Am I over thinking this?

[daveandolga]

So just wanted to let everyone know my internal dilemma and see if I'm just over thinking this...

My LD GF and I have an agreement to talk for at least an hour in the morning every day. There have been other mornings where she has done this and I've chatted with her about it and she agreed she would, at the very least, communicate with me. It's happened again this morning and I'm a bit annoyed. Should I be annoyed or am I just over thinking this?

Here's my perception of what's going on...

1) We agree to talk one morning at 7:00 AM because she has school at 8:30. I am up at 7:00, computer on and ready to go and don't hear anything from her until 7:45 AM. I explain I've been up since 7:00 waiting when I could have been sleeping (I didn't need to be up as early) and some communication would have been nice)

2) This morning she starts work in 3 mins. and I've been up since 7:30 AM to Skype with her as we agreed. Guess what? I haven't heard anything from her at all.

I'm with the opinion that a quick communication "sorry I'm running late honey...I may not be able to talk this morning." will go a long way. Am I out to lunch and over reacting or is this a vital part of a relationship that needs to be discussed?

Let me know your thoughts before I go making an ass of myself. ha ha.



So...I just realized that maybe...what I didn't realize this morning is...she ISN'T working today but didn't know that so I'll soon find out. Maybe this is just a scheduling mix up.

[snow_girl]

I think agreeing to skype for an hour in the morning is a dumb idea. I give myself an hour from waking up to get to work. No way I'd want to get up an extra hour early to skype. Mornings can be rushed, maybe you need to choose a different time to chat. I agree that yes she could text you and let you know she can't, but I don't have time for much or anything in the morning but getting ready and out the door.

[CanadianGirl]

If you two have an agreement to talk in the morning every day and she's blowing you off without a word, you should talk and probably come up with a new schedule. Has she said anything about the morning's just being too busy? I definitely wouldn't be able to hold any conversation while getting ready. Is talking in the evening not possible for you guys?

[daveandolga]

If it doesn't work for you and you think it's a dumb idea...does that have any relevance to if it works for other people? We both have never stated we have a problem getting up an extra hour earlier to Skype...it works for us...I'm asking about the communication, not whether or not you think we are right or wrong for choosing to Skype for an hour in the morning.

[snow_girl]

If it doesn't work for you and you think it's a dumb idea...does that have any relevance to if it works for other people? We both have never stated we have a problem getting up an extra hour earlier to Skype...it works for us...I'm asking about the communication, not whether or not you think we are right or wrong for choosing to Skype for an hour in the morning.

If it's not a problem getting up, then why does she keep ditching you?

[Ejoriah]

What did she say when you told her you'd been up since 7 waiting for her, and that some communication on her part would have been nice?

[daveandolga]

She agreed to communicate with me should something come up and as I just found out...she doesn't work until 2:00 today so she's still sleeping. I didn't know. I thought she worked today at 10:00 her time. This is the only day this week she works at 2:00 I guess so my intel was off. LOL! We're talking in a half hour after she collects herself.

[daveandolga]

I guess it would take communication to find out but I'm not going to assume it's because mornings are bad for her when she has told me that works the best.

[Photonut]

I think the both of you need to come up with a different schedule.

[daveandolga]

I'm quite surprised that everyone is so presumptuous to assume that this schedule is bad for us, even after I very clearly stated that it works fine for us. Thanks for your opinions on whether our schedule works for us or not.

[lyonsgirl]

I'm quite surprised that everyone is so presumptuous to assume that this schedule is bad for us, even after I very clearly stated that it works fine for us. Thanks for your opinions on whether our schedule works for us or not.

But, if your schedule worked for both of you... wouldn't she be talking to you when she says she can?

[Ejoriah]

Has it been a problem just these two times, or is it more recurring than that? As in, does she usually talk to you when she said she would and there was just this one time when she didn't show up? If this is the case (just the one time), then yes, I think you are over thinking it. While letting you know what was up would have been nice, sometimes things come up. If it's not something that happens often, let it go.

If, on the other hand, this happens a lot, then yes, you will have to talk to her about communicating when she can't be there and your expectations. Maybe she thinks you two can talk if you both happen to be online, whereas you plan for it and get up earlier.

[mellif]

Personally, I wouldn't be ok with getting blown off like that; I'd ask directly for a reason, assuming that it isn't as bad as maybe I think it is. This way, I don't have the worry drifting in my mind later. But in any kind of miscommunication, I agree its also important to be patient. If you're not the confronting type, then maybe don't bring it up right away. If it happens more than a couple times, as Ejoriah says, then you know you've run into a problem that needs some direct confrontation.

[lucybelle]

I'm quite surprised that everyone is so presumptuous to assume that this schedule is bad for us, even after I very clearly stated that it works fine for us.

If it was working fine, you wouldn't have started a thread about it.

[Laural007]

I'm not quite sure what you are asking advice on. Yes, she should have the decency to say "I don't have time this morning or I'm a bit tired". The mornings are always very rushed and to set aside an hour every day is asking a lot, from anyone. Maybe you can tell her "I'd be happy to just have skype on while you get dressed or do your morning routine"...?