Happy Endings?

[P1nkL3m0n4d3]

I'm not sure if there is a post about this already or not but I was looking to hear some stories about LDR Survivors as I have seen in some signatures. Looking to see some things that will give current LDRs hope and the strength to hang in there in the tough times!

Whats is your story?
How long did it take?
How did you make it work?
Is there one thing that you think was the most important that made it work?

Looking for happy endings!! <3

[pytsip]

ooh! Bump

I'd like to know also!

[Swederica]

I guess i could put my story here.

I met my SO on an internet chatroom the 6th of June 2009.
Even tho it was just IM-type we clicked directly and i remember two days after meeting her i sat on the toilet crying. It was crazy. I had just "known" the person for 2 days and didn't even know what she looked like.
We started talking more and more for everyday and it didn't take long for us to start sending pics and i remember buying a 100$ webcam just so we could cam. We did say "I love you" just after two weeks which is crazy but felt so right.
I also remember feeling so drawn to get to her. I joined an Au Pair programme just to get closer to her, which now when i think back about it is just crazyness, and got drivers license just for that cause.
Months passed and i got nowhere. I had no job or school and there was nothing to find either. I remember getting so frustrated being stuck in the house all the time and finally i broke down in the deepest depression i've ever had. It was so severe that at times it threatened the whole relationship when every conversation we had was about how hopeless the situation was. In the end it came out for the best when i because of the depression desperately searched for a solution and found that i could study at a college that was close to her.
I started preparing for that and i'm still a bit surprised over my decisiveness in the matter. In the end i had to break basically with my family and flee to my dad, and yes flee in the form of spending a night walking around the town while waiting for the morning to arrive so i could travel to my dad.
Despite so much pain and hardships really on the way i found a haven at my dad where i spent the remaining two months until i could finally move to Torrance, California.
I had not met her prior to moving her but i felt that it was the right thing to do and she didn't disappoint me and when i'm with her i feel whole and happier then i've ever been.

So it took me 14 months i guess to get here. Or if you just take the school thing it took me about 3.5 months.
I made it work through hard determination and student loans and didn't let anything stop me and worked hard to make sure the risk of setback was reduced to basically zero.
I wouldn't have done it if not for the depression that gave me the determination.

Now even if it's a happy ending there's always a part after you've ended the distance and well it will always be hardest for the one of you who move to the other.

[garnet]

Whats is your story?
How long did it take?
How did you make it work?
Is there one thing that you think was the most important that made it work?

Rane and I met playing World of Warcraft. We were just friends for a long time, and finally, he admitted feelings for me. I returned them, and we decided to give a LDR a shot. He was in Canada, I am in the US. He is 11 years younger than me (and yes, this did freak me out at first!!!).
Anyway, the first many months together, our only communication was on the computer as international calls and texts were just too expensive. He didn't have a webcam until I got him one for his birthday (five months later), and I finally got to see him live! That sure added a nice new dimension to our relationship.
After way too many months of this, we finally got to meet in person when he came out to see me. He traveled for like 14 hours. I guess longer when you factor in the delays. He actually got to the house the next day, since it was past midnight. The airport is crazy far away, so I got a shuttle service for him. At some very very early morning hour, he pulls up, gets out, we kinda walk to each other on my driveway and hug. After that was our first kiss, which was soft and sweet and perfect.
He stayed for five weeks. They were wonderful. He proposed mid trip, I accepted. We had such a good time together. It was obvious the real life spark existed, and that we were a perfect fit.
When the trip ended and he went home, it was really hard. I loathed the distance so much. He always made time for me, and made me feel like the most important thing in his life, I was lucky in that way, but I was miserable without him here. We did our best though to keep it going.
At some point, I was just so depressed, and missing him so much, seeing no end in sight, I was like, we need to either see each other again, or maybe it's time to let this go. So we did this spur of the moment booking of a trip. 3 months this time! Well, thats what we thought. The border guard disagreed, and cut his trip to one month. Nothing like having to pay for a new flight, (they wouldn't let him change, we just lost like $300) and deal with the blow of losing 2/3 of our trip! We did get to spend Christmas, New years, and our one year anniversary together though. So that was awesome. Best part of this trip is we decided it was time to start working on ending the distance.
I researched my ass off, and we started getting what we needed to apply for the K1 fiance visa petition. It's crazy. I have a detailed description in our website (in my signature) if you want to read about it. He went home, I sent it in. We were amazingly lucky with our times. Things went MONTHS ahead of normal processing times. Finally, he got his medical exam, and passed his interview, put his two weeks in at work, and moved in with me on his birthday. May 15 of this year. We had 90 days to marry, and tied the knot on July 22nd. We still have the road of getting him his green card, which is expensive and a much bigger pain than the visa was, but he's here. We are together forever. We have never been happier.

We officially started dating December 22nd, 2008. Our distance ended May 15th, 2010. The visa should have taken so much longer. I didn't really expect him to even have hopes of being here before September at the earliest.

We made it work by making time for each other. There were always emails waiting for each other when we woke up, or got home from work... we joined in love letter day when it started too. We rarely went without at least trying to get on webcam to talk (we had bad luck with connections, REALLY bad luck) every day. We would watch tv shows together, while instant messaging. We made a private blog that we wrote each other in. Sent the little bits of snail mail that we could afford.
It also worked because we were willing to do anything to see each other. He spent all of his savings getting down here, I sold some of my best jewelry to pay the massive visa fees, and so on. We only had two visits... but when it's right, you know.

The most important thing that made it work, imo, is trust. LDRs force you to have total faith in your partner, or they probably aren't going to work. Friendship too. We were best friends, and not just "dating" ... if that makes sense. I had a prior LDR with a man that I could barely call a friend, and it just crumbled.

I am very grateful to him, and impressed by his strength, of leaving his family, his country, everything he knew behind, for me.

Life is good.

[P1nkL3m0n4d3]

Thank you both so much for sharing! It's really nice to hear that things are working out/in the process of working out for you! It's inspiring hearing what you all went through!
Garnet, from your story, did you feel it was harder to be apart after your first meeting than it was before you met irl? My boyfriend and I met on Final Fantasy XI and though it was difficult not being together in person, after we spent 3 weeks together and I had to leave, it feels so much worse and its a lot harder for me than I remember it being before we met.
Thanks again for sharing~

[garnet]

Garnet, from your story, did you feel it was harder to be apart after your first meeting than it was before you met irl? My boyfriend and I met on Final Fantasy XI and though it was difficult not being together in person, after we spent 3 weeks together and I had to leave, it feels so much worse and its a lot harder for me than I remember it being before we met.
Thanks again for sharing~

Yes. 110% yes. Before we met, it was all I knew. Sure, I was dying to meet him, but being apart was just how it was.
After we met and he went home, it was much, much harder for both of us. After having him here, having physical contact, sharing non virtual things with him, going back to skype and email was awful. Huge difference before meeting, and after.
It does get a bit easier as time passes though and you get used to the distance again. And having pictures and memories is priceless when you are missing your S/O. That so beats the waiting and wondering and "what if-ing" to death that you do before the first meet.

[Zephii]

Whats is your story?
My story is stupidly long, see blog lol.
but basically: Aussie girl meets Canadian boy over internet. Merry-go-round of courtship, heartache and hormones ensues. Five years later girl flies to Canada, and they become official. A little over a year later girl moves to Canada on two year visiting visa, and here we are <3

How long did it take?
Too long :P

How did you make it work?
There was a long time where we didn't even want it to work, I tried to make him forget me, he tried to find someone to replace me, but, it just didn't work.
We understood that in a relationship people have needs that have to be met, and we did everything we could to fulfil those roles from a distance. And, most of all, we communicated openly.

Is there one thing that you think was the most important that made it work?
Yep, friendship.