret what I did.
I see no reason why I should have to deal with stuff like that, so I simply don't.

So you're into nude photography. It's your life, it's your decision. You're old enough to do what you want and if you choose to take nude pictures of you, then so be it. As long as you don't rub it into their faces and make it their problem, they should stop sticking their nose in your business.

[oxytocinbite]

Yeah, I want to do what is best for my happiness and future but its hard, I feel like everyone blames me. I'm going to miss the way I am treated here.

Thankfully me and my boyfriend made a plan that when I go back to new hampshire, I will stay for a year. Then move in with him and his parents for a little bit so he can save even more money up until we leave to Boston

If my family wants to finally respect me then sure I will visit but if not, I cut all ties..I hope your sister is nice to you and your bf now ^-^

[keyblade]

My family is the same way.
I am the family punching bag, always have been.
I've been the best behaved, most achieved, etc yet I get treated the worst.
It would be probably be best to live apart, but have friendly visits.
Try to always stay on good terms, and don't get into the drama.

[oxytocinbite]

I'm going to try and push all this drama back, I really need to relax and enjoy my time here. I am really lucky , I get a lot more emotional that time of the month. x)

[LilyChiba]

Definitely feel this one and its why I don't talk to my mum. She basically blamed me and my sister for her financial situation. I haven't talked to her since and was even more pissed when she put on a FB comment that we were spoiled. Yes, to a point we were. But I always worked for what I was given. To make a long story short. After my dad passed, she sold our family home which was understandable in the situation. She had about 300k after the debts were paid off. I have seen... 18k? For my breast reduction, car and a flight for my SO to come here. Those were necessary things and I thanked her for all of it. My sister has probably seen about the same amount, specially seeing as she just had a kid. So.. where did the rest go? Boat, motorbike, hot tub, house renos, 2 cars and another house, as well as trips after her divorce, to see a man half way across australia every week or so (driving or flying). So... I don't see how we are the reason she is in the shit? When.. she's been off work half the time since my dad passed, keeps quitting jobs because they overwork her (she allows herself to be) and took a huge chunk of time off when my sister had the kid and I had no roof over my head/was getting stressed because my ex was pressuring me to take the cat coz of his stupid gf.

So yeah.. reasons why I don't talk to my own mother, you're definitely not alone.

[Zephii]

I'm going to take a different tack here. Bear with me.

A lot of things can be solved when both sides understand each other. Obviously you can't force them to see your point of view, but you can make an effort to see theirs. I'm not saying you have to act on it. But it's hard to hate someone or something you understand. Understanding breeds acceptance, you know?

Family is fucking important. I don't get why people are all "oh just cut ties", I guess you don't realise how good you've got it until you throw it away. Your family piss you off? Good! That's what they are there for! They are overprotective and tell you what they actually think instead of trying to spare your feelings? Fantastic! It's a rare gift to have people who will tell it to you straight rather than sucking up your arse. Treasure that shit.

I do get where you're coming from, totally. I've made my share of decisions my family had/have issues with in my time. Sometimes we stop talking for a while because we just can't get past something when it's raw... but cutting ties is not the answer.

These are the people who will pick you up when your nudes end up on a porn site (and face it, the risk is high. Once it's out there you don't have control of it and you don't get it back.) or when your SO does something horrible and lands you in trouble. These are the people who will lend you their last 10 bucks because you need it more. We all dislike our families at some point, and I know most of my family aren't the kind of people I'd be mates with if I'd had to choose, but they are the ones who will be there at the end of the day, the people who will love you and forgive you anyway. So I urge you to appreciate what you have. I wish you could see how lucky you are to be having these problems.

And I wish I could go back and listen to my mother instead of showing her the disrespect I did when I was your age.

[Moon]

I'm going to take a different tack here. Bear with me.

A lot of things can be solved when both sides understand each other. Obviously you can't force them to see your point of view, but you can make an effort to see theirs. I'm not saying you have to act on it. But it's hard to hate someone or something you understand. Understanding breeds acceptance, you know?

Family is fucking important. I don't get why people are all "oh just cut ties", I guess you don't realise how good you've got it until you throw it away. Your family piss you off? Good! That's what they are there for! They are overprotective and tell you what they actually think instead of trying to spare your feelings? Fantastic! It's a rare gift to have people who will tell it to you straight rather than sucking up your arse. Treasure that shit.

I do get where you're coming from, totally. I've made my share of decisions my family had/have issues with in my time. Sometimes we stop talking for a while because we just can't get past something when it's raw... but cutting ties is not the answer.

These are the people who will pick you up when your nudes end up on a porn site (and face it, the risk is high. Once it's out there you don't have control of it and you don't get it back.) or when your SO does something horrible and lands you in trouble. These are the people who will lend you their last 10 bucks because you need it more. We all dislike our families at some point, and I know most of my family aren't the kind of people I'd be mates with if I'd had to choose, but they are the ones who will be there at the end of the day, the people who will love you and forgive you anyway. So I urge you to appreciate what you have. I wish you could see how lucky you are to be having these problems.

And I wish I could go back and listen to my mother instead of showing her the disrespect I did when I was your age.

This is one of the best posts I've ever read on here. You probably won't agree, OP, but remember what was said.

[LilyChiba]

I would love to agree with Zephii but its just not the case with every family. I was lucky I had friends to look out for me otherwise I would have been on the streets when I got home this year. My mum wouldnt lift a hand. But thats fine, it taught me not to even try to ask and just do things myself So it has some advantages and unless I get an apology, I am happy with my life right now. I have my sister and niece family wise anyhow. =D but yeah, out of my personal situation, I woukd agree totally that family are forever. But at the same time, you also create a new family when you have an SO.

[Tooki]

I'm going to take a different tack here. Bear with me.

A lot of things can be solved when both sides understand each other. Obviously you can't force them to see your point of view, but you can make an effort to see theirs. I'm not saying you have to act on it. But it's hard to hate someone or something you understand. Understanding breeds acceptance, you know?

Family is fucking important. I don't get why people are all "oh just cut ties", I guess you don't realise how good you've got it until you throw it away. Your family piss you off? Good! That's what they are there for! They are overprotective and tell you what they actually think instead of trying to spare your feelings? Fantastic! It's a rare gift to have people who will tell it to you straight rather than sucking up your arse. Treasure that shit.

I do get where you're coming from, totally. I've made my share of decisions my family had/have issues with in my time. Sometimes we stop talking for a while because we just can't get past something when it's raw... but cutting ties is not the answer.

These are the people who will pick you up when your nudes end up on a porn site (and face it, the risk is high. Once it's out there you don't have control of it and you don't get it back.) or when your SO does something horrible and lands you in trouble. These are the people who will lend you their last 10 bucks because you need it more. We all dislike our families at some point, and I know most of my family aren't the kind of people I'd be mates with if I'd had to choose, but they are the ones who will be there at the end of the day, the people who will love you and forgive you anyway. So I urge you to appreciate what you have. I wish you could see how lucky you are to be having these problems.

And I wish I could go back and listen to my mother instead of showing her the disrespect I did when I was your age.

I don't agree with all of Zephii's post either but I definitely agree with trying to understand your family's perspective. At the very least, it will help you deliver your feelings in a way that's more effective for them to understand.

[oxytocinbite]

I don't agree but I dont disagree either. I have tried to understand my sister but they way she handled the whole situation really hurt and it was cold and messed up. I have not even posted any kind of nudes online, I am waiting for when I start a career with nude photography.

I dont even know if any of the pictures will be of me or if I will even go down that road in the future. It's just an idea.

My mother has been disrespecting me for a long time, she calls me names even though she says she is joking. I would rather go to friends that will understand me and help me then my family.

I would rather not be treated like shit from the people who should love and try to understand me. I have tried talking to my mother but she will not listen, she just keeps running her mouth and making stuff up along the way.