Communication problems..

[AussieAmericanGirl66]

You are very lucky being able to talk 3-4 hours a day. We chat on Facebook every few days off and on, sometimes several times in a day, and Skype occasionally. He is extremely busy with his job, friends, family, etc., and I am busy with my family. AND we have 17 hours difference between us, which makes it hard. Sometimes I hate the time zone issues! But it's just the way it is.

[snow]

If you talk 4 hours each day that is a whole lot. You don't need more.

Dang. We LIVE together and I don't think we talk that much during the week. (Granted, I'm typically only home for 3ish hours before bedtime.)

I actually don't know how people have the time to talk on the phone for that length of time during the week. How do you get on with the rest of your life.... work etc???

I'm only home for 3-4 hours before it's time to hit the hay and start all over again! Sometimes even less than that when I go to the gym. Sheesh.

3-4 hours a day seems a bit extreme, especially considering your significant time difference.

My man and I talk at least 6-10 hours a day, what of it haters?

I can understand that you'd like to talk more to your SO, but sometimes you just have to suck it up and take what you can get.
Find ways to make the hours you do speak to each other count and try not to dwell on the fact that you think it is too little, it will only make you sad and the time you spend with each other an unhappy one.

[itsjen516]

well i think we should talk a lot more..at least 5-7 hours.. besides he just told me ysterday he needs to be at school for extra 40 minutes for like 1 or 2 months so we'll only talk for 30 minutes before i go to bed:\ so its going to be worst and i have no idea what to do.

You want to talk 5-7 hours a day plus texting ? That's a lot and he's fine with this ?

[80anthea]

My man and I talk at least 6-10 hours a day, what of it haters?

I can understand that you'd like to talk more to your SO, but sometimes you just have to suck it up and take what you can get.
Find ways to make the hours you do speak to each other count and try not to dwell on the fact that you think it is too little, it will only make you sad and the time you spend with each other an unhappy one.

I just don't know how you fit it in!!! With our time difference and work schedules sometimes there isn't even 30 minutes we are both free.

[itsjen516]

How do people talk all day someone said 6-10 don't you need breathing room ? Like my fiancé and I talk at night with texting videos back and forth but that way we can hear each other's voices but still have time to do our own thing and talk to other friends you know

[Malaga]

My man and I talk at least 6-10 hours a day, what of it haters?

And you both have jobs?

We talk about 20 minutes in the morning on his commute to work and another 3-4 hours in the evening - I say talk, but it's more like keeping in touch through text in between chores and watching TV etc. When we're inspired we'll have a minute-by-minute chat about something. It's just not possible to sit for hours on Skype every night. Laundry needs to be done, dinner needs to be cooked, dishes need to be washed. (And maybe that's just us, but also some privacy is needed too.)

To the OP - you won't get far if you fuss about him spending an extra 40 minutes in school. It's life, deal with it. Do the best with what you have.

[lyonsgirl]

My man and I talk at least 6-10 hours a day, what of it haters?

I'm perfectly happy not talking to my man 6-10 hours a day. I confess that I think I might not like him anymore if we talked that much. Or, at least, that I wouldn't enjoy going home to him as much as I do now.

[Mims27]

My man and I talk at least 6-10 hours a day, what of it haters?

hehe! We used to talk that much too...maybe even more! :|
Now it's drastically less, because of jobs and school and life. Sometimes we don't get to talk (other than a few texts throughout the day) until bedtime when we skype (or phone) for 30mins or so. And you know what, we have more stuff to talk about now and our time together is way more interesting. When we talked too much, things got stale and boring.
But if you can do 10 hours and it works for you, then that's great!

[differentcountries]

My man and I talk at least 6-10 hours a day, what of it haters?

I can understand that you'd like to talk more to your SO, but sometimes you just have to suck it up and take what you can get.
Find ways to make the hours you do speak to each other count and try not to dwell on the fact that you think it is too little, it will only make you sad and the time you spend with each other an unhappy one.

I am sure you don't talk for ten hours but the camera might be on for that long while you do your daily stuff. And if that pleases you that is all fine. Me, i would have been driven crazy.

[Blaine]

My man and I talk at least 6-10 hours a day, what of it haters?

Oh, I wouldn't prefer that even if I had the time!

[snow]

Ooops I didn't think people would comment on this so much haha
I was just trying to show that having 3-5 hours and wanting more is not unreasonable, if you actually CAN. If schedules clash and people are busy, then you just have to take what you can get.
There is times I have to get up very early in my mornings and work late/have late classes so we only get to talk to each other for a couple minutes, but those days are rare and we just make the most of what we have, everyday.

And you both have jobs?

We do! He works 40hrs, I work much less, but I go to college too!

hehe! We used to talk that much too...maybe even more! :|
Now it's drastically less, because of jobs and school and life. Sometimes we don't get to talk (other than a few texts throughout the day) until bedtime when we skype (or phone) for 30mins or so. And you know what, we have more stuff to talk about now and our time together is way more interesting. When we talked too much, things got stale and boring.
But if you can do 10 hours and it works for you, then that's great!

We're just very lucky with our time difference and that my job is in the afternoon = his mornings, so we both work at the same time and get home around the same time :P

I am sure you don't talk for ten hours but the camera might be on for that long while you do your daily stuff. And if that pleases you that is all fine. Me, i would have been driven crazy.

Don't be too sure We are on TeamSpeak the whole time and talk to each other. We rarely turn on the webcam since I share my room with my twin and she's not comfortable with being in the picture :P

Oh, I wouldn't prefer that even if I had the time!

To each their own

[sarahjane1992]

I agree that 5-7 hours of just talking is overkill.
When my SO and I met, we just talked and spent time together. We did things together over FaceTime but we just enjoyed getting to know each other. We've been together for almost a year and make the most of our time together.
I work and I'm in school so my time is pretty tight.
My SO and I text throughout the day. We facetime several times throughout the day, depending on our schedules. There are also times were we just want time for ourselves.

OP, I second what the others have said. Enjoy the time you have. Putting pressure on your SO to talk 5-7 hours, especially after just a month together is too much. Take a step back and enjoy the time you have to talk.
You'll enjoy getting to know him more if you limit the time you talk to each other.
Just relax, have fun and get to know each other. That's what my SO and I did. It built a good foundation for our relationship.

[AussieAmericanGirl66]

When my SO and I first reconnected we used to have hours and hours of conversation a day/night. It was as if we just couldn't get enough of each other. So I got extremely spoiled by all that, and when all of a sudden he started working longer hours and my job got me busier it was just like everything had been taken away from me. I can't tell you how bad it was and how badly I missed him. But after a while I realized that THAT was reality, that was everyday life, not the one I had been living at the beginning. At the end of the day, I just think it's the quality of the time you spend together that matters...not so much the lenght.

Yes, the reality is much different than it was in the beginning. Then we were constantly chatting, texting, tweeting, calling, and Skyping. As you said, I really got spoiled by him, and it was quite a let down when his job got more demanding, and other obligations on both sides of the equator increased, too. Now we are lucky to chat every few days, and Skype occasionally. Today has been nice. We hadn't been on Skype since before Christmas, but today we have been on three times, a treat for sure.

[AussieAmericanGirl66]

My man and I talk at least 6-10 hours a day, what of it haters?

I can understand that you'd like to talk more to your SO, but sometimes you just have to suck it up and take what you can get.
Find ways to make the hours you do speak to each other count and try not to dwell on the fact that you think it is too little, it will only make you sad and the time you spend with each other an unhappy one.

Whoa! Cool it! There are no haters here. We are all only sharing our experiences. However, I would like to know what your secret is, as I'm sure others here would, too. How do you find time to talk 6-10 hours a day? Most people have full time jobs, school, family obligations, etc. Add to that the time differences, time zones, and time crunch, and well, you take what you can get. That doesn't mean we are unhappy when we do find the time for each other...quite the opposite. We've been very happy today because he found time for 3 Skype calls.

[snow]

Well.. I don't really know..
We are both big gamers, so we spend most of our times on the computer anyway and I usually stay up until 4am my time, 10pm his time. We have our own TeamSpeak server set up that I start when I come home and is running on my computer until I go to bed. There is short breaks when I go eat with my family, but 6 hours apart, we eat at the same time, I eat dinner, he eats lunch :P Any chores I have to do, I do between getting up and work. I'm off friday through sunday so I spend those days to work on college papers and such, plus on sunday he has D&D night, which basically gives me a whole day worth of spending it on studying - until he comes home at 3:30am where we play a round of Left4Dead2, or any other game.
I work in the afternoon, so I don't have to be up early in the morning, and can sleep in until 10am, after 6 hours of sleep. So by the time we are home after work, (luckily we work the same shifts, who would have thought?) it's 6 to 6:30 and then we talk until 4, rinse and repeat haha

I'm glad you found time for a skype date