Am I making a big deal out of nothing?

[differentcountries]

There is always going to be differences in a couple. I think what you mean is, how will you be able to feel like you can behave natural around his money or rather the uppertunities it brings? The answer to this is: your SO. Your SO is your mentor about everything in his life. Also, you might include SO to some things in your life that he is not very familiar with. Like me, I might be richer than SO but when it comes to his language and culture I am still a child trying to learn the most basic things. I am sure your SO is not an expert of all in your life! :-)

[silvermoonfairy3]

I agree with TwoThree that it seems like you're resenting him for his circumstances/upbringing, and/or seeking out some of that shame.
It does seem like your SO is bringing these things up to share with you, and that he's just treating it as part of his life, which he's welcoming you into.

If things are constantly making you feel like it's too unbalanced, it might be worth talking to him about or thinking about your own views, but it doesn't seem like it's remotely reached that point. It's not like he's spending obscene amounts of money buying you fancy jewelry or a private jet or anything, and it doesn't sound like he's making a big deal about what he does spend on you/your relationship. (And, for some people, even if he was spending money on the jewelry, etc. as long as he can afford it and wants to, why not?)

I like things to be somewhat in balance, which I'm guessing you probably do, too, but you need to figure out how that works for your relationship. Maybe your SO spends more money on things, but you make more handmade gifts or something. There are different ways to balance out the "spending" in a relationship, and money is only one piece of it.

Good luck!

[GuineaPunk]

Try not to worry too much about where you have both come from, just try and focus on where you are going. As the others have said, he can't help that he was born into more money than you; resenting him for the opportunities that money has bought him isn't going to do your relationship any good.

Equally your income does not define your worth in the relationship I earn in three days about the same as my SO earns in a whole month, but we don't let it become a problem. He has had moments where he gets frustrated because he feels that he hasn't achieved as much as me, but we both understand that we are from two polar opposite economic climates, everything is relative. My family nag me to find a wealthier man so I can be a 'lady of leisure' (pah I say!), but I just tell them that I am happy with my humble chicken farmer; he has a heart of gold. It certainly doesn't sound like your man feels that an inbalance in money is an issue, but you can always talk to him about it if it is for you.

[snow]

I agree. This is not about him having more money and throwing it in your face, this is you resenting him over his past, his experiences and things he cannot change while he is offering to show you something extraordinary! Imagine him sharing this piece of history with you! His grandfather designed the exhibits! You can see what his family did in the past! This is awesome and I would totally go for it!!

Someone making you feel bad about having money is different. My ex-boyfriend's family is pretty wealthy and therefore he had loads of money as well and he let me feel it every single day. Whenever we went out to go grocery shopping he would make sure I understood that he is paying for it so he will only take the things he wanted, not the things we needed. Mind you, we shared an apartment and my salary payed the rent and utility bills, so he had to buy food. Never again.

[AngelofFluffiness]

It's only what you make it out to be. Personally, I wouldn't look at it that way. Look at it as a chance for new experiences. After all, if your roles were exchanged, would you then feel like you need to find somebody more?
Love doesn't see money or differences. It just sees the hearts involved.

[lilspitfire]

Well I have discussed it with him. It's not actually about HIM. That's where it's hard to explain. I had a long talk with a girlfriend of mine about what I really mean (she understands me more than anyone and get what I'm saying even if I'm not actually saying it where it makes sense) and she directed me to see it from a different standpoint that made me see what you're all saying in the way I needed to. I'm probably not making any sense, but all I'm saying is.....I understand your advice based off what she said. I'm not the type of person to be with someone for their money so that has nothing to do with it. I worked for everything I have. Nothing was given to me. I think that was my whole thing. I felt like there was a connection with him I was losing because of this. He originally didn't want me to find out until we met that he came from money because he knew of my background and my life. We never brought it up. I don't even remember the conversation that led to it now....my finding out. I know I won't let this affect our relationship because he isn't his background. He's something else. A great man with a great heart. It was more of the difference in being raised. Him not knowing struggles and me knowing them.