Fatal Catfish Attraction

[piratemama]

Once you have the IP address from the email, you can use a site like this to look up more details.

https://whatismyipaddress.com/ip-lookup


I used to use them all the time when I was an Admin on another forum. They will tell the city and state and the ISP of the IP address as well. BEWARE! A smart Catfisher might be using a Proxy or VPN so if it is wrong country that does not mean it is not that person, but a less tech savy one might not be aware and you could find out it was them if so.

Thank you for sharing this info. I esp. appreciate the idea about the proxy. I wouldn't have thought of that.

[differentcountries]

I am glad she exposed herself so you know for sure.

[Hollandia]

Thank you for sharing this info. I esp. appreciate the idea about the proxy. I wouldn't have thought of that.

Yes, Hidemyass.com offers both a free proxy and a paid premium service VPN. I use the VPN when out of usa to be able to access my USA only "stuff" all the time.

[CanadianGirl]

Wow. Some people... Hope she stays out of your hair now.

[Lovebee]

My SO confronted her about it today (yes, she was at the event, apparently looking on the verge of tears all night). She has denied everything, really tried to pull the tragic victim card. She is adamant that it isn't her, despite her name being all over several emails sent to us, and she totally broke down in tears when he confronted her.

It is so sad that she is at this point, and I really think she needs help, but I'm not about to get involved. I'm hoping this will be the last we hear of it and she finds it in herself to move on. I feel quite sorry for her. My SO doesn't feel bad for her at all, but he's had to deal with her nonsense far closer to home.

Thanks so much, particularly to mllebamako and Hollandia, for all of your tips and advice on tracing IP addresses and the like. It's a comfort knowing that I'll be better equipped to deal with it if a similar situation arises in the future.

Oy vey...

[Chlo]

I was following this thread and I'm so glad you and your SO have it sorted.
You are right though, I think she needs help too. Hopefully she'll seek help and leave you both alone.
Sorry it had to happen to the both of you though.

[Lovebee]

Ok, the plot thickens... My SO called me this morning to give me the latest news. His ex claims that her sister was the one who emailed us, and that her sister did the whole thing to punish her for informing the authorities about some kind of criminal activity that her sister was involved in. We then had an email from her sister (sent from the fake email address under his ex's name) which wasn't really an apology, and asked my SO to forgive his ex and help her with an eating disorder and some nightmares.

Then there was another email from his ex, saying she didn't send the original messages, and she'll do anything to keep my SO's friendship and prove it wasn't her.

Something in this just doesn't add up for me. If her sister is punishing her, this is a pretty complex and weird way to go about it. Her sister claimed not to be sorry for what she did because she wanted to punish the ex, but in the same sentence says she's worried about her for not eating and wants my SO to act as a counsellor for the ex and her terrible nightmares. It makes no sense to me. There was no name from the sister on her apology email, I don't even know what the sister's name is to check up on this story. The writing style in both emails is really similar... I wonder if, Catfish style, her "truth" is another lie in the hope of salvaging a friendship. Maybe I'm just being overly suspicious.

I don't want my SO to pursue this any further, I think we both need to just walk away and cut her off, but I also don't feel like this is over. It's uncomfortable.

[CanadianGirl]

I feel bad she's so caught up in this. The 'sister' thing is definitely just something she came up with. She needs help, but in no way is your SO responsible for it.. I think completely ignoring any and all contact is the way to go.

[differentcountries]

The sister I am not buying. It is very common for people to claim their account to be taken over. She seem to be very hung up. Dont give her any more attention, just let it go.

[Chlo]

I agree with differentcountries, I think you and your SO are best off just ignoring it all. She wants attention, and it seems she's getting it! I'd say delete and forget.
Best of luck!

[Ahava]

Wow...some people.
I hope you can get something else to think of.

Yeah it does seem that the whole sister thing is made up. You (your so) has two choices either to get involved and help get her help (probably what she wants) or cut of all connections and ignore her.

[Lovebee]

Thanks for your support, guys. Really appreciate it. Being so far away from my SO while this is happening is pretty crappy!

[piratemama]

I don't want my SO to pursue this any further, I think we both need to just walk away and cut her off, but I also don't feel like this is over. It's uncomfortable.

I agree with you here. I hope your SO can end this quickly. Sorry you've had this aggravation.

[Karringtyn]

I am SO glad the two of you are remaining strong through this though!! I also don't buy the "sister" thing. This "girl" needs help.

[.:*Shaunna*:.]

She sounds like a complete nutcase. She is trying anything and everything to stay relevant in some way in his life. I agree with you, I think you both need to walk away and just cut contact