The feeling at the beginning of a meeting

[neiiin]

Well, the title is a bit difficult but says it all.
Those of you how can meet your SO every once in a while may know this feeling.
At the very start it may be a bit difficult to synchronize with your SO. She feels strange. It doesn't feel like last time, when you were so used to each other. Usually, after some hugs this feeling disapears, but in case it doesn't work immediatly..
Do you have any tips how to smoothen this assimilation?

[SaraHonRara]

For us, it was like that the first couple of times. We´re really lucky and see each other at least once a month. But after a while, when we spoken more on skype in between meetings and met up several times the feeling went away.

I don´t really know if that is a good tip, but I think as you know each other better and better it will help :-)

And I still have butterflies in my stomach every time the trains enters the platform.

[differentcountries]

I think it depends a little how often you see each other. Because after a couple of weeks I still remember him vividly, but now that two months have past, it is a bit blurry. For me, it is harder because we can't touch each other like we want to when out in public. But touching him somehow, even if just holding his hand, really
helps. Also, I like to touch his face or put my hand in front of it just to see that there is no screen (Skype) between us! I really want to meet every four weeks if I can afford it and my boss lets me shift around workdays. After a couple of jokes and a kiss, all goes back to normal

[rufuz]

I felt the same when I visited my SO again in December after we came together in September. I was soooo excited on the plane and couldn't wait to get there and I've always imagined it to be such a romantic situation to see each other again. But it was so strange.

When I left the plane I still felt happy but then I had to wait for 2 and a half hours to get my passport checked I was sweating and smelling bad and carrying my luggage was way to much. When I came outside I was really desperate because I couldn't find him anywhere... But when I did I was going slowly over to him and we just gave each other a long hug but I couldn't even be happy about the flowers he gave me because I was so exhausted from all the waiting.

The way back from the airport to his house was really weird. I had to get used to talking english again and I acted a little shy, but he did too. I was just hoping he didn't lose his feelings for me in the time we were apart. But when we arrived at the house the situation got better from minute to minute. I think it's normal that you have to get used to each other again even more if you have to speak in another language. I don't really have any advice, I would just say give it a little time and everything will be as fine as last time you were together. I know it is annoying but I think there's not much to do about it...

[squeeker]

My SO and I talked a lot on webcam (skype, oovoo, etc) for over a year before we met in person, and we already were pretty comfortable with each other, though of course the first meeting was exceptionally nerve wracking. Though also exciting of course!! I remember when we saw each other for the first time, there was a moment of "ahh what do we do" nervousness, but he opened his arms right away to hug me, and that helped a lot and the nervousness went away, and basically then we realized we were the same people who had been talking over the internet the whole time... I remember the first few moments I was so giggly and excitable, kept looking at him and smiling and excited and felt like it was so crazy that I was actually with him in person. It felt like a dream really! lol

And then there have been 3 other visits after that, in varying lengths.. and there's always maybe been a bit of nervousness in the first few seconds/maybe up to a minute or something, I'm not sure, I don't keep track of the time in those moments, where it's a bit nerve wracking. But I think the longer we have been together, the more visits we have, and the longer we are a couple and talking every day via the internet if we can't be together in person, the quicker it is to just get back to normal and how we were the last visit, though typically I have noticed how we have always grown a bit since our last visit, in a good way, we've grown closer together. But there is still a bit of nerves at the beginning of a visit, but they go away quick after we get used to each other again.

I think the biggest tip I could give.. if you are scared of things being awkward at first until you get used to each other.. be the first person to hug your partner! It can be scary but it lets your partner know that everything is good and you still are the same and love them and everything and then your partner will likely hug you back and maybe it will ease the awkwardness faster!

EDIT:

After reading some of the other replies and thinking about it a bit.. I realized I do have a bit longer of a warm up period. I get comfortable and warmed up with my boyfriend really quickly, within a few hours of seeing him again tops because we talk all the time when we are apart anyways so not much has changed. But I do take a long time to warm up to the other things.. like for example, I was just thinking about in my last visit.. at the beginning of a visit, I always seem to be nervous again about walking around the house without my boyfriend.. because he lives with his dad too. I get nervous to go downstairs to make food without my boyfriend. I think it's because I don't talk to his dad as much in general and we don't click as well, he's great and all but I don't want to talk to him as much as my boyfriend, obviously. I know last time.. near the end of my almost 2 month visit in the summer, I was just about getting comfortable again with doing tasks around the house, laundry and cooking and stuff. Well I get used to cooking pretty easily most of the time but it takes me longer than just warming up and being comfortable with him. We always take it easy basically the whole trip so there's never anything too stressful.. It's always so relaxing.. and just good being around him. But yes, I'd like to clarify that I do go through a bit of a "getting used to it again" period of time.

[alittlemind]

I seriously thought I was the only one who felt this! Glad to know it is normal. My SO and I were close-distance before long distance, and it had been 4 1/2 months apart when we saw each other in December and when I met him at this airport it was SO WEIRD. He didn't feel real to me at that moment. But it only took a few hours or so and it went away.

I don't really have any tips, but as the others said I think the more comfortable you get with eachother the less this feeling will happen. It all depends on how often you see each other and also could depend on both of your personalities. I'm sure it'll smoothen out on it's own. Good luck.

[NerdyChick]

I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who takes a while to get comfortable with closed distance again. Tbh, after a 9.5 hour overnight flight and then an hour through customs, I also just feel sweaty and nervous. We usually go 6 months between visits, and honestly the first visit, I vaguely remember getting off the plane and arriving at his family's home. The second visit (which took place this December) I noticed that there is a period of adjustment for me. Getting used to sharing the same space and things again (I live alone and don't have many people nearby, so hugs are things I go months without) It takes me about a day to get over jet lag (so some periodic sleeping) and then one more day after that to feel comfortable again. We talk all the time over Skype, video and IM, but being face-to-face in another country with your SO's family is different than sitting on the couch, alone, talking to your love through a screen. I first thought it was weird that I needed time to get used to it. Like you always hear how people run into their SO's arms, hug and kiss and they just pick up right where they left off. For me by the time I see him, I barely have the energy for a hug, much less jumping and squealing and things ^_^" But yeah, for us, it just takes me getting some rest and then a night of just sleeping next to one another to get back into the groove of things. It helps that we usually just talk and cuddle to begin with, nothing too serious the first day or two, after that it's like I feel completely comfortable again, like I never left. Just give yourself time to get used to your SO's presence again, I think like the others have said, how long you go between visits can play a part, but also the distance you travel, whether you are a high-energy excited person, or a more introverted anxious person (like me) and the circumstance when your not together can play a big part too. For us, holding hands, snuggling, and taking things slow works, at least until I'm assimilated back to the environment and feeling comfortable again, really helps

[Hollandia]

I spend half my time in USA alone and half in NL with SO, but I get this too. During the time apart, it all starts to feel very much like it is just a dream. I think maybe our mind's do this to protect us from the pain of being apart so much. It usually takes me a few days to feel "normal" again each time we see each.

[xanzbarr]

How about..... put a big smile on your face and run up and hug and kiss him right away!

[.random.person.]

I'm glad I'm not the only one! We've known each other for 5 years (only get to visit once a year), and every single time without fail I suddenly turn all shy when we're finally face-to-face. Within the last couple of months we've FINALLY been able to video-chat about once a week, and at first those made me really nervous and shy too. But since we've been doing them so often I've been a lot less anxious during our first couple of seconds talking. After those first few seconds, everything's fine! I have a feeling that being able to talk to his face now (even if only on a screen), and not simply his disembodied voice, is going to make our face-to-face visit this summer a heck of a lot easier!

[BlueCat]

To be honest, from memory, I think I've only had that once. One time where it felt kind of awkward and I wasn't quite sure (apart form the first time in which I was just nervous as hell).

But all the other times, I mean, I still get nervous, but it's excited nervous. And then we hug, and even though I'm happy I bawl my eyes out (I honestly think it's kind of a stress release from the whole length of time we've been parted). And then it feels pretty electric in terms of getting to be close to him, it's exciting and even the lightest touch is more significant. It wears off after a bit of time and becomes "normal" But I always loved the first week or so, because it always feels really special that way. I feel like I'm super-aware of his presence, and it's just a fantastic feeling

[Benni]

Also, I like to touch his face or put my hand in front of it just to see that there is no screen (Skype) between us!

B did that to me on my first visit. He touched my face and said "You're REAL!" Because, he said that it felt like he was talking to a virtual person during Skype sessions.

[snow]

@ Benni: I do sometimes feel that the virtual version of my man is a little bit different than when I am with him in person, so I get your SO totally!

I think the only time it was some kind of awkward was the very first meeting, but only because I was just soo nervous about our first kiss and I knew he wanted to kiss me at the airport while we are alone and he doesn't have to share me with his family, but every meeting after that was the exact opposite.
One we finally held each other things were good. Everything was good and we could finally calm down.

[BlueCat]

Pat is a little different online too, to be honest I have more trouble adjusting to him online than when we're first reunited, that's no problem for me, but going back to talking on skype and the net, I find it pretty awkward and never know what to say.

[squeeker]

B did that to me on my first visit. He touched my face and said "You're REAL!" Because, he said that it felt like he was talking to a virtual person during Skype sessions.

Haha that reminds me of when I first met my boyfriend.. I remember seeing him and thinking how much more "3D" he looked! lol Because on skype it's almost like a 2D picture.. almost always just seeing his face.. which is super cute and handsome.. but I love being able to see him from any angle I want, and look at his face and see all the little details that you can't quite see on skype.