"Marriage Isn’t For You"

[squeeker]

I liked the article. I was going to comment more but then started blabbering too much so I'm going to leave it like that. I've seen the article a few times and I like the message behind it. I think that it is a good thing for a couple to keep in mind as they go through their relationship, and get married, because it helps refocus why they are married and that just because they are feeling unhappy does not mean they should leave the relationship, because maybe their partner is going through something really tough and really just needs you there right then.

[Lovebee]

Interesting to see a counter article at last. Thank you for the link, lyonsgirl.

I tend to adhere to the description of marriage put forward in The Prophet, by Khalil Gibran, where he suggests that two pillars that stand apart are stronger and better able to support a building than two pillars that lean together. I take this to mean that a good relationship is between two independent people, who are both strong and stable in their own right.

In a way, I agree that marriage isn't all about me. I am happy when my SO is happy. Sometimes, though he's happy but I'm not happy - and that doesn't make our relationship happy. Sometimes I need to focus on myself for a bit, and he gets the same way. Sometimes he can't be the one to deal with my drama, and he has to look out for himself. So, I don't think marriage isn't at all about me - it's about a union, and that means it's about two people together. That's different from each person making it about the other one, I don't think it works that way, but I appreciate the sentiment of the article. I know a lot of people who have relationships all about themselves.