Kind of sad

[Spooks]

I'm new to living with my SO (6 months now) and the one thing that he does that makes me sad is him eating dinner at the computer instead of with me. Am I being dumb for feeling this way? Is it worth fighting over? He's a gamer and totally addicted to minecraft. I've tried talking to him about this once before but every now and then he still does it.

[snow_girl]

I wouldn't put up with it, but then again I wouldn't date a gamer so I can't really comment. If its important to you tell him to peel his damn face away for 20 minutes to eat with you.

[CutieTii]

Just explain it will be nice to eat together with a movie. Both of me and my SO have this problem and we solved it by watching something together a movie or something interesting on TV or laptop connected to the TV. It kept us interesting and happy that we can enjoy a movie together while having a nice chat kept us off the computers!

Then again we are both gamers and most of our time is spent on computer but if we can get off the damn computers so can your SO.

Just don't over react and compromise I'm sure you have done things just for your SO.

It's not worth fighting over best to explain it will be better then arguing over something so easily fixed.

And yes we do get off the computers for snuggle times.

[Heavenly_Love12]

I like how cutieTii put it. I would just explain how you're feeling and see if there's something you can do together while eating or if he could take 30 minutes or so away from the computer to spend with you. Now, if he only plays when he's eating dinner then it's a different story but I suspect that he plays when he has free time. Just stay calm and rationale. I would feel badly too if it were an everyday thing and I'm sure there is time when you are busy that he could be playing.

[BabyGund]

Can you compromise and have dinner together X number of times per week?

[differentcountries]

Explain to him that you feel special when he takes time off to be just with yo. And that if you made the food, you feel he appreciate it more if he eats without gaming. My husband has a bit of the same problem with me. I dont game much but i get caught up in net or books. He will usually remind me 5 min before to help me mentally close whatever i am doing. And i remind myself i hurt his feelings if i bring stimulies to the table when we eat.

[lucybelle]

Exactly what snow_girl said.

[Spooks]

So I ended up crying and he came rushing and in I just sobbed it all out and after he got me to calm down he sat with me and apologized for everything, said what he did was unexcusable and he won't do it again. The issue is that he's never really had "Family time", they all basically took thier food and did whatever and im used to something totally differant. But all is well thank you all for your imput, glad to know im not crazy haha

[Zapookie]

I would be upset too. My SO and I would normally cook together then eat together while we watched a favourite tv show. It is bonding time and I consider it special. I'm glad that he realised the error of his ways.

[hopefulteapot]

Two of my ex's were gamers and they would do something like that as well. One would rush dinner so he could get back to a game and the other completely ignored me during dinner several times as he played his game on the computer (he played minecraft too). Gamers aren't really my type but I learned that the hard way! I'm glad my current boyfriend doesn't game at all as that's not who he is. But I think that's probably just how your guy is. You should really talk to him more seriously or go up to him when he does it and see if you can work it out. I see no reason as to why he can't give up the games during dinner for you.

[itsjen516]

That would annoy me not only being addicted to games but that he can't take 30 min to come eat with me.
Like don't fight but do say something

[CutieTii]

Okay, I need to point something out to the Non-gamers here: This is our view how we see things.

not all gamers are like this, Games are addicting for a reason if something feels like they have nothing to do all day or they help with the problems in their own life, It's like I'm reading all of this and it seems like you hate gamers for doing something they love? I'm sure if you ask them nicely they wouldn't mind. I'm not trying to be mean or anything but we aren't all like that and no games don't take over.. I never had a game take over me or my SO.. Just suggest when he can play I'm sure he'll be happy with at least some game time everyone needs to rewind.

Making us gamers look bad when we might have everything missing or nothing to do all day so we turn to games. Like I said it helps us to rewind and it has some benefits. I'm sure you like doing something you love and he doesn't complain.


girls/guys with gamer boyfriends/gf isn't really a problem just ground rules will be nice in place for us, In our eyes we aren't doing anything wrong. I hope you actually see it in our view not just your own..

You both make sacrifices rather then being mad over something so simple to fix..

Another point is my SO isn't really social and this is another reason why people play games instead of hanging out with friends.

Don't always think about yourself we like doing something with love.

I'm sorry but it had to be said. Get mad about what I said if you want but its the truth.

[JoeyBug]

You're not crazy, and I'm glad that he was able to see what you were saying and is trying to change that habit...Scott is a gamer, and sometimes he'll be too busy with a game to notice what's going on with me, but the majority of the time he'll put me over the game, as well as time spent with me over the game and I hope your SO does the same too

[CutieTii]

Me and My SO always put one and the other over games even if we are so addicted to the game we still find time together doesn't mean we have to stop, hehe

[stormy]

Can you compromise and have dinner together X number of times per week?

I like this compromise. I think that if you have dinner together most days out of the week that he can show he wants to make you happy/spend quality time together but you are not attempting to take anything away from him that is important to him.

Many people go through these problems, I dated a gamer in the past. I enjoy gaming just not as much as him. We just had to honestly communicate about our expectations concerning it like anything else. It was tough but we got through it even though our romantic relationship did not last. Sure the gaming had a small part in it, but it was more about priorities than the games. So let him know that you want to feel like more of a priority in his life? I hope you two can work it out!