Over it

[ShaOlita]

I don't really know how I am going to explain this but please bare with me.
I've been in a long distance relationship with my SO since May 18, 2013 last year and we have never met.
My SO and I are still just teenagers.

At the beginning of our relationship, for a long 6 months, my SO and I had a difficult time dealing with finding acceptance from her parents.
This really hurt me, including the amount of arguing her and I did.

Now, even though we have acceptance, things have been so much better and we argued less but when we do argue, it really hurts.
I've been doing A LOT of thinking since she has been gone due to the electricity being cut off from the typhoon.
Some part of me wants me to break up with her, another part of me doesn't and I doubt that I will even though I am so tired and exhausted, I'm just over it.
I'm over each argument we have, how it's as if her nasty words have scarred in my heart.
I can't even express myself completely any more, I'm so scared I will get yelled at by her.
She has Internet now but we aren't able to Skype. I spoke to her before and I said ''I think I want to break up with you. I've been doing a lot of thinking since you have been gone.'' She went offline after.
I'm not sure whether to tell her how I feel or tell her the next time we can Skype? I'm also very afraid that she may get angry at me because she won't understand my reasons in why I feel that way.
I don't even know any more and I'm sorry this is confusing for you to read because for myself, I'm even confused. I'm not used to expressing things like this to people.
Oh what do I do....

[TwoThree]

Here's my opinion: breaking up should not necessarily be an agreement. Of course you owe it to her to let her know that you are breaking up with her, and if you want to do the right thing, tell her exactly why, but it's not like you need her blessing and understanding. It is your right to walk out. If your relationship is so toxic, if your SO is so abusive towards you that you literally get scared of telling her that you want to end things, then I think you should just cut all ties and prevent her from contacting you again.

[LovingAcrossTheAtlantic]

I completely agree with TwoThree. I'd just like to add that I don't think you should wait until you Skype. I think you should write her a message or email and explain why you are doing it, and also explain that you don't wish to talk to her anymore. (As TwoThree said, you need to cut ties). And if I were you, I'd block her before she replies, because she will probably try to stop you and make you feel bad, promise she will change, and then a few weeks or even months later she will be back to her old ways.

You can message me anytime if you need someone to talk to about it as well.

[lilspitfire]

Agreed. If you're unhappy, you should leave. Emotional abuse can lead to other types of abuse.

[differentcountries]

You are entitled to break off if you want to. Feeling exhaustedafter a year of fighting is understandable. Can you picture a way of communication where you can feel safer? Like, she backs off the yelling and you find ways to contribute to a calm environment where problems can be adressed differently? If not, this sounds like the end of the road.