I can't help but think that ldrs are the worst of both worlds. You come home to an empty home as though you were single. At the same time you can't enjoy the freedom that usually comes with being single. In order to make me (and the rest of us) feel less pitiful, list all the things that uniquely come with ldrs, please. And go!
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positive things in ldrs
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Just that you can really truly fall in love with that person and build such a strong emotional connection that sometimes the physical aspects of the relationship get in way of doing in the beginning. Also you get to appreciate the 'little' things when you are finally able to be together.
Met online: 04.19.14
Became a couple: 04.23.14
First Visit: 08.09.14-08.15.14
Second Visit: 12.17.14-12.28.14
Third Visit: 02.13.15-02.15.15
Fourth Visit: 04.03.15-04.06.15
CLOSED THE DISTANCE/GOT MARRIED: 06.22.15/06.27.15
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I think the deeper level of connection and the visible effort are the two biggest things. You just get a much deeper connection with someone when you can't be together physically and rely solely on emotions and communication to fall in love with each other. It's quite a different experience than anything I got out of my past CDR's, I've never felt a connection nearly as deep as the one with my boyfriend. My communication skills have become MUCH better since we've been together. Effort might be visible in a CDR, but sometimes it isn't always noticed or it's taken for granted. I definitely notice when my boyfriend puts a little more affection into what he's saying when we're talking. I notice when he stays up an extra hour with me to talk instead of getting an extra hour of sleep for work, or when I'm upset and he does everything in his power to make me feel better. I can see that he puts effort into the relationship to make it work because he (and I) have to.
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The positives are easy.. A friendship blossoms.. We share everything we know.. We don't worry as much about what the person looks like, only what they are made of.. Telling secrets late at night on the phone... The first skype,(which I was scared to death, lolz) the moment you first see each other on that webcam and realize this is the one Ive been looking for.. The anticipation of the first meeting.. The butterflies making you feel woozy... The protection of a best friend in the truest form.. I could go on forever.. I walk past couples everyday and think, yes, it is beautiful to be together, but do they know each other like we do? Or do they go about their days caught up in their problems and forgetting why they loved each other in the first place??... Sorry, rambling I guess...
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I can honestly this say that my LDR is the healthiest and happiest relationship I've ever had. We've taken the opportunity to read each other from the inside out, and that has created such a strong bond between the two of us. I've dated people in CDR for many years who could never read my moods even when we were in the same room! But with Kris - he's learned every tone I have, the breathing I use in different circumstances, words I use when I'm happy/sad/upset/etc. You really get to know and understand the person you are with. I love that we are able to fall in love all over again with every visit. You appreciate the person more, and the time you get together much more! I can say for a fact that I know Kris, and he knows me better than we've ever known any other person we've dated...and that's beautiful. That's my favorite thing about my LDR. Sure, I'd love be able to kiss him every single day of my life - and I will one day but what we have right now is fantastic."I ran to him. I dropped my luggage and ran to him. My heart melted in my chest as I wrapped my arms around his neck. I could feel him. I could kiss him. I could smell him. He was real. He was here. He is mine."
He could be a million miles away...and still be worth every single mile <3
We met in 2012
We became a couple in April 2014
Our lips first met August 8, 2014
Our beautiful 2nd visit was November 2014
Hoping to visit again for a New Years kiss
We'll spend my birthday and Valentines day in each other's arms <3 - Feb 2015
Our "spring break" in March 2015
Summer fun - June 2015
DISNEY WORLD!!! Sept 2015
LOVE > DISTANCE
QUALITY > CONVENIENCE
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An LDR is great for honing your communication skills. There is no room to leave important things unspoken - You can only communicate verbally, so you have to make use of it. Plenty of relationships, both LD and CD, fall apart because people don't communicate openly. An LDR is like communication bootcamp, and learning to drop fears and false pride when it comes to being honest is fantastic for any relationship, especially when you close the distance. Also, you have to really put in effort to make the relationship work and coordinate with each other, which is also a really valuable skill to have.
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The positive sides of an LDR:
1 Since, for the first nine weeks of our relationship, we only saw each other in person the first couple of days, the rest were spent talking daily on Skype and getting to know each other really well.
2 Going crafty and creative to express my love with books etc.
3 Learning how to travel by myself
4 Learning how to cut down on expenses
5 Stretching my communication skills, because of distance, polyamory and not speaking the same mother tounge
6 Starting to learn a new language
7 Getting to know a new country and culture
8 Our time together is always special (even though we see enough of each other to have a bit of cd feel, too)
9 Getting really comfortable in airports... I am grateful because they bring me to him!
10 Taking up my studies again because I needed something to do while he was working
11 Cutting down on material side in home town because living simple with him has been good for me. Reinventing myself in so many ways that would not be possible was I not forced to stay a lot out of town (even abroad)I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
- Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"
"Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits
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Originally posted by dizzyupthemeg View PostMy favorite positive by far is the fact that I don't have to shave my legs everyday.
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