Anyone ever question your LDR?

[delightful]

I get this a lot, from friends. Sometimes it gets really, really difficult because my SO has such supportive friends and sometimes I just wish some of my friends would cheer me on and say good on you, we're happy for you... instead of just pointing out all the things that could go wrong all the time. It's hard being my age, a lot of my friends still want to go out and party, hit on every walking thing, but I've never been that kind of person... and I've never really acted my age either. I understand where they're coming from, and that they're just concerned for me and want me to be safe and secure in my relationship, but sometimes enough is enough, y'know?

If I was to do this all over again, I would definitely ask for my friends to be more supportive/find new friends who were, just because it really had made such a negative impact on my emotions so often.

[Mims27]

My sister questioned it at the very begining when I told her about it. She told me it was just a phase and that I chose this cause it was easy. There's nothing easy about this! lol Whatever though, I'm not in this relationship for anyone else. And I've in the passed few years that my sister just questions everything. She's not a very positive person. lol

[dizzyupthemeg]

I've doubted my ability to handle a LDR before. I spent years telling myself I couldn't do it, and that is part of the reason it took so long for my SO and I to actually end up together. During that doubt time, I did date men who were closer, and I didn't connect to any of them on the same level I do my SO. Now though, I couldn't imagine not being in this relationship. I've found my match and I'm willing to wait the 2, 5, 10, or however many years it may take for is to close the distance.

I'm pretty lucky in the other people category. Almost all of my close friends are extremely encouraging. They considered me in a relationship long before my SO and I had the relationship talk. My family took a little longer to get used to the idea, but they have kept their negativity to themselves for the most part. I often have people ask questions that seem harsh, but I know they aren't meaning harm. It's usually because they just don't understand.

[hopefulteapot]

No, I don't but my one of my family members does (my mother). She just doesn't take it seriously as I've already been in a LDR before and it didn't work out. She thinks this will be the same but it definitely won't be. My friends 100% support and understand me and my father really likes my SO so it worked out pretty well for me.

I myself actually questioned a past LDR as I wasn't sure about our relationship/future and we were together for four years. This one, however, I've only been with him for about a year but I never question it as I know we will spend the rest of our lives together. I met the right guy and there's no possibility of me being with anyone else as I don't look at anyone else in a "potential partner" kind of way like I once sort of did in the past with my four year relationship. I'm 100% happy with my relationship and would never consider another! I think my Mother just needs to get to know him/get used to him more, see us interact and she'll fall into supporting me/us as well.

[differentcountries]

Ok, I see that I worded the subject badly. I know that others question it, I've put up with a lot of that. I meant do any of YOU question your LDR relationship and what you might be missing out on?

I have always just dated locally. Never even dated someone for whom I would have to take the bus more than 10 min! Were usually sceptical towards the LDR 's of others and so on. But then I met him. All those things did not matter anymore. I just had to do it. It is like knowing a place where a beautiful gem is buried. You don't question having to go get it, because you know the value. It is really simple. He is worth all my money and all my time, and I believe in us.
.

[JoeyBug]

I get this a lot too, "Oh why not find someone closer to home?" Or "You're missing out on some great relationships" usually from people who don't understand why Scott and I are together when there are 4000+ miles between us. I usually tell them that I've never met anyone else that I care for like I do for Scott..neither has he and so it's worth it to us, the end game will happen eventually and we just have to keep going for the time being, until then, we're both happy so people should be happy for us, even if they don't understand completely.

[stormy]

Oh for sure. There was a guy who I was interested in but was at the end of his relationship, once I found that out, we were no longer in contact. Now he is single but I am not. I had a moment of, "well shit" but I know that I care for my SO enough to sacrifice any of that. A coworker of mine put it to me like that once, he loves his wife enough to sacrifice certain things for her.
The risks do not out weigh the reward to me. The reward would be having a loving, forever lasting love with my SO, the risk in finding out if I possibly enjoy another person's company... I will pass.

Also, this could have happened even if my SO lived down the block from me! The distance has nothing to do with the temptation of possibilities of outside parties.

[Flicker]

Oh, I've definitely thought about this. For lack of a better way to put it, I'm a young, attractive woman, and men are frequently interested in me. It would be fairly easy for me to find someone local to be in a relationship with. But my boyfriend is different - he's the man I love. There might be other men who I would be happy with, but I was lucky enough to meet one who I fell in love with, and who I can really relate to - even though we're long distance. I'm not in a LDR because it's easy. I'm in one because I fell in love. That's what I say to people who ask me that kind of question.

[jana89]

Many people questioned, and still do, my relationship. Mostly people, who donīt know me very well, but feel urge to talk about me and my privacy as if they would be my close friends and knew everything about me. Sometimes they say terrible things about both me and my SO, but whatever, I donīt care. People who really know me have been very supportive and that is what matters to me.

As for me, I was quite in doubts about the relationship in the beginning, but as time went by, I grew into being very commited. A fun fact: while being single, there were not many guys interested in me; then I got together with my SO and suddenly there where like five guys courting to me

[hopefulteapot]

I get this a lot too, "Oh why not find someone closer to home?" Or "You're missing out on some great relationships" usually from people who don't understand why Scott and I are together when there are 4000+ miles between us. I usually tell them that I've never met anyone else that I care for like I do for Scott..neither has he and so it's worth it to us, the end game will happen eventually and we just have to keep going for the time being, until then, we're both happy so people should be happy for us, even if they don't understand completely.

I got that from my mother and another family member and boy does that annoy me! They just don't understand.