Opposing sides?

[MoonWatcher]

Is there anything that you know you and your SO will never agree on?

For example, it could be something serious, like with David and I. He's pro-life, and I'm pro-choice. Or it could be something silly. i.e., his favorite M. Night Shyamalan movie is 'Lady in the Water' (something I will never understand...) and mine is 'Signs'.

What are you opposites on? And how do you keep it from becoming a major issue, if it's on something serious?

[LadyMarchHare]

There's his whole smoking issue but I'm hoping we got that resolved, his drinking (it's not bad, trust me, I just don't like alcohol AT ALL and he likes casual drinking), and a few other minor debates about repetition altering behavior.

The smoking was a major issue because I have health problems, but I've said nothing about his drinking sans the one time he tried doing it to avoid a problem. It's just a matter of handling those things gently. The debates, well, they're just that. One of us gets minorly aggravated and we quit, not wanting to spark an argument.

[paulawriteslove]

My SO is very conservative and I am liberal, so we agree to disagree on some things

[JoMarie]

I think the one thing he and I will never agree on is names. If we ever get pregnant it'll be a nine month long fight on what to call the kid. I hate common names and he LOVES them

[XX, Lexi]

Me and my SO, so far, don't have any disagreements on big issues yet.
We do disagree on things like music and video games. For instance, he likes Muse, Tool and those type of bands, while I listen to more mainstream stuff. He doesn't like my music, so I'll turn it to a rock station to settle things between us XD

[Karringtyn]

He is a saver...and I am a spender.

[Darth_Taco]

Our biggest is that he wants to get married one day, I'd rather not. It's caused a lot of problems between us. Fortunately we're on our way to resolving it completely. We're only 20, we don't really need to worry about something as serious as marriage yet so we can put it off until I move :P.

I am a Conservative, he's a Liberal. This actually doesn't cause many conflict between us since we somehow agree on all the important political stuff. Then one we thankfully agree on is our stance on abortion. At this point of our lives we're not keeping any unwanted fetus D:<! Especially if it's twins (runs in my family). Then I'm getting one fallopian tube tied to lower the chances of that happening again ;_;!

We got some other differences, like my eternal hatred of Dane Cook and his eternal love of the same man. They're all small though and actually just make things between us better. Why would I want to be with someone who's exactly like me? Tried it, gets boring quick. I like this better, works better for me too :'D.

[garnet]

I'm not sure I can explain this right. But Rane and his family are affectionate. Mine is a block of ice. When I first saw on webcam his dad come up and give him a kiss on the cheek, I was so taken aback, omg, I just didn't have any idea how to process it or how to even talk to him after that. The more of it that I saw/heard about, the more I just freaked. He can correct me if I'm wrong, but I think he finds the way my relatives and I are, is sad.
My family is mmm well... my mothers side really wants nothing to do with me, and my fathers side is either dead, or has disowned me. I have a father and his brother, both have ended contact with me. This leaves my mother. How many hugs does one get when they are being told they would have been better off not being born? (My mother is a wonderful person, and the only blood relative I consider family.) There is no one else. I don't find this sad though. It is what it is. He knows that I think all the physical/verbal affection (and lack of boundaries) in his family is bizarre. I am not sure how this will translate into us as parents. I am not cold or standoffish with Rane, and I assume I wouldn't be with our child either, but I do think that at a certain age, I can't fathom it being the way it was in his house. Not saying it's wrong, just saying I haven't experienced it, I don't understand it.

One possibility is that we DO have a semi large age difference. We were not raised in the same time period. Maybe I am old and uptight. I do find a lot of things inappropriate that he thinks are no big deal. Such as walking around in my underwear. I would never do this! Even if I were home alone. I always shut the bathroom door (even to brush my hair lol). Things like that. I am this uber liberal, faaar left person, but I am also modest and old fashioned I suppose, in my own life/way of doing things.

As far as I can tell, this is our main difference. Everything else we tend to view the same way. Maybe he will have more, but this was the biggie that I could think of.

[Rane]

He can correct me if I'm wrong, but I think he finds the way my relatives and I are, is sad.

Definitely don't think that it's sad! It's just so different to what I'm used to, it's bizarre to see as well that I just can't fathom it lol.

Besides that though yeah, I can't think of any differences we have!

[maja]

we disagree on some things, such as our perspective on life. I only live for whats now and dont believee in past and future, meanwhile he very much lives for the future and and often judges things by whats happened in the past.
Also weve been brought up completely different, my family loves doing things together and celebrating lots, we have loads of traditions, so we have big christmases and easters and birthdays, we love cooking and eating together or working on other things together. And we love giving each other preents, even if its just litttle things, the thought counts.
His mum has never really cared for that too much and she hates cooking and stuff like that. Shes übersweet, but somehow she never wanted to create this atmosphere of celebration and cheerfulness. So he just never learnt it, but he gets morre and more used to it when hes here, such as the big breakfasts, loads of different ,new food, or big birthdays with cakes and flowers and all that. I wish he could be here for christmas, cos it really is a hell lot of fun, trimming the tree, decorating the house, wrapping presents and getting dressed nicely and all that
and we dont at all agree on music, he mostly likes house while i prefer classic rock and indie. But oh well

[Caitlin2009]

her smoking as well, i dont like it but i wont push the issue with her since she gets testy when i do but i told her once it seems like its effecting her health i want her to quit, no arguments!! She likes Harry Potter i do not, i never understood the craze with that movie, she likes oldies music(she loves all sorts) especially Frank Sinatra not my cup of tea personaly but hey whatever floats your boat.

[noodle]

The only thing I can think of right away is the use of weed >_> lol
He doesnt do it anymore since we started datin and promised me he wont cause he knows I hate it but if I'd like not get mad at him for smokin it I think he would do it every once in a while. He was never an addict but you know how it goes, friends meet up so yea ''lemme have a lil bit of that'' and that like once every 2-3 months or somethin.
Other than that I think we do get along pretty well haha

[Mio]

Decoration of the house, he has an specific style, and I don't really care.

[Tanja]

He hates Lord Of The Rings films and dance music, I love it.

I think the major thing with us is an engagement ring(s) - in Finland men wear them but in Wales they don't and he said he wouldn't put a ring on his finger until we're married. I find this very odd and kind of disturbing because I'm so used to it and to me it feels somewhat unfair that a woman has to wear something to show everyone she's taken whereas the man doesn't.

It's also a symbol of a promise and I think that both should wear it for the mere meaning of it. He just thinks it would be silly and it's hard for me to deal with that.

[milaya]

Think our whole view on life is different.
Me being European and him being Japanese, has created some conflicts in culture and therefore also a whole lot of things where on opposing sides on. I mean just the fact that I loved being a child (and miss it often) where he hated it and just wanted to grow up as fast as possible.

Whenever something doesn't go as he wants, he just uses "しょうがない" (Can't be helped)
Where I think about it a lot, desperately trying to find a way to "fix it".

He's a smoker, I'm not. I'm often complaining about it, especially if his smoking has increased. He has promised to try to work on it. And when we have kids in the future, we both hope he has stopped by then, but if not - then at least he doesn't mind smoking outside.

He likes classical music and some rock... I like mainstream and rock.
He likes romantic movies, I really dislike them.
I like to buy and own "things" (and I collect as well), he thinks it's useless (but, still helps me with buying stuff for my collection).
I think a lot on the past and the future, where he likes to just think of the present time.
I think about the little things - he always prefer to see the big picture.

He always plan things ahead... I'm a very "Last minute" person. (I would always be sitting by the computer at 2am, desperately trying to finish an essay for the next day.) Includes all planning actually. Packing, moving, homework, travel, payments... etc.

I think the major thing with us is an engagement ring(s) - in Finland men wear them but in Wales they don't and he said he wouldn't put a ring on his finger until we're married. I find this very odd and kind of disturbing because I'm so used to it and to me it feels somewhat unfair that a woman has to wear something to show everyone she's taken whereas the man doesn't.

It's also a symbol of a promise and I think that both should wear it for the mere meaning of it. He just thinks it would be silly and it's hard for me to deal with that.

I'm not even sure what the norm is here in Denmark, but I don't care much.
My boyfriend asked if I wanted him to wear a ring as well, then I just told him I didn't care (as long as he gave me one XD) If he wanted to wear it, fine. If not, also fine. So it's just me getting a ring XD