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Im trying my best...

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    Im trying my best...

    Well hello everyone, I know that it has been ages since ive posted anything and so I hope you dont mind my possibly not so little rant...
    I am very excited to say that I will be seeing my SO again very soon, 17 days to be exact! And with all of my excitement comes this weird feeling that after I come home nothing will be the same. And with good reason. You see, I am the youngest of 3 and while I am away on my trip my oldest sister is going to be moving away for college. If anyone has followed some of my previous posts, then you know my sister isnt exactly a fan of my relationship...actually no one on my side really cares for it much. So ive been getting all kinds of grief about not being here the day she moves out...the only thing that is making all the pressure bearable is the fact that the day she moves out my parents are also flying out of state to visit my older brother.

    Ive always had siblings or friends in and out. Well now when i come home from my visit my house will be empty. Two of my closest and best friends are going on study abroad year long programs. And I am so so so so so very excited for them! its such a fantastic opportunity! and my sister will also be gone. So, that leaves myself, my mother and my step father, a man who has been trying to convince me my boyfriend is cheating on me. so,naturally im terrified I will come home from my visit feeling terribly alone in my own home.
    Please dont get me wrong, I know there are people around who love me dearly.

    So this brings m to my current situation, with my SO. He is a very kind and caring young man, when we are in the same place. However, when we are apart he tends to distance himself emotionally...ive been feeling lonely lately and I opened up to him about it yesterday. We planned to skype and then talk all about why ive been feeling a little off lately. So i waited. and waited. and waited...and finally at 2 am his time he called and said we wouldnt be skyping. I guess i just feel like opening up to him back fired because today he said that hes going out with friends and hell call me tonight, well i work late and he knows that...
    idk....was opening up the wrong thing? i got my hopes up that we could finally skype after what feels like months and then it didnt happen...i just dont want to over anaalyze this....

    i know it all sounds jumbled and crazy so if you have questions please ask! id love any advice youre willing to give!

    #2
    I would be mad/hurt, too, if I opened up to my SO and he didn't "show up" for a Skype session or phone call. It shouldn't be wrong to open up to an SO. I would let him know his actions send a message of trivializing your feelings. It sounds like the change at home will take a lot of adjustment and it sucks when the support network leaves, even if it's for awesome opportunities like study abroad. Is it possible to get involved in a few more activities or volunteering once you're back home from your trip? Trying to busy yourself in place of the friend support that will be overseas?
    I'd talk to the SO about it, again, and see what happens. When I've felt like I have no one to turn to, I write all the feelings down in a journal. Hopefully the homecoming and transition will be smooth. Don't feel horrible about your sister leaving for college. It is a change for the whole family but she'll come back - she's still your sister and it's not like life ends when one goes to college, it just transitions to a new phase.
    When two hearts are meant for each other, no distance is too far,
    no time is too long, and no other love can break them apart.

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      #3
      Hi, my SO too does the distance thing after I get home. That is why usually we don't skype the first night. I just write in my journal, and then we talk the next day or the day after that.

      Anyway, dont stay up to wait for him. Give him a call or text and tell him he should be there or let you know sooner. You have your own life to lead and waiting up makes everybody feel like crap. Most likely he did not mean it like that, but her has to change non the less.
      I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
      - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



      "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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