Not sure how to handle this...

[Ariel23]

Long story short our LDR has gone on for almost 4 years with lots of ups and downs. After lots of fights and arguing recently, my SO basically told me she gave up on us and lost hope and was done with us. The feeling isn't mutual on my end I want to work things out bc I love her. Needless to say I was pretty heartbroken over this and I told her if she truly feels that way I can't be friends with her bc I can't be just friends with someone I'm in love with. I basically told her that if she wants me to move on with my life and she with hers, that I don't want her to contact me. So we had no contact for about 3 weeks which was pretty hard for me to do since we have talked every day for the last 4 years but I did it. I randomly got a text over the weekend about 2 weekends ago which was very odd, out of nowhere she text me (or so I thought) two selfies of herself and a text. I replied back and got no reply. So I let that go and didn't continue texting then the same thing happened again a few days later. I sent a text back and she told me she didn't know who sent the pics of her other people were using her phone to take pics. Which I don't really buy that story why would some random person just send me selfie pics of her from her own phone?!

Anywho that was about 2 weeks ago. After that convo I continued with the no contact and then a few days later she started texting me. For about 2 weeks she has been texting me almost every day. Some days sporadically and others all day.

My problem is I don't really know where things stand bc she just started talking me like nothing ever happened. She didn't apologize or say she made a mistake and didn't mean what she said. I guess my question is do I just come out and ask her what her intentions are with me? Or just wait it out and see what happens? It's kinda driving me a bit crazy not knowing. I'm glad to be speaking to her but at the same time I don't want to be lead on if her intentions are to only be friends.

[80anthea]

I guess my question is do I just come out and ask her what her intentions are with me? .

Yes, I think you need to do this so you know once and for all.

[differentcountries]

This is not leading anywhere good. Don't even think in terms of "what does she want", she is a confused person who dislikes confrontation, she has no idea what she wants and she doesn't want to be called on it. The best way for you is to slowly dissapear from her life.

[ronjaandbirk]

This is not leading anywhere good. Don't even think in terms of "what does she want", she is a confused person who dislikes confrontation, she has no idea what she wants and she doesn't want to be called on it.

I agree.. Seriousy don't let her do the "I want the comfort of you loving me but I don't want to get my head straight and sort it out" thing with you. Anyone deserves better than that.

I'd suggest you tell her again that you don't wish to be contacted from her unless she changed her mind and loves you enough to give things a serious try. And also tell her that IF she changed her mind, she hast to talk to you about what happened and not just pretend nothing happened. Everyone can have a case of serious doubt in an LDR, it IS rough as hell sometimes, but then you can't hurt the other person like that AND pretend nothing happened.

In case she can't explain yourself or stick to your rules of not wanting "friends" contact, block her. Everywhere.

Also I'm really sorry you have to go through this

[Redheart14]

If her messages are causing you to feel like this, block her or ignore her. She ended it, you were finally doing ok and then she's texting you. That's not fair. Block and move on, you deserve better.

[Ariel23]

This is not leading anywhere good. Don't even think in terms of "what does she want", she is a confused person who dislikes confrontation, she has no idea what she wants and she doesn't want to be called on it. The best way for you is to slowly dissapear from her life.

Well...this turned out to be true. I asked her what her intentions were with me and she avoided the question. As soon as I asked that question, she just said I'm not going to argue and was going to go. All I did was ask a question and she made it about her and how I was just trying to start an argument.

[whatruckus]

Well...this turned out to be true. I asked her what her intentions were with me and she avoided the question. As soon as I asked that question, she just said I'm not going to argue and was going to go. All I did was ask a question and she made it about her and how I was just trying to start an argument.

Just be done with her. My ex did this to me a lot and it really messed me up emotionally. It made me think everything was my fault and it annoyed me that he would never talk about problems, he just ignored them and pretended like they never happened. You don't need that type of confusion in your life.

[rhabdoviridae]

This is emotional manipulation; if she's going to contact you, she needs to be upfront with her intentions. At this point she either doesn't know what she wants or, more likely, wants the attention and security of feeling wanted. I agree: block and move on.