It's Over- In Shock.

[Zapookie]

Block him and cut contact. You'll be OK <3

[Hollandia]

Thank you all again. He has emailed me since the breakup and has somehow found a way to put the blame all on me. The entire email was basically him telling me that all of this was my fault, etc, etc. It's really been an eye-opening experience. I'm crushed but extremely angry at the same time. I thought I knew who he was.

He cursed you out, he said he had been disrespecting you and now he blames you for all of it. Block him, he is not the person that he pretended to be when you first met him. There is no excuse for his behavior in any way. This is all about him trying to make himself feel okay for being such a complete and total douche.

[RachelAnne]

I know I need to cut contact from him, but it's so hard after loving him for three years. I keep re-reading his email and it only makes me feel worse about myself...without giving too much away, he basically just told me it was my fault, my personality. Two pages of him shitting on me, basically, and I keep torturing myself reading it, trying to figure out what went wrong. I honestly have no idea how to let go of three years. I can barely make it through my day.

[lilspitfire]

DO. NOT. BLAME. YOURSELF. He's the asshole, not you.

[Moon]

I know I need to cut contact from him, but it's so hard after loving him for three years. I keep re-reading his email and it only makes me feel worse about myself...without giving too much away, he basically just told me it was my fault, my personality. Two pages of him shitting on me, basically, and I keep torturing myself reading it, trying to figure out what went wrong. I honestly have no idea how to let go of three years. I can barely make it through my day.

Nobody really knows how to let go of someone, there's no secret formula for it, you figure it out as time passes. You won't wake up tomorrow feeling whole again, but as the days go by it starts getting better, even if you don't notice it at first. After a while you'll realize things are good again, but you have to recognize the process and be patient. Cutting contact is the beginning to healing, so do that first and go from there, understanding how awful you feel right now is just a temporary thing, you will get over him. Almost everybody goes through this, and we all come out of the other side a bit wiser and less naive about love in general. Be strong, be kind to yourself and keep yourself occupied.

[RachelAnne]

Nobody really knows how to let go of someone, there's no secret formula for it, you figure it out as time passes. You won't wake up tomorrow feeling whole again, but as the days go by it starts getting better, even if you don't notice it at first. After a while you'll realize things are good again, but you have to recognize the process and be patient. Cutting contact is the beginning to healing, so do that first and go from there, understanding how awful you feel right now is just a temporary thing, you will get over him. Almost everybody goes through this, and we all come out of the other side a bit wiser and less naive about love in general. Be strong, be kind to yourself and keep yourself occupied.

Thank you for this. I know time eventually heals all wounds. I've been talking to him almost every day since I was thirteen years old. He's been in my life for 8 years, and I wish I could just erase all of those years from my memory. Even still, I still can't help but feel the urge to text him something funny, something, anything to make him talk to me. And I hate myself for that, but this is killing me. I'm sorry again, I don't mean to whine about a breakup to any of you, I just am in shock and didn't see this coming at all. I have been (and still am) going to counseling for anxiety, and he had told me just a week ago that he noticed progress. I'm trying to be strong and hold my head high, but I feel like falling apart every five minutes. I know work is going to be hell for me today.

Thank you again for all of the kind words. he basically dumped me over email, and as upset as I am over that, I can't make him pick up the phone and give me a proper goodbye. I never wanted eight years of friendship to end as ugly as this is, but I guess I'll have to accept that it is what it is and try my best to move on.

[differentcountries]

He knew your personality good and well when he intered the relationship. He is just making up a fake reason just so he will not feel awful about ending things.

[R&R]

He knew your personality good and well when he intered the relationship. He is just making up a fake reason just so he will not feel awful about ending things.

This, this!! He is apparently the type of person who can not admit that he doesn't want the relationship anymore, so will blame you instead so he can walk away feeling no guilt. You need to delete that email instead of torturing yourself reading over and over something that is not true.

[rhabdoviridae]

What an awful way to end a relationship Like Moon said, there's no magic fix to a broken heart, but there are definitely a couple things that will move you in the right direction. The best you can do is cut contact, delete that email and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. It will get better, you just have to wait it out. Hang in there <3